What to do with the Yellow Mamba

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 5:48 AM PDT

After my poll about how awesome Brandon Roy's nickname is to BE readers, I think it's definitively NOT AWESOME.

Or is it....?

Quick's latest Behind the Locker Room write up after the Denver game revealed that Brandon, in spite of a massive rejections by fans, says that Yellow Mamba is here to stay.

How Portland is this! He's basically saying, "Screw conventional wisdom. I like it, so I'm doing it." Sure, it doesn't roll off the tongue very well, pays homage to the most hated player in the NBA, and is based around a fictional snake, but you know what? If Brandon Roy likes it, I like it.

Think of it like an ironic mustache. At first, it seems silly, but then it slowly becomes cool. Let's get behind this Yellow Mamba thing, and take it from arguably the worst nickname imaginable to a household name.

Tweet Comment 49 comments | 1 recs |

Do you like this story?

Comments

I like your anti Kobe sentiments. I agree that we as fans should come up with something better and give B-Roy our own cool nickname, however when someone does let me know. I will continue referring to him as B-Roy since ‘yellow mamba’ is just too darn unoriginal. Couldn’t he even be yellow sour patch kid? Yellow SPK. He’s hella sweet if he’s on your team, but leaves a bad taste in everyone else’s mouth with his awesome play.

Not like the Utah Jazz... it's about REAL jazz. Go Dawgs, Go Blazers!

by jazzaholic17 on Apr 17, 2009 6:08 AM PDT reply actions

It's a stupid, unoriginal moniker that isn't only mildly offensive, but also demeaning in that it makes him ...

seem like a poor man’s Kobe Bryant. Yet, if he’s adamently stubborn enough to stick with it and push that as his nickname, then so be it. Regardless, we still maintain the right to deem the “Yellow Mamba” as one of the dumbest, most unflattering nicknames in the NBA.

by AK1984 on Apr 17, 2009 6:16 AM PDT reply actions

Have to agree

This nickname is actually impressive in that it fails spectacularly on so many levels. In terms of being awful, it really brings a lot to the table. I’m not sure it could possibly be topped.

At the same time, it manages to be unoriginal, offensive, weak, derivative, complimentary of a huge rival, subservient to the same rival, fictional, cartoonish, and just plain dumb.

It has negative swag. Needless to say, I blame Travis.

We cannot let this horribleness spread. Gag order on yellow mamba. If it becomes popularly known, let Blazers Edge play no role.

Q: Is Greg favoring his knee?
Frye: He favors dunking on your head, that's what he favors.

by KP Corleone on Apr 17, 2009 6:53 AM PDT up reply actions

exactly

This nickname is actually impressive in that it fails spectacularly on so many levels.

like steven segal. so bad it’s good!

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 7:54 AM PDT up reply actions

will someone explain to me in what way is it offensive

because its related to a Laker?

by GreatOden'sRaven on Apr 17, 2009 12:16 PM PDT up reply actions

This part I disagree with:

Yet, if he’s adamently stubborn enough to stick with it and push that as his nickname, then so be it.

Brandon Roy is a phenomenal basketball player with ice in his veins, but he is apparently really, really, really bad at nicknames. Jordan was a great basketball player and a wonderful self-promoter; Brandon is a great basketball player but a wonderfully bad self-promoter. It’s part of his charm.

We owe it to him to protect him – do not spread this nonsense.

Q: Is Greg favoring his knee?
Frye: He favors dunking on your head, that's what he favors.

by KP Corleone on Apr 17, 2009 7:20 AM PDT up reply actions

While I surely won't "spread this nonsense," it's not my duty "to protect him" from his own idiocy.

Anyhow, Travis Outlaw has cemented that he doesn’t only have a low basketball IQ, but also a low IQ in general. Anybody who coins the nickname of “Yellow Mamba” for Brandon Roy is out of their gourd.

by AK1984 on Apr 17, 2009 7:46 AM PDT up reply actions

I love Roy, but...

…you are oh so right. Horrible nickname. Absolutely horrible.

by antediluvian on Apr 17, 2009 11:24 AM PDT up reply actions

We create one. And Roy starts to wear Nike Zoom Roy IV Venom shoes - with red swoosh and laces

Greg Oden = Robert Parish (HOF, 4x NBA champion, 9x NBA All-Star). The only other rookie with more than 500 points, 400 rebounds, and 65 blocks in under 1400 minutes played. Since 1946.

by Norsktroll on Apr 17, 2009 6:27 AM PDT reply actions

Maybe Brandon secretly wants to be a Laker...

Pontiff of the Pryz for Prez Posse...

by timbo on Apr 17, 2009 10:04 AM PDT up reply actions

Unrec

I get what you’re trying to do – unconditional support for B-Roy – but I cannot support what is literally the worst nickname I have ever heard in my entire life. The nickname should never, ever be used.

Lots of people read this website. It wouldn’t be good for America for Brandon Roy to popularly become known as Yellow Mamba.

The idea that one of the best young players in the league would name himself after a weak-sounding, made-up, offensive, derivative snake is competely baffling.

Worst. Nickname. Ever.

Q: Is Greg favoring his knee?
Frye: He favors dunking on your head, that's what he favors.

by KP Corleone on Apr 17, 2009 6:44 AM PDT reply actions

While there is unconditional support for B-Roy involved

it’s more about taking something that sucks really really bad, and making it hip.

More examples: those t shirts with animals on them like the dude from flight of the conchords. Sideburns. Flip Flops. Visors. Lil’ Wayne.

We gotta get on this thing and make it awesome before everybody else catches what’s going on.

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 7:58 AM PDT up reply actions

See, I detest that hipster mentality. Rather than jump on the bandwagon solely for the purpose ...

of conforming with the norm, I’d prefer to squash this absurd nickname by ranting about the stupidity behind it.

by AK1984 on Apr 17, 2009 8:01 AM PDT up reply actions

it's the opposite

instead of losing the yellow mamba because everybody wouldn’t like it, we could embrace the hell out of it and make it the nickname of the century. Then, when others roll in and say “yellow mamba? are you serious?” you can reply, “Actually, dude, yellow mamba is awesome because The Yellow Mamba is awesome.”

no one will see it coming.

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 8:24 AM PDT up reply actions

Black Mamba bites have a 100% fatality rate without antivenom

That said, there is antivenom available, and with it, people simply don’t die from Black Mamba bites anymore.

There is NO antivenom for yellow mamba bites… mwa ha ha

by Zaig on Apr 17, 2009 8:26 AM PDT up reply actions

(Ask Samb)

by Zaig on Apr 17, 2009 8:26 AM PDT up reply actions

or the rockets when they're in portland

it’s a quick, fatal strike. Take about 0.8 seconds.

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 9:38 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs

+1

by Zaig on Apr 17, 2009 8:24 AM PDT up reply actions

and, i would like to add

That B-Roy, while tasteful and popular, sucks for a nickname too. First letter followed by first syllable lost in the WCF with the Kings.

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 8:00 AM PDT up reply actions

Y'know, I don't mind average, garden-variety nicknames like "B-Roy" and whatnot. Heck, in my ...

personal opinion, I’d go with “Brando” or something simple like that. In any case, though, anything is better than that ridiculous “Yellow Mamba” rubbish.

by AK1984 on Apr 17, 2009 8:06 AM PDT up reply actions

Brando isn't bad - but he needs jowels.

and as dumb as the yellow mamba is, i have to give him credit for taking being more original than B Roy.

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 8:21 AM PDT up reply actions

i agree

i hate all forms of it as well

s-jax
d-wade
d-how
etc
yuck

by GreatOden'sRaven on Apr 17, 2009 12:24 PM PDT up reply actions

Garbage can

Blazer Fan

by leeroyjenkins on Apr 17, 2009 6:47 AM PDT reply actions

This is just Brandon and Travis messing with Quick!!

Yellow Mamba is the lamest, stupidest nickname ever conceived. “Yellow” has NEVER been associated with anyone or anything cool. EVER.
-This is good-natured backlash for Quick’s-albeit entertaining—borderline, invasive Locker Room series of articles.
-Self-imposed nicknames are rarely good, with a few notable exceptions.

Please stop the madness.

It's spelled "PRZYBILLA."
vanillathrillagorillaprzybilla

by RenoBlazerFan on Apr 17, 2009 7:33 AM PDT reply actions

This is just Brandon and Travis messing with Quick!!

1. Yellow Mamba is the lamest, stupidest nickname ever conceived. “Yellow” has NEVER been associated with anyone or anything cool. EVER.
2. This is good-natured backlash for Quick’s—albeit entertaining—borderline invasive Locker Room series of articles.
3. Self-imposed nicknames are rarely good, with a few notable exceptions.

Please stop the madness, and I will vow to use the Preview function more often.

It's spelled "PRZYBILLA."
vanillathrillagorillaprzybilla

by RenoBlazerFan on Apr 17, 2009 7:37 AM PDT reply actions

What about "Apollo 7" ?

If Brandon does well against Houston, that could do it. There’s the idea of uprising and ignition too. Apollo 7 was the first american mission that took a team to space, so there’s the idea of unselfishness

by chuky on Apr 17, 2009 9:17 AM PDT reply actions

or apollo creed

now that’s a nick i could get behind

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 9:36 AM PDT up reply actions

or the destROYer

Ok It’s not great but geez louise, “Yellow” mamba? Makes me vomit a little bit…

by ExpatDan on Apr 17, 2009 9:44 AM PDT up reply actions

That'd definitely be better than ...

the Challenger for obvious reasons.

by AK1984 on Apr 17, 2009 9:49 AM PDT up reply actions

Ouch

by Zaig on Apr 17, 2009 11:49 AM PDT up reply actions

I googled yellow mamba...

to see if it was an actual reptile. No luck there but I found this…

http://forums.lakersground.net/viewtopic.php?t=85060&start=0

When you say “yellow mamba” really fast it just sorta sounds like “yo’ momma”. Maybe he should shorten it to that.

The cowards never started
The weak died along the way
Only the strong survived
They were the Trailblazers

by lukeyhere on Apr 17, 2009 9:25 AM PDT reply actions

Haha

The fools, they are taking it seriously. More misguided arrogance from Lakerland.

"Sasha? That's a sissy name." -Mike Rice

by koyote on Apr 17, 2009 10:24 AM PDT up reply actions

In fairness

If you don’t know the history of the Quick articles, you wouldn’t pick up on this being a joke.

And I’ll be honest, I’d never heard that Kobe’s newest nickname was black mamba until this came out. Kobe is just ripping off of Kill Bill anyway.

by Zaig on Apr 17, 2009 11:52 AM PDT up reply actions

I still think it´s a inside joke

by Falcao on Apr 17, 2009 9:46 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs

If it's an inside joke, then my sarcasm meter is on the fritz.

by AK1984 on Apr 17, 2009 9:51 AM PDT up reply actions

Mamba Killer, Brandon "The Mongoose" Roy

Remember the funny cars the Snake and the Mongoose? Heck they even have their own custom Hot Wheels!

by Merlyn on Apr 17, 2009 10:22 AM PDT reply actions

I remember the Mongoose...

as the really cool bike that every kid wanted. Couldn’t afford it and rode around on my banana seat Sears model. This was back when movies like “Rad” were, umm, rad.

The cowards never started
The weak died along the way
Only the strong survived
They were the Trailblazers

by lukeyhere on Apr 17, 2009 10:32 AM PDT up reply actions

Riki Tiki Tavi

is my recollection of Mongooses

Snake killers

Support families in crisis in Portland www.give10tell10.org

by PDXBuckeye on Apr 17, 2009 11:57 AM PDT up reply actions

Is Roy doin' this...

to get in Kobe’s head?

Roys swag is through the roof right now… he’s been jawwing on the court, and he and Kobe were even jousting for position on an inbound play before the ball was thrown in during the last game.

maybe this is Roy really trying to put the voodoo on Kobe.

But I like to be here. Oh, I like it a lot! Said the Cat in the Hat. To the fish in the pot.

by you'vegottomakeyourfreethrows on Apr 17, 2009 10:37 AM PDT reply actions

That was one of my thoughts when I first heard it

It would be pretty sure someone tells Kobe about it, and when he and Roy start talking about it on the floor Kobe is not really focused. Although when Artest tried to trash talk with him this season that went really wrong for the Rockets.

Greg Oden = Robert Parish (HOF, 4x NBA champion, 9x NBA All-Star). The only other rookie with more than 500 points, 400 rebounds, and 65 blocks in under 1400 minutes played. Since 1946.

by Norsktroll on Apr 17, 2009 11:14 AM PDT up reply actions

I have always like "The Natural"

#10 Pryzbilla the Vanilla Gorilla

by Hookah_John on Apr 17, 2009 10:48 AM PDT reply actions

What?! Seriously? Why yellow? Why try to bank off someone else's stupid nickname? Brandon, please say it aint so!

Maybe all of our guys should have variations on other players nicknames. Let’s see……
1. Greg Oden- the not quite as big aristotle.
2. Steve Blake- Mr. large shot
3. Joel Przybilla – the great white host
4. Lamarcus Aldridge- the huge ticket
5. Martell Webster- big shot Marty
Can’t think of anymore right now.

by dario argento on Apr 17, 2009 11:13 AM PDT reply actions

Prince Roy...

by antediluvian on Apr 17, 2009 11:28 AM PDT up reply actions

IMO

Yellow Mamba is awesome just because it’s so ridiculous. hopefully used strictly in mockery of future L*ker defeats. the Natural will always be the nickname that comes…well, “naturally.”

UDOKA!

by CLRNCE. on Apr 17, 2009 11:59 AM PDT reply actions

exactly

couldn’t be worse, so i’m forced to embrace it.

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 8:53 PM PDT up reply actions

Yellow Mamba is just there to mock Kobe

Especially after he totally froze up in crunch time last game.

by staylost on Apr 17, 2009 12:05 PM PDT reply actions

A defense of the concept of 'Yellow Mamba', ...

although I won’t call him that.

I think it is funny and subversive of him and Travis.
(a) They know that we are eating up the “Behind the Locker Room Door” stuff.
(b) they know we aren’t too keen on Kobe.
© They know there is a good chance of this going national because it’s a playoff-time poke at Kobe’s self proclaimed nickname (and can’t we agree that self proclaimed nicknames only work for Muhammad Ali?).

So they come up with this crazy nickname that has a slight racial component (Quick: “Why yellow?” Roy: “My skin.” Wikipedia “high yellow” for more information on that.). Then when Quick tells them it isn’t playing well, Brandon says he’s sticking with it. Hilarious! This shows me that there is a joker streak in Brandon’s All-American personality and Outlaw brings it out in him.

For me lately, Brandon conjures up classic images of the super hero, Captain America. Captain Portland. Captain PDX. The Captain. Captain Crunch. Captain Clutch…

by lama on Apr 17, 2009 2:57 PM PDT reply actions

this is the best case scenario

but there’s a lt of things that have to go right for this to work

Yellow Mamba FTW!

by northwestj on Apr 17, 2009 8:55 PM PDT up reply actions

It's already worked with me!

The absurdity of Kobe calling himself “Black Mamba” – to the point of integrating a snake into his own personal logo! – makes me laugh as I think of it. “Black Mamba” screams marketing think-tank: "Mr. Bryant, your legal trouble in Colorado has dried up some of your revenue streams. We at Acme Branding think you need an image makeover. Something with street cred. Something that says, “I’m not Michael Jordan. I’m a deadly reptile that bites with really pointy teeth. Did I mention that I am not Michael Jordan? That something is… [wait for it…] ‘Black Mamba’!”

In four years on a mid-January evening, Portland will be down 8 with 2 minutes to go to the Bucks. Brandon will go on a five-point, one-steal, two-assist tear to pull out the victory. I will proclaim loudly, “Go Yellow Mamba Go!!!” And I will laugh heartily.

by lama on Apr 17, 2009 11:25 PM PDT up reply actions