FanPost

09. Blown Pistons: The view from Detroit

 

Timlogo-be_mediumSnips and clips from the Lakers' camp, plus:

  • A Spin Around the Blazer Blogosphere
  • Haiku Game Review
  • Fried Rice
  • Blazers/Pistons Recap
  • Popcorn Machine + TBJ

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(1)

Pistons Blown Out by Blazers in Portland

by Kirkland Crawford

LaMarcus Aldridge had 19 points and 17 rebounds as the Blazers blew out the Pistons, 100-78, tonight in Portland, Ore.

Rodney Stuckey led the Pistons with 17 points. Austin Daye added 15 points and eight rebounds and Tayshaun Prince scored 10. The Pistons had only 16 assists and 17 turnovers.

In all, five Blazers were in double figures. Nicolas Batum scored 17 and Rudy Fernandez came off the bench to score 13. Brandon Roy added 11 points and Dante Cunningham scored 10. Portland outrebounded the Pistons, 45-33, and shot 50% (40-for-80) from the field. * * *

 

(2)

Pistons look sluggish in loss at Portland

by Vincent Goodwill, The Detroit News

It's happened so much in this early season it should be copyrighted: "third-quarter lethargy."

It contributed mightily to the Pistons' 100-78 loss to the Portland Trail Blazers Tuesday at the Rose Garden, ending their two-game winning streak.

LaMarcus Aldridge led the Blazers with 19 points and 17 rebounds.

After the Pistons reserves restored what could have been a blowout in the first half, cutting the lead to one at one point, the starters gave it right back.

By the time coach John Kuester made his first substitution, taking out Richard Hamilton for Ben Gordon with 4:24 left, the Blazers' lead was 16. * * *

 

(3)

John Kuester caught in a strange time in franchise history

by Vince Ellis, Detroit Free Press Pistons Blog

Flying to a layover in Seattle en route to Portland, I thought it would be a good time to give my take on the John Kuester-Rodney Stuckey drama.

As readers of this blog know, Stuckey ignored the Pistons' coach twice during Wednesday's loss at Atlanta, and he was benched for most of the second half and for the entire victory over the Charlotte Bobcats on Friday. * * *

There's talk around the Pistons that there have been other clashes between the two -- specifically during the team's workouts, which are closed to the media. * * *

The underlying tension on the team probably will flare up again -- unless it can build upon its small, much-needed winning streak.

 

(4)

Tonight was Terrible

posted by qm22 to RealGM Pistons message board

Tonight was terrible.

Too much Rip, even as he was messing things up he stayed in. Gordon never got a chance to be involved. When he and Tay were in, they held others back, particularly Stuckey.

Undersized front court after getting abused terribly by their massive bigs.

When Bynum was in he was getting abused. Not sure what his deal is-maybe not healthy? I cringe when he is in now.

It was a disorganized mess even though some players came ready to compete.

 

(5)

Free Food for Portland!

posted by Spider156 to RealGM Pistons message board

This game defines our problems. I'm very glad we got destroyed. Stuckey is playing like last season. He didn't pass at all in this game. Kuesuck needs to get fired. Rip needs to go and is getting too many minutes. Gayshawn needs to be traded.

CV, Wallace, Daye, Gordon, and Monroe did their jobs in this game. I don't expect anymore than what we got from them. None of them get enough touches.

 

(6)

BS Roster

posted by Prince of Palace to RealGM Pistons message board

I don't like Kuester that much but I think its wrong to place the blame on him when the problem is all about this BS roster

Kuester has two SGs- Rip and Gordon. Both played the same mins tonight, he can't ignore Rip as a coach half his job is to manage egos and well all know that Rip has a a big one. Its not like Rip played all game, he just played half. He was bad out there but what can Kuester do? He has two starting caliber SGs. Neither of them can really excel as long as the other one is there. Whose fault is that?

When the Pistons are getting killed and need some defense what can Kuester do? What defensive lineup can he send out there to right the ship? The Charlie V and Austin Daye tandem PF situation is so atrocious defensively its not funny. But who else can he play? Maxiel and thats it until Jonas returns. Ben Wallace is 36 years old and doesn't have much left in the tank, he can't anchor the defense.

Yeah, Kuester is a questionable coach at best. But he is working with one of the most imbalanced rosters in basketball. Pistons can't compete without defense, unless they have an elite offense and they don't have that. Thats not all on Kuester.

 

(7)

Hard to Find Any Positives in Detroit Pistons' Embar rassing Loss to the Portland Trail Blazers

by Justin Rogers, Booth Newspapers MLive.com

If you went to bed early on Tuesday night, good for you. In a season of frustrating defeats, the Detroit Pistons might have suffered their worst of the season in Portland, falling to the Trail Blazers, 100-78. Not really the way they wanted to start a four-game west coast swing.

You probably had a good idea where this one was heading early, when Portland shot 70 percent from the floor in the first quarter. * * *

The Blazers dominated nearly every facet of the game, but the tone was set in the paint on both ends of the court. The points in the paint tells you all you need to know - Portland outscored Detroit down low, 46-26. * * *

 

(8)

Pistons' Rebounding Woes Deeper than Meet the Eye in Loss to Trail Blazers

By Dan Feldman, Piston Powered (TrueHoop)

Entering the game, the Trail Blazers ranked third in the league in offensive rebounding percentage (31.9 percent).

The Pistons ranked 23rd in offensive rebounding percentage allowed (27.8 percent).

So, the Trail Blazers grabbing 28.9 percent of available offensive rebounds seems about right. But it's how they got those rebounds that keyed their 100-78 victory. * * *

Portland had an offensive rating of 175 on possessions after grabbing an offensive rebound. For perspective, the Lakers lead the league with an offensive rating of 118.3. I'm sure teams score more than usual after offensive rebounds, but I'd guess it's not typically this much more. * * *

 

(9)

Zach Randolph wants to play for Detroit?

by Steve Kays, DetroitBasketball.net

* * *
Randolph's contact expires this summer when the Pistons will only have the mid-level exception to spend (approximately $5.5M annually), assuming there is a 2011-2012 season. So if the Pistons want him they'll have to trade for him.

Prince for Randolph works straight up, but with $82M committed to Rudy Gay for the next 5 seasons it seems unlikely Memphis would bite on that. * * *

 

(10)

Road Weary Pistons Fall in Portland; Kuester at Fault?

by Rashid Umar, Need4Sheed

The Pistons fell to the Trailblazers, 100-78 Tuesday night in Portland. The game featured several runs by the home team which were sparked by a number of Detroit mistakes — including coaching blunders. * * *

Key Points:

  • The Blazers were coming off of a 121-96 shellacking at the hands of the two-time defending champion Lakers two nights earlier.
  • Rodney Stuckey led the Pistons with 17 points but only 2 assists. * * *
  • The Pistons are now 0-4 on the road. * * *
  • Blazers Rudy Fernandez, who had off season issues with the Blazer front office, made was major factor for his team in this one. He scored 13 points, grabbed 5 rebounds, and dished 3 assists, along with several energetic defensive plays. * * *

 

(11)

Pistons' Starters Struggle in Blowout Loss to Blazers

by Vince Ellis, Detroit Free Press

The Pistons had 11 assists in the first half of Tuesday night's game against the Blazers.

They had five in the second half.

Just from that, you probably can tell that the Pistons fell to 2-6 when they were blown out in the second half and lost, 100-78. The four-game, eight-day road trip got off to a rough start and Pistons coach John Kuester struggled to explain the team's problems.

"You have to prepare and do whatever it takes to be ready in the beginning of that third period —- whatever it takes for you to get that energy to play at a high level," Kuester said. "I can't exactly pinpoint exactly what we can do, but I know that we have to become better at it." * * *

 

(12)

Reasons To Get Drunk And Surly Tonight

by Kevin Sawyer, Detroit Bad Boys (SBN)

As if anyone needs a reason. The Pistons are on pace for 60 losses, give or take. That'll gitcha there. * * *

 

The Bottom Line:

1. We knew the two game winning streak was too good to be true...

2. That game was U - G - L - Y.

 

 

Blabbing about Blazer Blogs.

My self-appointed beat involves regularly covering what is reported on the blogs, newspapers, and message boards of various Blazer opponents around the country. Doing this allows me to see a wide range of approaches to coverage of pro basketball on the internet.

I may not have seen every NBA team blog that has existed over the last couple years, but the list of those I've missed is probably pretty short. I reckon that I'm in a good enough position to grade these things on a curve.

On the other hand, all the time I spend chasing around obscure publications about other teams also has a negative effect — it limits the amount of time for me to read Blazer blogs not written by guys named Dave and Ben. When I do get a chance to visit many of The Usual Blazer Sources, it's somehow feels like a vacation to a new place...

I thought it might be interesting to review the various digital publications relating to The Home Team and to share my perspective of them through well-traveled eyes.

Please bear in mind that I read none of these on a daily basis — although there are a couple to which I give more than occasional attention — so there may well be aspects or depth of coverage of certain blogs that escape me in this quick fly-by. Take everything with a grain of salt, this is just one person's opinion, arrived at briefly.

If I miss a site, please give a shout-out to them and a full URL in the comments section at the bottom and I'll pick up the ball that I dropped and make an addition.

Note also that I'm not going to pursue message boards here, only blogs — that is, periodically updated and content-driven digital publications. I also am not chasing Twitter material, only information sites with a stable URL.

Away we go...

In my opinion there are five primary types of basketball blogs: 1. official blogs produced by team employees; 2. blogs produced by newspaper sports departments; 3. blogs produced by professional journalists or fans which are part of a national blog network; 4. independent blogs produced by fans; and 5. Player blogs. We will consider each of these varieties in turn.

 

Official Blazer Blogs

 

Center Court Blog

http://www.iamatrailblazersfan.com/BroadcasterProfile/BroadcasterBlog/tabid/188/BroadcasterID/4/Default.aspx

Didja get that URL? Would you like me to repeat it?

If it's confusing to ya, that's fine, it pretty much encapsulates the convoluted and disimproved new official "I Am A Trailblazers Fan" web edifice paid for with Paul Allen's money. PA's a Microsoft guy, which goes far in explaining how things seem to have become more complex and less functional over time... (Within five years, the Blazers' official site will probably take five minutes to load and fifteen minutes to navigate. When users complain about the changes, they will be told by customer service reps in India to buy faster computers, ha ha.)

Casey Holdahl, the house blogger of the Portland Trail Blazers, was the founding editor of Blazers Edge before making his way over to 1 Center Court to take on this paying gig. Thus was the door opened for his handpicked successor, our favorite Idahoan Lutheran minister, and the rest is history...

Holdahl's Center Court Blog material is very competently written in a journalistic style and oozes with professionalism. New material appears fresh every few days.

As a company man, Holdahl necessarily adheres to the company line, which not surprisingly constrains his coverage of controversial content. Look for human interest-type fare about Blazers players and staff here, don't anticipate finding probing coverage of hot button topics. This blog is, in essence, a part of the public relations department of a for-profit corporation — the NBA franchise called the Portland Trail Blazers. It is often informative, generally quite entertaining, but ultimately advertising.

Holdahl's chief contribution to Blazer fandom is his participation in regular audio sessions with his successor at BE, Dave Deckard, during which he lets down his hair. A little. The resulting podcast is available via both the Center Court Blog and Blazers Edge and is must-listen material. The written blog, on the other hand, is what it is and is therefore best regarded as a side-dish rather than an entre.

 

Mike Barrett's Blog

http://www.iamatrailblazersfan.com/BroadcasterProfile/BroadcasterBlog/tabid/188/BroadcasterID/2/Default.aspx

Barrett_mediumAlthough like Casey Holdahl, Portland Trail Blazer broadcaster Mike Barrett is a company employee and must therefore be circumspect with his commentary and oblique in his criticism, this blog is unquestionably one of the more important sources of inside information about the team.

The tiny handful of other blogs written by other team broadcasters around the NBA are invariably terrible — Mike Barrett's Blog is different because he clearly relishes the task of writing, enjoys receiving feedback from his audience, and is meticulous about updating his site regularly to keep things fresh. It is, in a word, unique.

Barrett travels with the Blazers on PA's plane and is thus privy to backstage activities, some of which impact the decision-making of the team. He knows the players on a personal basis and is in a position to learn about their various bumps, bruises, feelings, and inclinations. He is not paid to sensationalize this material, however. Indeed, what he knows and what he actually tells seem to be two very different things.

Readers of Mike Barrett's Blog understand completely that he pulls punches and dodges certain controversial topics from occupational necessity. Regardless, Barrett's perspective of the team is informed like few others and his writing style is personal and consistently entertaining.

Dude sits next to iconic analyst Mike Rice on an airplane — how can that NOT make for good stories?

Barrett invites reader responses and the lengthy comments section beneath every post itself makes for an illuminating look at fan sentiment. Barrett sometimes replies to reader comments, which provides a sense of interaction almost universally absent from team-sponsored blogs around the association.

Barrett is personable and seems like a very nice guy. Blazer fans are lucky to have him.

This is an A+ blog, albeit hampered by the horrible new interface foisted upon him and us by the geniuses behind the "I Am A Trail Blazer Fan" software monstrosity.

 

"Cristi" the Blazer Dancer's Blog

http://www.iamatrailblazersfan.com/IAmTrailBlazersFanDancerHome/DancerBlog/tabid/187/DancerID/9/Default.aspx

Utterly vapid.

Worse yet: MB is forced to read promo cards for this piece of crap during each telecast. He should shred them and plug his own blog.

Complete garbage.

 

Newspaper Blogs

 

OregonLive Blazers Blog

http://blog.oregonlive.com/blazers/index.html

Behind the Blazers Beat

http://blog.oregonlive.com/behindblazersbeat/index.html

Part and parcel with the desperate effort of newspapers to reinvent themselves in the changed media world of the 21st Century is a proliferation of professional sports team "blogs" (so-called) created by the various papers. Some of these are quite excellent in their own right — there are a couple good ones for the Lakers. Others are nothing more than automatically generated indexes to regular sports page coverage on the team in question.

The Portland Oregonian's coverage via its OregonLIve.com website is superior to all but a few, incorporating the writing of more than one beat reporter and supplementing the regular feature articles and news accounts of games with additional content. Particularly strong is the team's use of multimedia, including post-game press video, game photo galleries, and even audio podcasts featuring the Oregonian's Man on the Make, Drama Queen Jason Quick.

Photographer Bruce Eley is a brilliant talent whose live action work is grossly underutilized in the generic and unappealing layout of the OregonLive Blazer Blog and its cross-posting sibling, Behind the Blazers Beat. In terms of content, the site is a behemoth, with a multiplicity of voices working across several formats — quality lost in a plain white wrapper. A little attention to package might go far to beef up traffic and advertising, i suggest.

Sean Meagher and Joe Freeman are among the chief contributors of original content to the blog site, and one could do a lot worse than those.

All in all, this is a good effort by a good newspaper which just happens to feature a couple of jackasses on its staff. Worth regular investigation.

 

Columbian Blazer Banter Blog

http://www.columbian.com/weblogs/blazerbanter/

Let us once again doff our caps and lament the passing into the Utah night of the great Brian T. Smith, best Blazer basketball reporter of the internet age... That Blazer First Round draft pick for BTS swap still sounds good to my ears.

The Columbian is the hard battling competitor to the Oregonian monolith. That it is able to commit even one person to the Blazer beat is a small victory for fandom. The Great Brian T. Smith's replacement, Matt Calkins, does a fully serviceable and highly professional job of recapping and recounting home games. There's just not enough hours in the day — or cash in the till — for the Columbian to really do it right.

 

Network-Affiliated Blogs

 

Portland Roundball Society (TrueHoop)

http://www.portlandroundballsociety.com/

The best Blazer blog going (outside of B - - - - - - E - - -), this baby started about a year ago, replacing a previous TrueHoop Blazer blog which had crashed and burned. 

TrueHoop, one of the two largest sports blog networks, has a fairly pronounced commercial undertone. It should be considered an auxiliary of the mainstream media by virtue of its ownership by ESPN, which is in turn owned by ABC, which is itself part by Disney Megacorp Incorporated. Its employees need to always hold close to the heart the lesson learned so painfully by the Jonas Brothers on South Park, don't mess with Mr. Mouse.

I dunno if Disney Megacorp Incorporated is making microbucks or megabucks off its sports blog network or if it's instead currently planting dollar bills in the ground and hoping they'll eventually grow into money trees, but this much is clear: it hopes to make megabucks off its blog network. (By the way, the same can be said of network rival SBN, co-founded by Markos Moulitsas of the liberal blog The Daily Kos and pretty clearly sleeping with Yahoo.)

Despite being hampered by TrueHoop's standard issue narrow swath of screen allowed for usable layout — a ridiculously thin band further shrunk with a thick navigational column and a massive header — PRS keeps things fresh with frequent updates. Of particular note are the post-game interview videos by publisher Andrew Tonry which feature the complete and unexpurgated give-and-take between coaches and players and the media at post-game pressers and in locker room interviews.

Portland Roundball Society does a fine job of providing daily Blazer links with its well-done "Pick and Scroll" column, prepared by Nathan Begley, who heads a list of seven additional contributors. Doing a basketball blog properly is about an 8 person job, and PRS has that much figured out. The size of the staff assures frequent updates, with key new material tending to pop up in the late morning hours.

Many articles are written with a statistical bent and there are periodic efforts made at whimsical and humorous approaches, albeit with mixed success. Pregame coverage is middling, postgame coverage is superlative, and reader participation is light, due in large measure to the comparative weakness of the TrueHoop/ESPN/ABC/Disney Megacorp Incorporated software package in comparison to the user-friendly commenting gear featured on the blogs of SBN.

PRS is among the credentialed members of the Portland journalistic pack, joining Ben Golliver of Blazers Edge, with Publisher Tonry himself doing Big Boy duty with the camera.

Let there be no mistake: as basketball blogs go, this is an A+ site. It could stand to be a little more timely with its outstanding post-game coverage and does need attention to the layout, as detailed above.

 

Bust-a-Bucket (Bloguin)

http://www.bustabucket.com/

Think of SportsBlog Nation and TrueHoop are the two "major" blog networks — well-oiled and coordinated machines bringing together 30 individual team blogs along with a myriad of publications about other team sports. But things do not end there. Number 3 network is Bloguin, launched in March 2009 by blogging veteran Ben Koo, a graduate of Ohio State Business School and former executive with Yardbarker.

Two Blazer-related blogs are affiliated with Bloguin, the Blazers-only Bust-a-Bucket and the Oregon Sports fiesta, Beyond the Beat.

Bust-a-Bucket is a veritable institution of Blazerdom, tracing its roots back to September 2008, when it was established by a pair of bloggers calling themselves "CDub" and "Sheed." Since then the blog has produced a steady stream of material, averaging roughly 2.5 articles a day during basketball season before essentially going dark in the summer months.

This season Bust-a-Bucket is basically a three person show, including material by Seth Johnston, Nic Batum Fanclub founder and fighter of The Good Fight Sophia Brugato, and wiseguy T-Mac. Recently Trail Post blogger Robert Runyon has joined the fun on a guest basis. One wishes for a 2-for-1 consolidation of those two blogs to help bring Bust-a-Bucket towards critical mass.

Bust-a-Bucket's coverage is consistently excellent for Blazer game recaps, albeit a tad spotty for previews and analysis. The site's layout is clean and easy to navigate and graphics, while not copious, are original and interesting. Past material is archived efficiently.

Bust-a-Bucket's traffic level is, unfortunately, quite weak. The site averages fewer than 300 unique visitors a day, barely more than 1% of the traffic of Blazers Edge and less than 1/50th of what it deserves. This is a shame, as this is a great resource with lots of fan spirit and energetic writing.

Bust-a-Bucket is quite worthy of your regular reading. It's a fine piece of work.

 

ADDENDA (FROM THE COMMENTS SECTION BELOW)

 

Massively important obscure blogger update

I’m over at Portland Roundball Society now, getting paid millions of doll hairs.

Bustabucket is being run by the excellent duo of Sophia Brugato and Robert Runyon.

by seth_johnston on Nov 11, 2010 2:50 PM PST reply actions  

 

 

 

Beyond the Beat (Bloguin)

http://www.beyondthebeat.net/

Beyond the Beat, the second Blazerish blog that is part of the Bloguin network, began as an internet vehicle for the work of freelance sportswriter extraordinaire Wendell Maxey, a first division talent. Producing a blog properly is actually a multi-person job, however, and Maxey is now being ably assisted.

Now joining Maxey and enhancing the spread of coverage are a team of five contributing writers, who cover the gamut of Northwest sports, including football and soccer. There seems to be a real trend towards coverage of Oregon university athletics.

Blazer coverage is generally limited to game previews and recaps, which tend to be shortish and not particularly illuminating. Traffic on the site averages somewhat less than 250 visitors a day. The site is competently done although it suffers from the "Jack of All Trades, Master of None" syndrome.

A new name and more coherent statement of this blog's focus of coverage would seem desirable. There is a place for this blog, but it has outgrown its name.

 

Rip City Project (Fansided)

http://ripcityproject.com/

I don't know as a fact that the Fansided blog network is smaller than the Bloguin network and bigger than the Fanball network, but if I were to take an educated guess, that's how I would rank them. None of these three networks have 30 NBA team blogs and only Bloguin makes use of a reader-accessible traffic counter. That's just my sense.

Fansided is starting to get close to a full NBA blog roster, I observe — they're now short just 3 teams.

Rip City Project is a content-heavy site focusing on Portland Trail Blazer game previews and recaps. These are lengthy, thoughtful, and well-written game summaries produced by a tag team of writers, Mike Acker and Sean Highkin.

While the blog's focused content is fine, the actual presentation of the material leaves a great deal to be desired. Rip City Project consistently uses paragraphs too long for easy readability on the internet and insufficient graphics to break up the text. Combined with a generic black-and-dark-grey background theme, these layout decisions make Rip City Project feel a bit like the www equivalent of the veritable "Gray Lady" herself, the New York Times.

One can close one's eyes and hear the readers screaming: "Give us pictures! Give us color! Don't make us wade through 3-inch long paragraphs! Use different styles of writing!"

All easily fixable things, I note.

Ultimately, the existential question facing the myriad of NBA team blogs is this: how many articles setting the table for a forthcoming game or recapping the action does a person need?

Rip City Project does a fine job of these things. So does Bust-a-Bucket. So does Blazers Edge. So does The Oregonian. So does Portland Roundball Society. So does Mike Barrett.

Do we really need six recaps?

If the number of recaps needed by the average joe is less than that, the new question becomes: What else do these various blogs bring to the party?

From which we may ask: Where does that leave Rip City Project?

My prescription here would be for the addition of two or three more writers and the expansion of coverage, combined with a Major Makeover of the layout.

It's a good blog, but it's just gonna face a tough slog if it doesn't figure out how to set itself apart and to somehow make regular visits compelling.

 

Independent Blogs


DwightJaynes.com / The Godfather

http://www.dwightjaynes.com/

Dwight_mediumFormer Oregonian journalist Dwight Jaynes used to put out a quite charming blog, featuring a graphic of him hanging out on his houseboat, offering his terse and crusty commentary on Various Oregon Sports Things floating by his front porch.

Unfortunately, life necessitated a return to gainful employment, and Jaynes morphed before our eyes from lovable old grump into a posturing mass media jackass — becoming a 95.5 The Game hysteria-monger and intentionally abrasive regular (and sometimes host) of Comcast Blazer post-game show "Talkin' Ball."

A new makeover of the DwightJaynes.com web site came hand-in-hand with his move to morning sports talk mouth. Jaynes' site now features a comical posed BS promo shot of DJ trying his hardest to look as menacing as poker pro Chris "Jesus" Ferguson but coming off resembling instead a winner of Thursday Night Dress Up at the Hermiston Moose Lodge.

Jaynes does a decent job of offering provocative opinions about a wide range of sports topics. NOW MORE PROVOCATIVE THAN EVER!!!

And remember what Dwight says:

A lot of people ask me where I get those great ties I wear on television. Well, they come from Estes, a uniquely Portland store that provides personal service I've never found anywhere else. It's located at 16th and Northwest Glisan and I'd advise you to check it out.

The naive charm of this blog's earlier incarnation is gone. I don't visit his site any more and my brief return for this review has done nothing to convince me that this decision is in any way mistaken.

Dwight — you're a smart guy, a sage veteran journalist. You've seen a lot and done a lot and are able to put things into historical perspective in an entertaining manner. Please stop trying to act like John Canzano's dad.


Trail Post

http://trailpost.blogspot.com/

Trail Post is a one-man gig started in the summer of 2008 by University of Oregon graduate Robert Runyon. Runyon tends to put up something new every couple of days and generally touches upon pre-game and post-game material, supplemented with a little Blazersy this-n-that.

He has written recently for Bust-a-Bucket  as a guest writer and it would not be a shock if some effort at consolidation is made.

Runyon's layout is clean, although graphics are light. Adrift in an internet crowded with sports coverage, it is difficult to see how this blog will survive in the long term.


El Blog Ilusorio de Rudy

http://blogderudyfernandez.blogspot.com/

So you want a little comedy, do you? How about a parody blog of what Rudy Fernandez might say, if Rudy Fernandez had a blog?

You see...

In my heart, we have much love for Rudy! But we wish further edification each day from Illusory Rudy Blog, which would help teach fanatics of Blazers team of basketball of innermost thinking of whispy but macho shooting guard of national team of España.

For example: what sentiments has Mallorcan sensation when faced with task of playing Laker team of Sasha Machine Vujacic? What does Illusory Rudy say to explain Sasha Machine having a Russian player of tennis of smoking hot good looks as future wife?

Those with love of Blazer team of basketball seek more understanding!!!

Illusory Rudy Blog photographs are excellent, but stories need to be of more quantities. Much potential of gigantic comedy exists. Idea is brilliant!!! Regularity is needed!!!

Person of illusory Rudyness must write greater for fanatics of basketball team of Portland and vigorously promote work with heavy fortitude of maximum intensity in FanShot posts on blog of Blazers Edge, please!


Blaze of Love

Last post: Feb. 22, 2010.

R.I.P.

 

 

Player Blogs

 

With the departure of Channing Frye to Phoenix and protracted silence from Greg Oden on the Yardbarker front, there are no Blazer player blogs, so far as I know.

Twitter has supplanted these in any event.

Layout? We don't need no stinking layout.

Pity.

 

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Timlogo-haiku_medium

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Old Center can't shoot

Two Forwards skinny as rails

No loss permitted

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Say "Ommmmm" and absorb life lessons from our wacky Uncle Mike...

Friedrice_medium

Mike Rice, Master of Euphemisms:

MB: Stuckey down on the deck, I'm not sure what happened...

Rice: I think he got hit in a tender spot...

 

Andre gets whacked hard driving the lane and parts go flying...

Rice: Oh, he dropped his bracelet or sormething and picked it up...

MB: It was his mouthpiece, I think...

Rice: Oh, it was his gum!

MB: Did he pick it up and put it back in his mouth?

Rice: Yeah, there's a 10 second rule on this court...

MB: Well, at least it's not at half court, there's probably a lot of traffic out there...

Rice: It's probably Juicy Fruit.

 

Game 8.

Pistons 78 at Blazers 100.

November 7, 2010.

Blazers' record is now 6-3, Pistons are 2-6.

Nothing but true sentences tonight...

  1. Blazers opened the game rested and recovered, with Brandon and LMA engaged and on target.
  2. We Blazer fans used to lust for Tayshaun Prince, but we already have him at a better price in the person of Nic Batum.
  3. The Blazers can run this year, which is a nice change.
  4. Rudy played hard.
  5. Blazers shot 70% in the opening quarter and lead 36-25 at the break.
  6. Blazers cooled off in the 2nd Quarter because nobody in the NBA can shoot 70% for a night.
  7. Pistons got hot, Blazers started to stink.
  8. Andre Miller won a jump ball, which freaked the refs out so badly that they called a phantom foul on him.
  9. The refs then immediately corrected their error with a makeup call.
  10. LMA got hot at the end of the 2nd Quarter and Blazers took a 53-45 lead to the locker room at halftime.
  11. Camby to Nic is a better-looking fast break than Blake to anybody...
  12. Tayshaun Prince is taller than Ben Wallace.
  13. Tayshaun Prince is taller than Nic Batum.
  14. Defensive play started in the 3rd Quarter.
  15. Ben Gordon has to be one of the most expensive 6th men in the NBA.
  16. Comcast is incapable of showing true instant replays. Everything has to be processed for at least a minute.
  17. LMA can still become an NBA All Star if he starts getting more aggressive in the paint. He's close.
  18. Rudy is a truly great passer.
  19. Tracy McGrady's career is finished.
  20. Blazers beat the hell out of Detroit in the 4th Quarter.

Portland 100, Detroit 78.

 


Let's take at this thang graphically, shall we?

Popcornlogo_medium

Ya gotta click THIS-HERE LINK to see the swell graphs, that's the way these things work... Ready? Set??? GO!!!

Now here are a few observations about the Popcorn Machine material from me to you:

A. The first half played reasonably evenly up to the 7-0 Blazer run in the last 2:30 of the 2nd Quarter. LMA was the big honcho in that spurt.

B. In the second half, the Blazers cracked it wide open and Detroit never really threatened. They melted like a sugar cube in a truck stop urinal, opening the 3rd Q on the stinky side of a 16-7 run. Third Quarter hero was Nic Batum, scoring 9 of his 17 points.

C. "Give Me the Ball" Roy played about 21 minutes, scoring 11 points. Fortunately Rudy was ready to pick up the slack. (Am I the only one who notices he seems to play MUCH better in the Rose Garden than he does on the road?) Rudy finished with 13 points in just under 27 minutes of play. That's right, sports fans, Rudy played more minutes than Brandon.

D. Dante Cunningham had a 10 point quarter, playing all of the 4th.

 

 

 

Finally, let's gather round for another installment of THE GREATEST THING IN THE WORLD, eh?

Tbjlogo_medium

In case you missed it, here's Tuesday's show... Naughty word alert, per usual. They're back to swearing this year.

 

The Basketball Jones is a NBA blog and video/audio podcast, written and recorded five times a week by J.E. Skeets, Tas Melas, Jason Doyle and Matt Osten. Assume that there will be a couple Not Suitable For Work words used in any given episode.

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