A modest proposal: Fire Mike Rice and Antonio Harvey!
(I originally posted this in the "Rebecca Haarlow" thread, but I had some typos to correct and, well, after reading it I'm sure most will agree that it "should've been a fanshot")
Hey, if the Blazers really want to save some money, they should rotate Batum, Outlaw, Pendergraph and Mills as color commentators alongside Barrett and Wheeler. Those injured players are just sitting there doing nothing during the games, anyway--so put 'em to work...on the air!
Just in case you were wondering...there is a precedent for this from Blazer history. Back in ‘74-'75 when Walton was often hurt and always annoying, Lenny Wilkens told him to "leave the bench area!" and go sit next to the Schonz. Dollar Bill put a radio headset on and started commenting on the game action—and a broadcasting career was born! Now, are you going to tell me that Travis Outlaw can’t do a less "horrrible" job behind the mic than Bill Walton? Nico Suave already has some parlez vous francais TV experience from the all-star game weekend, and Patty Mills has that Aussie accent and a face made for radio. By all accounts Jeff Pendergraph is well-spoken, and the Blazers could even do a "sounds of the game" segment with Dante Cunningham wearing the hidden mic on the bench and inside the huddle! (C'mon now, who doesn't want to "accidentally" overhear what Brandon and LMA are grumbling about, as they're watching the lead slip away?)
I firmly believe that a huge opportunity is being wasted, here—and I thought that those wise guys over at Blazer broadcasting were innovators? All that’s standing in the way of this new-wave in cutting-edge NBA commentary is a senile TV color guy and a blockhead ex-jock radio analyst—both of whom are just hanging on and contributing so little to the overall fan experience!
So, cut out the deadwood! Downsize. Show 'em the door! Don't we all want to hear more of Travis screaming "Oh my, ’dere go da game!!!" when Rudy drops in a last-second, game-winning bucket? And, who knows? Perhaps #25's exclamation of unbridled joy could eventually become the new signature "happy ending" slogan for Portland victories, replacing Wheeler’s "...it’s a great day to be a Blazer" and the Schonz’ "Rrrrip city baby, all right!" We're talking T-shirts. Bumper stickers. Toy basketballs. The marketing possibilities are endless!
So now, it's time to kick those old dogs over to the curb...and release the hounds!
about 2 years ago
two4larue
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I thought this was a bit rediculous at first
But, it really would be very interesting listening to some of the guys who arent in the huddle speaking their mind. I dont think you necessarily need to fire anyone, but you could bring em over at different times.
Nate might say they need to pay attention to the game but no reason they wouldnt keep watching the game. Definately a good idea in my opinion.
Portland could coast along with their superior talent and stay right with us. Now that Portland woke up, the hammer cometh down.
I new we should of kept Frye for this very reason.
Trade players for picks and draft Cole Aldrich 2010
I enjoyed the read
But Rice has grown on me. He use to annoy me, but I find him hilarious at times. Who cares if he’s a homer, he’s just the color guy.
I could absolutely do without Harvey though.
Witty Unpredictable Talent and Natural Game
I think the Mikes are at an all time low this season so far, and I have so say even Mike Barrett is annoying me. It seems like everything he says is really melodramatic. Example: Other team scores two points… “MB: And SUDDENLY/JUST LIKE THAT the Blazer lead is cut to 12!”
and were always underdogs
Please, for the love of all that is holy, please stop using the following: "Book it.", "FTW", "Epic" & "Fail".
...no seriously--stop.
ts always bad for pdx that other teams suffer injuries bc blazer killer 10th men get subbed in
Please, for the love of all that is holy, please stop using the following: "Book it.", "FTW", "Epic" & "Fail".
...no seriously--stop.
Bring in a couple of injured players
for half a quarter during each home game. It would give Rice a chance to go get something to drink or something.
"Woulda, Coulda, Mighta and Shoulda – the Four Horsemen of the Procrastocalypse" - Red-5
I'm counting on mother nature to take care of that guy
by tominhawaii on Nov 20, 2009 6:55 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
hahahahaha :)
...and that's a good thing
by In Walks Rudy on Nov 21, 2009 8:23 AM PST up reply actions
Schonz
derived from Schonely.
Get it right. ;)
An offensive rebound in paragraph form. -Mr. Golliver
by you'vegottomakeyourfreethrows on Nov 20, 2009 9:05 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Overboard.
Just eat their babies.
*Unless KP has a secret plan that makes this statement incorrect.
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Ah, an English lit major?
I was wondering if anyone would catch the reference…there’s no way I can remain as “detached” as Jonathan Swift
When reached 40 years of following Portland basketball you have, be as passionate of the Trail Blazers you will not!
A true English Lit major would reference the Drapier’s Letters, and suggest we use only the finest Oregon wool in our unis.
"I could have done with other loves perhaps. But there it is, either you love or you don't" -SB
by nightbluefruit on Nov 23, 2009 10:52 PM PST up reply actions
I'm a computer science major and I got the reference.
Just sayin’.
You can measure skill and talent with your eyes, but productivity is shown through statistics.
Dripping with sauce
"you rock, sir" -prezofdeath
"You can add me to the list of those who think you rock" -Mortimer
"you rock
see above" -Zaron5551
"you still rock, sir." -Zaron5551
"dear sir: you rock" -austinpwnz
Instead of firing Mike Rice, we should hire him as Head Coach!!!
by broyposse on Nov 20, 2009 7:36 AM PST reply actions 2 recs
Can you imagine the technicals!?!?!?!
Rasheed Walace would bow to his superior!
"A bizarre and extremely rare hybrid Blazer/Laker fan, Timbo has always struggled to contain the Beast Within, like Dr. Jekyll, Bruce Banner, or Ted Kennedy." — Miled Animal
I love the Idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111
C*mcast sucks!
by Blazermaniac77 on Nov 21, 2009 12:41 PM PST up reply actions
I could do without 'tone
An offensive rebound in paragraph form. -Mr. Golliver
by you'vegottomakeyourfreethrows on Nov 20, 2009 9:06 AM PST reply actions
Rice must stay
I love the fool, I really do.
Harvey on the other hand, meh.
"Good evening Blazer fans, wherever you may be!"-Bill Schonely
Mike Rice called Pau Gasol's run "Gay"
And for that I am forever indebted to him. He stays with us until the wheels fall off!!!
Go Blazers!!!!!
Unrec
I’m all for having players join the broadcast team, but I’ll be damned if I’m gonna stand by and be silent while people call for Mike Rice to be fired. Every 6 months or so this comes up and it ticks me off to no end. Yes, he is often mispronounces names, is a huge homer, and possibly under the influence, but that all adds up to his goofy charm. Maybe you don’t want a guy who is so loyal to the team that he has been ejected from games, makes bets to shave his head at age 80, and calls out players for being punks and floppers, but I do. What I love most about Rice is that he gets under people’s skin who are rooting for the Blazer’s opponent. Rice is awesome and I hope he stays with the Blazers for many years to come.
"I been ridin' the midnight train, got ice water in my veins." -Bob Dylan
"Sasha? That's a sissy name." -Mike Rice
by koyote on Nov 20, 2009 9:34 AM PST reply actions 12 recs
I love Mike and Mike
Everyone who says fire Mike Rice should be forced to watch NBA league pass for a week and hear what other teams’ fans have to put up with. Seriously, Mike Rice is genuinely funny and he loves the game. Other announcers are always trying to come up with catch phrases and stupid crap like that because they are trying to make a name for themselves. Has anyone ever heard that Kings announcer? I swear he says the phrase “If you don’t like that, you don’t like NBA basketball!” every single game. Wow, what a great catch phrase. You might as well just shout “The NBA, where caring happens!”
ya and everyone complainin of their team in minnesota should look at the nets!
Please, for the love of all that is holy, please stop using the following: "Book it.", "FTW", "Epic" & "Fail".
...no seriously--stop.
Oh wait...
A modest proposal. So it’s all just a big joke. Fine! but other commentators really do suck. A lot. Plus Mike Rice gave me my name.
google the word "satire"
This post was inspired by the Blazer’s cost-cutting move in reducing Rebecca Haalow’s role to cover home games only. It was meant to be over the top and tongue in cheek. Mike and ’Tone’s jobs are safe and out of range of the falling axe…for now.
When reached 40 years of following Portland basketball you have, be as passionate of the Trail Blazers you will not!
My apologies
I don’t have time to read every post, so I wasn’t sure whether this was a joke or not. The Mike Rice haters bug me.
"I been ridin' the midnight train, got ice water in my veins." -Bob Dylan
"Sasha? That's a sissy name." -Mike Rice
but u have time to comment on something u didnt have time to read...things that make you go hmmm
Please, for the love of all that is holy, please stop using the following: "Book it.", "FTW", "Epic" & "Fail".
...no seriously--stop.
by nima on Nov 20, 2009 4:57 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
I read it, just wasn't clear as to it's motive
"I been ridin' the midnight train, got ice water in my veins." -Bob Dylan
"Sasha? That's a sissy name." -Mike Rice
and I don't think you read my comment that you commented on either
"I been ridin' the midnight train, got ice water in my veins." -Bob Dylan
"Sasha? That's a sissy name." -Mike Rice
Strong disagree
I love love love love love Mike Rice. Ton sucks, to me. But Ricey is the heart and soul of the broadcasting team. Do you know how long he has been with the club???!!!! The guy is classic, he has great basketball knowledge, his eccentricities tend to turn people off at first (read new Blazers fans) but the more you listen to him the more he grows on you. I have been listening to him for years and I can think of few things more upsetting to me than the idea that he would be removed from his position as color analyst. Sorry, but your suggestion is not well-taken from me.
Your post makes me glad
that I don’t have a job where I have to listen to blowhards call for my head all the time
I totally agree that Outlaw should be in front of the microphone, though. I enjoy every second of every one of his post-game interviews.
Two points scored by GO’ = "thunderdunk"
you and me both
but I would hope that Mike and Tone would get a chuckle out of this, if they were ever to read it
Catfish on the air, who knows? He could become the NBA’s version of Dizzy Dean
When reached 40 years of following Portland basketball you have, be as passionate of the Trail Blazers you will not!
I LOVE Travis' voice too.
*Unless KP has a secret plan that makes this statement incorrect.
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How about 'Catfish' as sideline reporter?
and MB saying, “Let’s kick it down to Catfish”. I think it would be awesome having TO do the sideline report/interviews. Can you imagine the smiles from the Blazer players and Coach Nate when TO interviews them? I bet it would be a riot!
"Do me a favor. Put your lip over your head... and swallow." Max Goldman
by clinchmobb on Nov 20, 2009 3:30 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
Good idea, although I'd vote for Batum
Based on some of things he say on his interviews, (plus his not quite fluent English) I think Batum has the best chance to ask what fans are actually thinking at the time..such as:
“So coach, Howard was really really stinks last quarter, but why keep playing him?” (Or something like that…I’m not good at imitating French people speaking bad English)
Even if some people disagree about firing:
I think we can all agree that it was a good laugh.
--
by CaptainSexyJacob on Nov 21, 2009 4:39 PM PST reply actions
wheels and antonio harvey...goodbye
they have little to no insight…their jokes are no where in the same area code as funny…wheels should stick to pimping his gastric bypass…antonio should never be allowed on the radio ever again…let canzano and strong get involved with broadcasts…they try…they have insight…they don’t feed you old man jokes…
bayless...
is who should commentate…he’d say things like “if I were in there instead of steve…”
Nah, keep Rice!
“Keep Portland weird.”
If anyone fits that quote it’s Mike Rice.
He’s old school and has enough crazy old man in him to keep things light. That’s what a color commentator is supposed to do. Look at Charles Barkley. That guy says things nearly every TNT broadcast which raise eyebrows. But people enjoy him too because he says things that we’d all love to say on that show as a fan. Mike Rice does the same sort of stuff. He’s just older and so his way of entertaining feels unprofessional when it’s really just Rice being Rice. I love the guy. He has a wonderful personality.
Sometimes a player's greatest challenge is coming to grips with his role on the team.
-- Scottie Pippen
Mike Rice belongs in Memphis
With all the other people who should have retired years ago.
I just turn on the radio while wathcing the game live. Much better experience than listening to those two ignorant and oblivious old men jabber on about the refs all game.
MB’s response to the whole ‘homer’ situation was “Whose name is on our paychecks?”
Exactly. While I love my team, I don’t need to be told over and over about how we get screwed over every game.
"Tough times don't last. Tough people do."
-Chauncey Billups
keep mike rice, lose "talking ball"
“Talking Ball” is the most ridiculous show. I finally attempted to watch it the other night as I was huddled around chicken soup. It is three people drinking and talking about the game with a nervous moderator. Dwight James throws out his “my way or the highway” opinions in his condescending whiny voice. That show is a waste.
We really need a new radio team
Not having Comcast and having to rely on the radio broadcast, I understand that the blazers have never fouled, have never missed a basket without the refs missing a call, and that all other cities and fans are inferior. I’m all for having the announcers root for the Blazers and get excited, but lets stay grounded in reality.
Having the league pass, I’ve seen worse. Most notably the clowns in Boston. They are virtually unwatchable. But it would be nice to have something like the guys in Indiana. Quinn Buckner is a great analyst.
Of course it would be nice to be able to watch Blazer games instead of other NBA games too.
We have done this already a couple of times.
People forget about getting Greg in there a couple of different times when he was injured. The thing is Greg is the kind of person that could sit in and actually contribute to that position. You have to be witty and a quick thinker. The funniest thing to me was when they were asking Greg about putting on weight and he was talking about eating hotdogs on the bench. At the end of the interview he told Rice he was going to find that other half of his hotdog.
I had a class recently read Twain’s “The Damned Human Race” recently and they all voiced concern over how offensive the essay was to human beings.
"I could have done with other loves perhaps. But there it is, either you love or you don't" -SB
by nightbluefruit on Nov 23, 2009 10:55 PM PST reply actions
I remember reading "A Modest Proposal" back in college (early '80s)
And asked the prof. “Swift’s contemporaries knew he wasn’t being serious, right?”
Ahh, the naivete’ of youth…it’s something you rarely see nowadays—unless it’s on the chat page of your favorite pro team ;^)
When reached 40 years of following Portland basketball you have, be as passionate of the Trail Blazers you will not!
I understand Tone being fired. He is horrible. He tries way to hard, states obvious points, and is all around
an annoying voice to listen too.
Now about this Mike Rice business. I consider it unamerican to call for the firing of MIke Rice. How can you not love the guy? He is hilarious and he is a true die hard fan. He speaks for all the fans that can’t be heard. He represents the spirit of all Blazer fans. Mike Rice is a keeper. Him and Barrett have great chemistry and make the games entertaining to listen to.
If they fired Mike Rice I know the guy to replace him would never live up to the job. Unless it was Doug Collin but that will never happen.
by BRoyInThe4th on Nov 24, 2009 6:34 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
Rec: "I consider it unamerican to call for the firing of Mike Rice."
If someone wants to get on TV, that’s the sign. That should be someone’s signature.
Canzano might question your patriotism for not finding a way to capitalize “American” though.
Keep your expectations low and you won't be disappointed.
I loved Mike & Mike last night for the Chicago game. Noah is shooting free throws and Rice tries to toss in his analysis. “Noah is a good shooter here.” ..and Barrett is like “Actually Mike he’s shooitng 66% from the line right now.”
Owned.
Sometimes a player's greatest challenge is coming to grips with his role on the team.
-- Scottie Pippen
Mike Rice is our Bob Uecker.
Mike Rice should drink an additional beer before the broadcast.
Keep your expectations low and you won't be disappointed.
I agree about Antonio… whether you are serious or not, we can all agree that he is a bumbling fool. Wheels is annoying, but on top of things. Wheels passes off to Tone and he blathers for a few seconds like he was surprised he got a chance to speak. God I hate the radio crew… Mike Rice is ridiculously funny, good-spirited, and he called out everyone who said he was a homer the other night. Who else would do that… “Who signs our paychecks?”
Bring the bling to Rip City, Natch'
Trade John Canzano!
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