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Batum Facts JD 2/8(get it? 2 8's would be 88)


Nic Batum is pretty gosh diddly arn awesome. Agreed? good then follow me after the jump for some Batum facts.

-Nic really chose the number 88 because it's his wingspan, 8'8".

-Nic can dunk it from the free throw line, standing still.

-Nic has never seen a fastbreak he couldn't break up.

-They say it takes a week to shake off the feeling of being guarded by nic batum.

-Nic used to play goalie in soccer, but they made him quit because they decided it wasn't fair for the other team.

-The reason the Blazers got away with that 6 men on the court play last year was because the refs and opposition always feel like there are 6 blazers on the court when Nic is playing.

-Nic sometimes lets his man score, but only because he feels sorry for them having to be guarded by Nic Batum.

-They say each time Nic Batum dunks on you, you lose a year off the end of your life (just ask Pau Gasol).

-Nic keeps his hair short because if he were to grow a fro his awesomeness would cause the world to implode.

-If you look up the word awesome in a thesaurus the first alternative is Nic Batum.

-They say Jordan went to play baseball because he heard Nic Batum was coming. He came back when he realized he had some time before he was eligable.

-Nic no longer watches live games because the people playing say they can feel his defensive presence and it scares them.

-In practice they run two on one drills, Nic always wins.

-Nic never has to use bug repellent because he can guard against anything.

-Nic eats 20ppg scorers for breakfast.

-Unlike most people Nic's arms will never stop growing.

-Nic can never go to a slam dunk competition because he would be too tempted to block all the dunks.

-Rumor has it if you score 50 on Nic Batum you will live forever. Too bad that will never happen.

-Nic learned to play defense by watching a special on mother bears defending they cubs, though people say Nic would do a better job defending them.

-To fall asleep at night Nic counts fastbreak blocks.

-The real reason Nic fell in the draft was because he had no stats or game film. this happened because the other team would forfeit upon his arrival.

Those are some Batum facts I came up with, so if you still believe is the mythological creature that is the JD with a topic then have at it with some Batum facts of your own. Or don't. See if I care (hint, i might)

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