There was a quick 4 second clip last Sunday(Feb. 15) of Blaze putting pie in the face of a fan. I was curious so I used my dvr to show it in slow-mo. The young unsuspecting woman;s ‘crime’ may have been that her sweatshirt had a about 4 inch Kings logo on the belly. The Blazers were not playing the Kings. To get the pie in her face, Blaze held her right shoulder with his left hand while smacking her in the face with the pie tin. This knocked her uncontrollably into her seat as she reached with her left to pull the tin out of her face. You can see she was knocked into her seat (not simply sitting down) because you see her body bounce up and down in the seat at least twice. Then she immediately has to open her mouth to breathe because the pie had drenched her so thoroughly she could no longer breathe through the nose.

I consider this no less a crime than punching them in the face without the pie and pie tin. But worse because it was done for a voyeuristic crime effect, solely done for the purpose of capturing the crime on media for the supposed pleasure of viewers… like a snuff film.

Aside from being an assault. It is stupid, not funny and undeserved. That fan could very well have been a Blazer fan. I wear clothes of logos all the time that I’m not a fan of. I buy them because I need the type of clothing and its cheap at the good will. I have a Wisconsin sweatshirt and a lacrosse jersey for a eastern College team. I’m not a fan of either and don’t care for lacrosse.

Even if she was not a Blazer fan. Is that anyway to treat a paying guest? Would they like if the ever growing number of Blazer fans that go to away games were treated like that?

It’s supposed to be funny because we’ve all seen it done in films. I’ve got news. The films are staged. They are not reality. Films do things like carefully staged special effects but only idiots would try to duplicate in real life.

Films also do things when they think are funny but no one in the audience does. Remember that long run of films that had a chase scene where a fruit stand got smashed? For years producers/directors thought they had to put this in because they thought the audience thought it was funny. It took someone to speak up and question one of them on it before the industry learned that no one in the audience thought it was funny, it was really LAME.

The same holds here. The Blazers think they are doing something funny but it is LAME. But even worse them LAME, worse than badly treating a guest , Blazer fan or not. it is assault which is a crime. It is no less a crime because lame movie producers have staged such events thinking the audience would find it entertaining.

When I used to go to games in the nineties, the Blazers would obviously stage events where a supposed ‘fan’ of the opposite team in the audience would get the butt end of a joke. But there was never any doubt the ‘fan’ was an acting out a role, and I don’t think that they were ever subjected to a surprise knock down punch in the face.

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Update....   The moment you've been waiting for has arrived. As promised I called the Blazers to see if I could wring out a confession from Jail Blaze the Criminal Cat. But I was thwarted by one of his co-conspirator flappers.   Warning: this conversation may not be suitable for all audiences because 1/2 of it is 'staged'.  It went loosely like this.

       Mr. Wonderfulone: "Are the depictions of criminal assault by Blaze staged?"

      Blaze lackey:  "They usually are."

       Mr. Wonderfulone: "How does he select his victims?"

      Blaze lackey:   "The last one was one of our employees."

       Mr. Wonderfulone:  "I saw Jail Blaze assault a young woman in a Kings jersey at the Kings game a week ago Sunday." 

      Blaze lackey:   "What?!"

    Mr. Wonderfulone: "Yea. It was done under the cover of a valentines day celebration."

      Blaze lackey: "Oh you mean the Thunder game on Wednesday the 11th. That was one of our employees."

     Mr. Wonderfulone:  "Whatever...   Could you tell Blaze to meet me and 'BigMacAttackin' in the alley before the next game?'

      Blaze lackey:  "He never leaves the Rose Garden in costume."

    Mr. Wondefulone:  "He must have learned that from too many fans trying to pound sand in is *ss.   I got a furry stuffed cat named "fluffy".  She sexy in a stuffed animal kind of way. I'm bringing her to the next game.  I think she could lure Blaze into the alley.  Me and "BigMacAttackin" got scores to settle. 'BigMacAttackin' is going to poor popcorn on his head while we rub butter and kernals into his fir.  Then I'm going to have to cut him becuase I think staged violence is criminal."

      Blaze lackey:   "He sucks. I'll bring a case of silly string. "