Behind Enemy Lines

by RipCityRoyCity on Apr 9, 2009 7:50 PM PDT

For the past few years I have been attending a private University in eastern Idaho located a few short hours from Salt Lake City. You guessed it this is Jazz country. I can’t stand the undeserved sense of accomplishment that Jazz fans have. First of all your name doesn’t match the city you live in, secondly you have probably the lousiest fan base in America (IE chanting Cancer to Derek Fisher). The reason I bring this up is that for the past few years I have had to endure constant harassment from these so called loyalists who, if I remember correctly dropped the team flat on it’s face after Stockton and Malone peaced out. Even now their support is spotty at best, I went to a game as part of a career fair about two months ago and the place was literally half empty, but since Mormons (Jazz fans) are overly optimistic people they would probably argue that it is half full. Now I know what you are thinking about the Mormon comment but I actually am a “Mormon” as well and I have to say sometimes they can be so ridiculous (like rooting for the Jazz). But I digress; the fact of the matter is; now I finally have something to say back to them.

The following is an actual argument that took place in front of a Dairy Queen approximately 3 hours ago.

(As I leave my car and head into the restaurant I ran into a friend of mine who took it upon herself to talk a little trash to me after the Utah Jazz started out the season 5-0, from there on out you had to know this would be war I would not stand idly by and have my fan hood endure such mockery)

Me: (wearing my old school Steve Smith jersey… laundry day) Hey how about those Jazz huh? Hope you guys enjoy the 8th seed and losing to the Lakers in the first round.

Jazz fan that thinks we are friends and is actually from Virginia but happens to be a Jazz fan because her boyfriend is: Well uh uh. What is that a child size small Martell Webster jersey?

Me: No actually it is my vintage Steve Smith jersey that I have had since high school.

Poser Jazz fan: Oh I was just wondering.

Me: it’s ok I would be in a bad mood too if my team couldn’t win on the road.

Jazz fan again: All I have to say is Sam Bowie, Darius Miles, and the latest Greg Oden.

Me: funny you would mention Greg Oden who actually leads the league in offensive rebounds in his rookie season, and how many rings do the Jazz have again….?

Jazz fan: (silence)

My point is that many of you probably encounter conversations like this every day, well I want to give you a chance to vent in the comments below lets share our best “Behind Enemy Lines” story. I don’t want this thread to turn into a religious debate I have already told some Mormons that they are wrong a on few things, being Jazz fans for one, I mean don’t the realize that Brigham Young was a Trail Blazer?

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Comments

This just makes me think

of when Celtic and L*ker fans pull out the “rings” card.

by T$ 225 on Apr 9, 2009 8:17 PM PDT reply actions

Yeah but it is one thing we have that they don't

that and a future.

by RipCityRoyCity on Apr 9, 2009 8:23 PM PDT up reply actions

Wore my Blazer Hoodie to torts class

got a good natured “one-finger salute” from my buddy Abel. Spent time with the Mavs fans congratulating each other’s wins.

Blazer's fan since '84, Spurs fan when they are not playing Portland.

↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A B A START.

by HurraKane212 on Apr 9, 2009 10:40 PM PDT reply actions

When ever someone mentions Bowie to me I say this:

Why the {expletive delete} should I care about Bowie? I wasn’t a fan of the NBA then and didn’t become a fan until after Jordan retired the second time. Then if they say, “Well what bout Darius or Oden?” Then I say, “Well what about them?” And when they try to answer, because they don’t know what they are talking about, I say, “Why don’t you pull your head out of your {expletive deleted}, do a little research, and get back to me you ignorant {expletive deleted}.”

I’m living in the now and when I have to deal with a dummy who’s trying to antagonize me, I like to flip it around and make it personal. A lot of fans that throw out Bowie have never seen Jordan or Bowie play and they deserve to be punched in the privates.

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by tominhawaii on Apr 10, 2009 5:49 AM PDT reply actions