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Hedgehog's Dilemma Junk - venti e ventuno november 2010

So how do you write a letter to someone you think is going to want to kill you.

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Bridge Over Troubled Water (Live at Pearl's)- Eva Cassidy (via Joner888)

 

I have this letter I need to write. The person is someone that I've lied to in the past, who has told me threatened me to leave in the past, and, yet, I need to contact this person now. Since I've talked to him last, his life has fallen apart.. family has left him and he's facing severe legal issues. This isn't why I need to talk to him, really. I need to talk to him because I suspect one day that he will want to kill me when he discovers the truth.. and is maybe crazy enough to do it. And since I can't walk away, it seems like a good time to attempt to reach out. 

It's definitely not a typical hedgehog's dilemma, but it reflects the same basic principle. We generally live our lives guided by a sense of moderation because despite a need to find closeness with others, we don't want to get hurt or to hurt others. The more we let fear of that hurt alter us, the less able we become to find true closeness. To truly be ourselves. 

Finally, any advice on my situation (that I will follow)?  I am considering getting a P.O. box before I write. How much risk of pain is worth to make a gesture of openness? 

two clips better than one

Guns N' Roses - November Rain (via GunsNRosesVEVO)

Updated at 1:22pm

What should I do? Should I admit I made mistakes? Should I remind him I’ve lied to him before? What should I do?

Should I tell him how important this is? Should I really believe I have no chance to make it up? What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?

Should I get hide behind my words? Want to meet someone that you hate? Should I just go out there?

Should I tell him I am not going anywhere? Should I tell him I’m a chaser of big dreams?

Should I accept my role as "The Predator"? 

Maybe I should just… disappear?

Should I stop listening to my heart? it's my heart. Should I take up shooting? Should I throw my heart on the line?

Should we just he the reset? Start over? What should I do? Should I be who he wants me to be?