The Portland Trail Blazers' Off-Season Recap
by broyposse on Sep 24, 2010 8:38 AM PDT
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Print++ Bumped to front page. Incredible work. - Ben ++
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What is up buttercups!?!!??!?!
Not my first time but it has been a long time and a long summer for us Blazer fans. Since you guys know I'm SOOOO connected, I figure I recap the Blazers' Off-Season by giving you a view into my social network. I'm missing a few events but I might post some more later on.
I'm expecting a call from Aaron Sorkin to participate in the Social Network 2 - "NBA FACEBOOK: THE OFFSEASON...stolen from the pages of the NBA's private Facebook network"
Peace. Stay Cool. Forever.
- BRP
"The Trailblazers’ Off-Season"
185 comments
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141 recs |
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1st
kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahn
by cloudydays on Sep 24, 2010 12:28 AM PDT reply actions 2 recs
This might be the funniest post ever.
I can’t even pick a favorite one. I love Dan Gilbert’s comic sans.
Big rec.
this post is the inception of blazersedge posts
a lot of hype, that it totally lives up to and blows your mind!
I thought that was supposed to be the lost Dougall vs. BRP basketball tape
"Listening to the media only increases your odds of failing at whatever you are doing" - Mark Cuban
This BRP doesn't stink
Very funny. A++++. Would read again!!111
m0r71m3r
#52
by Mortimer on Sep 24, 2010 1:04 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
no words
HAHAHA! amazing stuff BRP. i miss you
"I don't know Twitter" - Rudy Fernandez
by RoodiePhirnandizz on Sep 24, 2010 1:12 AM PDT reply actions
Training Camp Posse
"Listening to the media only increases your odds of failing at whatever you are doing" - Mark Cuban
by Norsktroll on Sep 24, 2010 4:25 AM PDT reply actions 23 recs
REC!!! hahaha the dislike is awesome ...i forgot about my Nate post...i'll post later...your response:
I’d meet BRP at the airport, not flee!! - fanfaraway
by broyposse on Sep 24, 2010 8:13 AM PDT up reply actions 6 recs
Oh and I loved the post, especially the war room song, the Danny Ferry and the Kahn and Gilbert.
Not trying to steal your Thunder
"Listening to the media only increases your odds of failing at whatever you are doing" - Mark Cuban
hahah keep it coming Norsk
your upside down thumb and Marca saying “dislike” is awesome(very creative)…
but anyways, no thunder stealing here…keep doing it! the more we can make fun of Rudy and Larry Miller’s pony, the merrier…you are killing it.
maybe we should start planning the mid season recap…i’m sure a lot of things will come up by then.
I’d meet BRP at the airport, not flee!! - fanfaraway
OBrienSchofieldismyHero likes this
Maybe Koa Misi and Jared Odrick would be Patriots if Bill Parcells wasn't Comedic.Sans's father...
"I looked at BN once. I got banned." -the immortal words of JShufelt
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Sep 24, 2010 10:00 AM PDT up reply actions
It's sad because its probably true...
I mean, really.
Maybe Koa Misi and Jared Odrick would be Patriots if Bill Parcells wasn't Comedic.Sans's father...
"I looked at BN once. I got banned." -the immortal words of JShufelt
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Sep 24, 2010 12:11 PM PDT up reply actions
The Farmville bit
Is pure win.
"My shoulder is OK. And away we go." -- Nic Batum
"wang-dang diddly wubba SPROING wow-wow" -- Dave
by DonkeyShins on Sep 24, 2010 11:14 AM PDT up reply actions
I think we need amlmart to translate the original spanish exchange between rudy and sergio!
Please, for the love of all that is holy, please stop using the following: "Book it.", "FTW", "Epic" & "Fail".
...no seriously--stop.
SMH
JD 9/13: Facebook Stinks Edition
That's Tight!
by tominhawaii on Sep 24, 2010 5:05 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Best. Post. Ever.
"A bizarre and extremely rare hybrid Blazer/Laker fan, Timbo has always struggled to contain the Beast Within, like Dr. Jekyll, Bruce Banner, or Ted Kennedy." — Miled Animal
by timbo on Sep 24, 2010 8:00 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Ahhh spanish translation anyone?
I didn’t get the Rudy and Sergio interaction!!! Should’ve paid attention in class.
Blazers basketball? Just basketball you say? More like a way of life
please correct me if I am wrong
Rudy: I am one of the best players of basketball in the whole world!
Sergio: Me too!
Rudy: Hi Sergio! Let’s cut our hair and ( ?? )
Sergio: Yeah! And let’s buy some pants to play in!
Rudy: My heart aches for you.
Sergio: Hugs
"Religion is the banana skin: spirituality is the banana." ~ Roger Nygard, "The Nature of Existence"
thanks for the translation. i was wondering what the jokes were in that one.
"My love winks, she does not bother / She knows too much to argue or to judge"
by DrivetheLane on Sep 24, 2010 9:04 AM PDT up reply actions
the beautiful FanFarAway did the translation but you are pretty much spot on
to answer your (??)
Rudy: I am one of the best players of basketball in the whole world!
Sergio: Me too!
Rudy: hi sergio, lets get our hair cut and highlights
Sergio: yeah, and lets buy some matching pants
Rudy: i miss you:(
sergio: hugs :)
bwahahahaha
I’d meet BRP at the airport, not flee!! - fanfaraway
i like the “my heart aches for you” line better
"My love winks, she does not bother / She knows too much to argue or to judge"
by DrivetheLane on Sep 24, 2010 9:15 AM PDT up reply actions
sweet
my spanish sucks less than I think it does!
"Religion is the banana skin: spirituality is the banana." ~ Roger Nygard, "The Nature of Existence"
way off on the pants line, though.
"Religion is the banana skin: spirituality is the banana." ~ Roger Nygard, "The Nature of Existence"
Funny none the less.
"...it was like he brought his own personal cross-wind to the arena." - Dave
Worst Dinner ever is prolly my favorite
since Paul Allen likes it.
Blazers basketball? Just basketball you say? More like a way of life
no words
next year post this in May so we can all take the summer off and catch some rays
When reached 40 years of following Portland basketball you have, be as passionate of the Trail Blazers you will not!
monumentally hilarious
“It’s not always about you Tom” — Todd Leiweke
and the BF1/JP exchange was spot on.
You made an agonizingly long no Blazers summer just dissappear. Kudos my friend.
PS… I still haven’t forgot the bet… I won’t welch out
"The great charm of cats is their rampant egotism, their devil-may-care attitude toward responsibility, their disinclination to earn an honest dollar." - Robertson Davies
This was easily the highlight of the off season
Forget Wesley Matthews and all the other FA signings… wait… there were none… But yeah really enjoyed this. Thanks BRP!
Blazers basketball? Just basketball you say? More like a way of life
by dyshooter182 on Sep 24, 2010 9:38 AM PDT up reply actions
thanks! i think it was as much fun for me to do…i had some NSFBE ones but decided against it…hahaha
I’d meet BRP at the airport, not flee!! - fanfaraway
Rec 35 goes to Ben for front-paging this sucka. – Elgin
"Religion is the banana skin: spirituality is the banana." ~ Roger Nygard, "The Nature of Existence"
by 22baylor on Sep 24, 2010 8:40 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
channeling puffy in the war room is priceless
by Ben Golliver on Sep 24, 2010 8:43 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Best ending
I didn’t know you could micro-fracture…oh wait, I get it. That’s naaasty.
Stealth > Wealth
...just microfractured some girls butt :/
You’re the bee’s knees
If what I just commented turns out to be wrong, please delete from all memory.
Nice work
It’s only missing a “Travis Outlaw found a largemouth bass in his enchanted pond in Farmville!”
by LaColin on Sep 24, 2010 9:01 AM PDT reply actions 3 recs
Nice, nice
Kind of freaks me out that I actually get every reference. What a bunch of nerds we all are.
Great stuff.
by travis13 on Sep 24, 2010 9:13 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
This just made my week
I am trying really hard not to laugh too hard in my cubicle/office space. Oh man, priceless!
I like the first one
kupchak and wallace lol.
by blueyepoplocker on Sep 24, 2010 9:31 AM PDT reply actions
A great Friday Pick-me-up
haven’t laughed that hard in a while. Thanks for the effort
A great Friday Pick-me-up
haven’t laughed that hard in a while. Thanks for the effort
Likes this!
That was great, lolz!
Tie down the furniture kids, it's time for another ride down Ulcer Gulch!
by DMKPDX on Sep 24, 2010 9:40 AM PDT via mobile reply actions
this is fantastic
Bert Kolde became a fan of Living off my best friend.
I LOL’d hard at that
by BlazingTheTrail on Sep 24, 2010 9:44 AM PDT reply actions
I'll admit that I didn't get that one. Explain?
Blazers basketball? Just basketball you say? More like a way of life
by dyshooter182 on Sep 24, 2010 10:20 AM PDT up reply actions
He happened to be Allen’s roommate in college, and has benefitted from that ever since in business and as a vice chairman of the Blazers.
"Listening to the media only increases your odds of failing at whatever you are doing" - Mark Cuban
by Norsktroll on Sep 24, 2010 10:29 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'll be sad when BRP leaves us for Miami
by hoodieNation on Sep 24, 2010 9:45 AM PDT reply actions 9 recs
NazgulPosse
"Religion is the banana skin: spirituality is the banana." ~ Roger Nygard, "The Nature of Existence"
by 22baylor on Sep 24, 2010 10:11 AM PDT up reply actions 5 recs
hahaha
"So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."
by GiantBlazer on Sep 24, 2010 12:37 PM PDT up reply actions
Amazing. How'd you do that?
Please do that every year.
I’m hitting the Rec link like Ken Jennings pounding the Jeopardy buzzer.
eBow to Broyposse.
YOWZA!
Awesome. Just awesome.
But I’d guess GO is doling out “macrofractured.”
Born Naked
by Y5k on Sep 24, 2010 9:52 AM PDT via mobile reply actions
I just mass texted this to my whole contact list.
No joke.
LOVE. IT.
Hey Amar'e! I've got an elbow for you!
by ripcitysarah on Sep 24, 2010 10:06 AM PDT reply actions 3 recs
Some debates never stop even on the mighty NBA social network
"Listening to the media only increases your odds of failing at whatever you are doing" - Mark Cuban
by Norsktroll on Sep 24, 2010 10:09 AM PDT reply actions 21 recs
MEOW
You can measure skill and talent with your eyes, but productivity is shown through statistics.
you forgot to mention that Al Horford's coke dealer liked Cho's post
OJ Mayo is the Blazers' PG of the Future
by GreatOden'sRaven on Sep 24, 2010 11:46 AM PDT up reply actions
hahaha LOL for having PA buy Grizz on Farmville!
I’d meet BRP at the airport, not flee!! - fanfaraway
Love the Meow by Dave
"Knowledge will get you from A to B. Creativity will get you anywhere." Einstein
by Garden of ODEN on Sep 24, 2010 9:54 PM PDT up reply actions
loved it!
Until he's not, Rudy's a Blazer.
by collectiveshane on Sep 24, 2010 10:31 AM PDT reply actions
Too Much Fun!
So many laughs in one post…I just love the “likes this” people.
Thanks!!!
wake me in 2011
Wow.
I’m just blown away. Fantastic post!
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
Dude, this was absolutely hilarious.
I think my personal favorite was “Ben Golliver: I’ll give you the name of my barber”
You can measure skill and talent with your eyes, but productivity is shown through statistics.
This is amazing
No words
Q: Is Greg favoring his knee?
Frye: He favors dunking on your head, that's what he favors.
AWESOMELY FUNNY BRP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! REC # 75!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Greatest Post and Thread in the History of Eternity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
More clever-funny than ha-ha funny.
And spectacularly done!
"I come to you now, at the turn of the tide." -- Brandon "Gandalf" Roy, April 24th, 2010
that'll do brp..
that’ll do……
OJ Mayo is the Blazers' PG of the Future
by GreatOden'sRaven on Sep 24, 2010 11:48 AM PDT reply actions
Genius...
Pure, unadulterated genius. Recced
you guy's are aweful... lmaoamfday.... +1 :)
The Faith don't panic, the faith freaks out, burns out farms, and torchs small villages in the name of The Faith.
Head Czar of Amerika <--- Mortimer said so so there!!!
by faith on Sep 24, 2010 12:53 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Thanks BuRP, and you too Norskie!
I needed a good laugh and you guys have gone the extra mile to provide it.
#52
LOL....Fantastic! hahaha!
Barrett: You are going to score 35 tonight.
Bayless: Ya think?
MB off by only four, my oh my.
We must all forget about this post quickly
For every subsequent post will fall so short of the glory that is this recap that the rest of the site will seem downright mediocre in comparison.
...
Paul Allen (Apprentice Brawler) just Iced Tom Penn in Mafia Wars, bringing his body count to 1. Paul Allen is offering a bounty for any friend that fights their enemy: Level 182 Consigliere Kevin Pritchard.
by LaColin on Sep 24, 2010 2:09 PM PDT reply actions 2 recs
I've got rec 99. Who'll make it 100?
Also, fantastic post, BRP. I think this post and the fact that press day is Monday officially marked the summer as “over”.
by Montavilla Steve on Sep 24, 2010 2:26 PM PDT reply actions
Why are all the posts 4 hours ago?
And the first three comments on each one are 4 hours ago, and then they are all 3 hours ago. And some of the war room comments don’t even have the time!!! I mean, this is a pretty good post, but how am I supposed to rec such shoddy work?
Yeah, I should have been an editor.
When the world knows Nico Batum as "The Inevitable", I'll be very happy with where he is as a player.
I wondered the same thing about all the posts being from 4 hours ago!
Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?
It's just to make it seem like the offseason has only been a few hours
It failed, but it was a nice try.
When the world knows Nico Batum as "The Inevitable", I'll be very happy with where he is as a player.
We don't allow rational explanations around here
When the world knows Nico Batum as "The Inevitable", I'll be very happy with where he is as a player.
by ictoagsn on Sep 24, 2010 3:26 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Illusion is the first of all pleasures.
And, despite that failure, I was certainly pleased by the try. :)
Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?
This is by far the funniest thing I have seen on here.
It needs to be in the side bar. Thank you for the laugh! I needed it today.
My favorite teams are the Blazers and any team that is playing the Lakers.
is jeff pendergraph really cloudy days?
"I told somebody to stop crying," Pendergraph said after the game. "Actually, I told them all to stop crying."
GUESS WHO MADE BALL DON'T LIE?
"I told somebody to stop crying," Pendergraph said after the game. "Actually, I told them all to stop crying."
searching for adequate adjectives
@#$% brilliant
BPE.
Best. Post. Ever.
Dave and Ben, this site needs some sort of archives for particularly awesome posts. This needs to be item #1.
"These are dreams that we have." --Rudolfo Fernandez
Update
By mid-afternoon on Sunday, Sep. 26, Dave STILL has not recced this magnificent opus. I guess when Dave goes off grid he does so pretty thoroughly. Prolly he’s under the influence of all those separatists up in that neck of the woods.
#52
105
now words
I love B Edge almost as much as I love B Roy and close to my love for B atum
Absolutely
hilarious!
"Look at us. We're just like everyone else. We've bought into the same, ridiculous delusion." - Revolutionary Road
Ehh....this post was OK.
"Conan, what is best in life?"
"Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women."
POIDH?
What does that mean?
"Batum must be french for: being at the right place at the right time" -
-StudMuffin15 @ Rufus On Fire
"Juwan "The Clipper Killer" Howard" - Natedog1977 @ ClipsNation
" I would trade our entire team for Brandon Roy"
- Slick4President @ Indy Cornrows
by FiveOhThree-RipCity!! on Sep 25, 2010 5:57 PM PDT reply actions
http://bedgewiki.wikispaces.com/POIDH
Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?
lol
This is freakin’ funny dude.
Greg Oden ate my baby. Need money for body-building training so that I may take my revenge.
Lots of laughs
Just what we needed to help get thru the last of the dog days. 2010-2011 season, here we come!
I was born in '52, and I believe in #52. Hang in there, GO.
You too, Przy: everyone knows you're the heart & soul of the Blazers.
I had to re-read this again!
Just as funny. This is so awesome!
My favorite teams are the Blazers and any team that is playing the Lakers.
What, you've only read it TWICE?
Five times a day I … but I’m getting ahead of myself. Here are the five pillars (Quintuple Towers) of Blazerism that I follow:
1. I profess that there is no team but the Portland Trail Blazers and Nate McMillan is their coach (for now).
2. Five times a day I face Portland and meditate on some aspect of the Blazers. (Lately this has centered around their off-season activities as told by BRP.)
3. I freely give (at least) 2.5% of my waking hours to the charitable spreading of Blazermania through Blazersedge.com.
4. I practice ritual drinking of the fermented malt and hops on the holy days; i.e. when the Blazers smite their opponents.
5. Whenever possible, at least once per year, I make a pilgrimage to the blessed Garden of Roses in Portland to witness the miraculous feats of the mighty Trail Blazers.
#52
by CatMan2 on Sep 26, 2010 9:09 PM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
I also practice tenet 4
But I also practice it during occasions when the basketball gods have decided that the Blazers must remain humble and force them to be defeated… I practice it more on these days
Blazers win!
What's the all-time record for most recommendations?
I’m pretty sure this comes close to it…
Maybe Koa Misi and Jared Odrick would be Patriots if Bill Parcells wasn't Comedic.Sans's father...
"I looked at BN once. I got banned." -the immortal words of JShufelt
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Sep 26, 2010 9:09 PM PDT reply actions
And as funny as this is
The top one deserves to stay there.
When the world knows Nico Batum as "The Inevitable", I'll be very happy with where he is as a player.
thanks everyone for the kind words!!!
it looks like Norsk and myself will need to do next year’s recap! it’s actually kinda fun so if anyone have ideas, shoot them our way.
since everyone have been so generous on the feedback sans that jerk Dario, i went ahead and did a couple more today to cap it off…not that great but the pics are funny…i think…
I’d meet BRP at the airport, not flee!! - fanfaraway
by broyposse on Sep 26, 2010 10:49 PM PDT reply actions 8 recs
eh
should have just stuck with the ones you already had
/ducks
by Sabonis4Ever on Sep 27, 2010 1:38 AM PDT up reply actions
but wait! i got one more!
I’d meet BRP at the airport, not flee!! - fanfaraway
by broyposse on Sep 27, 2010 6:21 AM PDT up reply actions 6 recs
Do you think we should periodically post a list of formerly banned Bedgers, with a note about whatever transgression(s) got them in a pickle? Like they do with convicted sex offenders?
Or should we just understand that they’ve paid their debt to society and let them quietly transition into being productive members of the community?
This B4E, though … I wonder if it’ll ever be possible to truly rehabilitate him. He continues to display worrisome schizoid tendencies.
#52
I don't have facebook.
So who is the loser now? Oh wait…
by Sabonis4Ever on Sep 27, 2010 1:56 PM PDT up reply actions
Props BRP
Well done sir, well done.
"I'm a man, but I can change.....if I have to......I guess." - Red Green
Genius.
You, sir, win the internets.
Except for one flaw – Patty would not be drinking Fosters. We in Australia export that pig swill to the rest of the world and keep the best beer for ourselves.
"I hate to recommend drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me." - Hunter S. Thompson.
1. Export Foster’s to the rest of the world
2. ???
3. PROFIT!
by Rodney Gustafson on Oct 6, 2010 3:13 PM PDT up reply actions
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