So much to my chagrin, the walking toothache Derek Anderson "won" a championship ring with the Heat. DA has the distinction of being the only player on Miami's active roster who didn't play a single second in the NBA Finals (Game 1, Game 2, Game 3, Game 4, Game 5, and Game 6.) Hell, even Jason Kapono and Mike Doleac saw a few minutes. In fact, Derek tallied a whopping 65 minutes in almost two months of playoff basketball with the Heat. Way to earn your keep Derek.
I don't know what the rules are amongst NBA players when it comes to rocking the champ ring when you had absolutely nothing to do with the success of that team, but my guess is that DA sports the jewels a few times and then pawns it off to finance a couple root canals and those gold fronts that he's been drooling over in the window front of his dentist's office.
So in honor of Derek's good fortune (and because I don't want to devote any more thought to him that is absolutely necessary), I submit this picture for a photo caption contest:
Note the grace in which DA gets blown by on defense, and then the honor and sportsmanship that he shows by throwing a clothesline at the equally glass-jawed Vince Carter. Leave your best caption in the comments, and you're sure to win the admiration and respect from your peers that has and will forever elude Derek Anderson for as long as he shall live.
e-mail at: firstname.lastname@example.org
Dave demands it.