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I heard that Andre miller...


We've all been hearing a lot of things about Andre Miller.

Star-divide

BlazersFansince1970 made a fanpost stating the facts about the Andre/Nate situation.

But you know what? I don't care about the facts. I don't care about the truth, the truth won't entertain me until the regular season starts. I need some drama, I need some scandal...

I need some TRUTHINESS.

Colbert-truthiness_medium

 

via upload.wikimedia.org

Truthiness - a term used to describe things that a person claims to know intuitively or "from the gut" without regard to evidence, logic, intellectual examination, or facts.

 

I know that Miller's a bad man. I can feeeeel it... And I've heard things, bad things!

Some folks at Blazersedge commented in another post about some of the things they heard about Andre Miller. Well I and I'm pretty sure everyone else has heard a thing or two as well, so let's compile everything we've heard right here!

Just to get the ball rolling:

 

I heard that ...

... Miller rang Blake's front door bell and ran away.

... Miller drank the last cup of coffee and didn't brew another batch.

... Miller let out a silent one on the Blazer team bus, and when everyone was looking around wondering what the smell was he pointed over at coach Nate.

... Miller leaves the toilet seat up.

... Miller wears a Lakers jersey when he goes to sleep.

... Miller stole candy from a baby.

 

 

All must be true... my gut says so.

 

 

EDIT: Just want to make sure people don't misunderstand... even if all these are true I still like Andre Miller. Why? Because he's a BALLER.

19 recs  |  Comment 142 comments

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Comments

Display:

miller doesn't wash his hands after he uses the restroom

bayless leaves over my dead body
andre miller>hedo, blake
real.baller
R.A.M.B.O (do it nate, if you are smart)
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it (last years starting line-up) go. Let it go."

by thomasikehara on Oct 13, 2009 8:25 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Just close the lid

that way everyone has to lift something. It’s not heavy.

Things happen for a reason they say, but I say there's a reason things happen.

by sixth on Oct 14, 2009 6:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'd rather not handle it at all.

After all, accidents do happen. You just never know what you’re touching.
Up is the “safe, out of harms way” position.

by Berkeley on Oct 14, 2009 10:25 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

That, my friend,...

…is first class truthiness. The kind of truthiness you can only find on a blog site that allows anyone with an e-mail address and bad nickname to join and freely publish their thoughts. Thoughts the extreme left would be proud of. Well played, sir. Well played.

....formerly GonzoFan. Now, this has been a message from "The People's Alliance to Continue to Encourage Greg Oden on his Path to Dominance"

by bforsythe on Oct 13, 2009 8:49 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Fact

Andre kicked Charles Barkley McLovin (Greg’s dog).

"I love me some mountain man." – ratbastird

by Devenex on Oct 13, 2009 11:09 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

rofl

COMCAST SUCKS!!
"Let's win the playoffs!!!!!"- Rudy Fernandez

by shamman on Oct 13, 2009 9:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Nice.

My team went to the playoffs in my first year.

by pxilpooshr on Oct 13, 2009 10:24 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

and adds and H sound to the Will in

Will Wheaton

"OK, it's going to rain tomorrow. And there is going to be a Greenpeace meeting and hippies are going to be protesting" ~ The Buffet of Goodness on Portland

by Blazer on Oct 14, 2009 4:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Well, I heard he has a standing arrangement

with the postmaster in whatever city he plays for to read every letter addressed to “Santa at the North Pole” and buy that child one thing off their list.

by Montavilla Steve on Oct 13, 2009 9:49 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre refused to sign his autograph for my kid at the mall

… of course I don’t actually have a kid, but there’s just no excuse …

by nikolokolus on Oct 13, 2009 10:07 PM PDT reply actions   2 recs

Andre made Greg Oden cry

by telling him he’ll never play with Mike Conley again now that Miller, Blake and Bayless are here.

"I think he can still play" - Kevin Pritchard on Juwan Howard

by Norsktroll on Oct 13, 2009 10:48 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre calls Jeff Blake "Steve"

and laughs when Jeff cries about his missing puppy.

by Sashland on Oct 14, 2009 8:30 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Andre doesn't really believe this is "just a game"

He will be waiting for Trevor Ariza and John Canzano in the parking lot. Andre doesn’t like the media, or the L*kers, but his alter ego REALLY doesn’t like them. And his alter ego wants to start.

by LaoTzu on Oct 13, 2009 11:46 PM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Andre once superglued the feet of two cats together

to see if they would hover.

It wasn't the first time I'd been kicked in the cherries and called a rat by a woman, but it was the first time I didn't mind.

by shenanigans on Oct 14, 2009 12:33 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Most teenage runaways are suckers for the old Turkish Delight/grapes routine. Gets ’em every time.

by ArbyOSU on Oct 14, 2009 9:32 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

More Truth!

Andre Miller is John Canzano’s ghostwriter.

Andre Miller tried to draft The ’Stache.

Andre Miller is the reason we have no refs this season.

AND he is the one who told the new ones to “blow early and often” (the whistles, that is. You have a dirty mind…because of Andre Miller!)

Andre Miller moonlights as Al Davis.

by JonathanPDX on Oct 14, 2009 12:52 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Everyone recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize has always deserved it, no ifs ands or buts.

Just ask ’em. The Norweigens, I mean.

Disclosure: I am half Norweigen by blood.

"The match in Los Angeles is a good opportunity to begin to demonstrate that we want to make war." Rudy Fernández (translated)

by G_dubs on Oct 14, 2009 4:34 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I heard Andre Miller liked the movie Twilight.

"We have found out that you can just, you know, buy psychological validation, so..." -Nathan Explosion

Also, COMCAST SUCKS!!!

by randommanthefirst on Oct 14, 2009 4:48 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

ha ha ha...

The Faith don't panic, the faith freaks out, burns out farms, and torchs small villages in the name of The Faith.

"New Man Law: If you don't show up for the draft you don't get to come later if you're picked. If you believe in yourself, show up and sit there. If nobody else believes in you, take it and cry like a man...in front of the cameras."

-Dave

by faith on Oct 14, 2009 6:23 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I'm copying mine from the other post cuz I'm lazy

I heard that he has hit on all the players wives

And that he also hates all of their kids (in fact, he pushed Blake’s son out of the way and called Brandon Jr. a big baby!!!!).

He has also made fun of Rudy and Nic’s accents and told them to go back to Europe where they belong.

And I also heard that Miller called Brandon a punk :(((

What a meanie.

"We believe" -Rudy Fernandez

by twiggs on Oct 14, 2009 6:49 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I forgot that I also heard that

Andre Miller was the shooter on the grassy knoll.

"We believe" -Rudy Fernandez

by twiggs on Oct 14, 2009 6:55 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

andre miller plays fantasy basketball

and always drafts himself first over-all

by 50backflips on Oct 14, 2009 7:37 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Good one!

"The match in Los Angeles is a good opportunity to begin to demonstrate that we want to make war." Rudy Fernández (translated)

by G_dubs on Oct 14, 2009 8:20 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I like it. The Ankle-Collector, coming to a theater near you, Summer 2013.

by ArbyOSU on Oct 14, 2009 9:34 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

If we're all still alive then anyways

You know, the whole 12/12/12 thing

Blazers win!

by The X-man on Oct 14, 2009 11:54 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

It's 12/21/12

If you are referring to the Mayan calendar/Nostradomas thing.

Wouldn’t want anyone to do anything precipitous 9 days early!

quid Latine dictum sit, altum viditur

by dvcastle on Oct 14, 2009 2:34 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Ah, I thought you were referring to AM killing the whole human race

I heard he could be able to do it, and even willing to.

by Blogaddict on Oct 14, 2009 3:52 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You made me spit espresso out of my nose

that was horrible…

"No disrespect to Jeff Blake"

by Eat Politicians on Oct 14, 2009 5:46 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I heard that

this video was based on Miller’s life.

by Blogaddict on Oct 14, 2009 9:42 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller... truthiness.

Andre Miller is the grinch.

Andre Miller always takes the last brownie.
It’s a special brownie.
he makes fun of it riding the short bus.

When Andre miller sees signs that say 35mph ahead, He cruises through at 140mph with his posy.

Andre Miller makes brandon roy feel unselfish in comparison.

Andre Miller steals from the poor, gives to the rich, and pushes old ladies into cross walks when the light is red.

Andre was in the grassy knoll.

Andre Miller loves liver as often as he can.

Andre Miller’s preacher is the crazy Jesus lady from trading spouses.

Andre Miller thinks Blazer fans are whack jobs… oh wait… nm… that’s me.

"Fernandez, to my eyes, is the Blazer who walks that walk most comfortably. A lot of Portland's fans (egged on, dare I say, by their local broadcasters) lament things like how Ron Artest or Yao Ming get to hit Brandon Roy's arms.

But I suspect Fernandez sees all that and thinks: We get to hit arms! Cool!"

http://myespn.go.com/blogs/truehoop/0-39-135/On-Playoff-Experience.html

"I told Pau the Lakers never win here in Portland; I think it's great." -- Rudy Fernandez

by ratbastird on Oct 14, 2009 10:08 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

for those who don't know the jesus lady...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bOpva_iit-8

"Fernandez, to my eyes, is the Blazer who walks that walk most comfortably. A lot of Portland's fans (egged on, dare I say, by their local broadcasters) lament things like how Ron Artest or Yao Ming get to hit Brandon Roy's arms.

But I suspect Fernandez sees all that and thinks: We get to hit arms! Cool!"

http://myespn.go.com/blogs/truehoop/0-39-135/On-Playoff-Experience.html

"I told Pau the Lakers never win here in Portland; I think it's great." -- Rudy Fernandez

by ratbastird on Oct 14, 2009 10:20 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Andre just fired Rebecca Harlow...

and hired this guy as her replacement:
Photobucket

"I love me some mountain man." – ratbastird

by Devenex on Oct 14, 2009 10:27 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I heard........

that when he was in utah, he would draw chalk outlines of a homicide victim outside his front door an scatter mormon literature around it so he woulnt get bothered on the weekends.

by 2phattoplay on Oct 14, 2009 11:10 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

i just hand out something positive comics

There’s one in specific that’s probably not safe to link. It was great.

"Fernandez, to my eyes, is the Blazer who walks that walk most comfortably. A lot of Portland's fans (egged on, dare I say, by their local broadcasters) lament things like how Ron Artest or Yao Ming get to hit Brandon Roy's arms.

But I suspect Fernandez sees all that and thinks: We get to hit arms! Cool!"

http://myespn.go.com/blogs/truehoop/0-39-135/On-Playoff-Experience.html

"I told Pau the Lakers never win here in Portland; I think it's great." -- Rudy Fernandez

by ratbastird on Oct 14, 2009 12:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

so did I

when I lived there…maybe he’s not so bad.

"No disrespect to Jeff Blake"

by Eat Politicians on Oct 14, 2009 5:49 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

andre miller

is hiding osamin bin laden in his basement

bayless leaves over my dead body
andre miller>hedo, blake
real.baller
R.A.M.B.O (do it nate, if you are smart)
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it (last years starting line-up) go. Let it go."

by thomasikehara on Oct 14, 2009 11:12 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

no!

"If the Lakers are Hollywood, then we are South Central." - Clipper fan.

by Cablinasian on Oct 14, 2009 3:33 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Truly wise men are AFRAID to say ANYTHING bad about Andre Miller!!!

There is more to an athlete than how fast they can run, they also better be able to see what they are doing and know why they are doing it.

by KINGofMACct on Oct 14, 2009 2:47 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

andre miller

writes “first” on non-game-day threads

refers to the Blazers as ’Zers

thinks Brandon Roy is unselfish

callled Nate McMillian “the corporal”

writes trade ideas and puts them outside the trade drawer

thinks the hornets will give up chris paul for outlaw, blake, and a 2nd round pick

bayless leaves over my dead body
andre miller>hedo, blake
real.baller
R.A.M.B.O (do it nate, if you are smart)
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it (last years starting line-up) go. Let it go."

by thomasikehara on Oct 14, 2009 3:42 PM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Andre Miller is actually

AK1984

"BEER IS LIVING PROOF THAT GOD LOVES US"
- Benjamin Franklin-

by We-B-Dunkin on Oct 14, 2009 6:31 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Please STOP the HATE !!!!!!!!!111

Even if some or all of this stuff is true about Andre, we should respect his privacy!!! The guy gives 110% on the court, so what business is it of ours what he does at home??? Andre is a Blazer now and we should welcome him into the fold!!!

by CatMan2 on Oct 14, 2009 3:48 PM PDT reply actions   2 recs

Of course it's all true

Don’t you trust truthiness?
That keeps the whole blogsphera running.

by Blogaddict on Oct 14, 2009 3:58 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I heard he only gives 109%

can’t remember were I heard it though…some blog I was reading.

"No disrespect to Jeff Blake"

by Eat Politicians on Oct 14, 2009 5:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Dude,

This is a sarcastic post making fun of everyone who is overreacting about Miller.

"We believe" -Rudy Fernandez

by twiggs on Oct 15, 2009 6:53 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I hardly ever revisit older fanposts

But in this cases I’m glad I did.

If you really believe I was serious about either of comments above, you have “misunder-estimated” me badly. My brand of sarcasm is sarcastic about sarcasm. Or, to put it another way, I like to play the straight man in these discussions, and I hope my contribution makes everybody else’s efforts just a bit more successful.

Now I hope I didn’t miss seeing that you were being sarcastic about my sarcasm concerning the sarcasm here.

by CatMan2 on Oct 19, 2009 7:58 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Sarcasm FTW

No I didn’t know you were being sarcastic, so I misjudged your humor. I do apologize. You would think I woulda caught it, seeing as I am one of the most sarcastic people on Bedge. And we all know you can’t b.s. a b.s.-er :)

"We believe" -Rudy Fernandez

by twiggs on Oct 19, 2009 9:11 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller says “bruh.”

"If the Lakers are Hollywood, then we are South Central." - Clipper fan.

by Cablinasian on Oct 14, 2009 3:49 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller plays NBA Live, and pulls Bayless' hamstring

Andre Miller does always drink beer

Andre Miller asks Robert Downey Jr. to replace him on the court

When the Blazers win with 98 pts, Andre Miller eats 20,630 chalupas

Andre Miller turned down #7 to make Brandon Roy look selfish

by chuky on Oct 14, 2009 4:15 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller drinks straight out of the milk carton.

I do too.

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

by FiveOhThree-RipCity!! on Oct 14, 2009 4:24 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andrer Miller is....

I have come to the conclusion that due the fact that Andre is in fact so reclusive, he can only be…
BATMAN!!!

by dawgman47 on Oct 14, 2009 4:27 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller is the one who came up with the idea for this post. And he is sending a tape worm into every computer that is a source of a negative comment about him!

His is the last laugh.

There is more to an athlete than how fast they can run, they also better be able to see what they are doing and know why they are doing it.

by KINGofMACct on Oct 14, 2009 4:49 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller...

…Can sneeze with his eyes open…

by Ilikeemall on Oct 14, 2009 5:13 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

he can also speak French

in Russian

bayless leaves over my dead body
andre miller>hedo, blake
real.baller
R.A.M.B.O (do it nate, if you are smart)
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it (last years starting line-up) go. Let it go."

by thomasikehara on Oct 14, 2009 5:19 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

he is also going to boo channing frye tonight

bayless leaves over my dead body
andre miller>hedo, blake
real.baller
R.A.M.B.O (do it nate, if you are smart)
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it (last years starting line-up) go. Let it go."

by thomasikehara on Oct 14, 2009 5:37 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

gets plagiarized by John Canzano

"OK, it's going to rain tomorrow. And there is going to be a Greenpeace meeting and hippies are going to be protesting" ~ The Buffet of Goodness on Portland

by Blazer on Oct 14, 2009 6:05 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

What an a hole!

Andre doesn’t use his blinker.

Doesn’t use spray after dropping a duece.

Tips his waitresses 14%.

Twits.

by stonecoach on Oct 14, 2009 6:24 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre kicks kitties against the wall

it was caught on video

"And in the end
The love you take
Is equal to the love you make." -The Beatles

by 92wastheyear on Oct 15, 2009 8:37 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

not only has he done all these nasty, disturbing things, but he also isn’t very pretty

by aljo241 on Oct 14, 2009 7:05 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller?

Andre Miller is The Dingo that Ate your Baby.

Andre Miller is The Nosferatu of media relations.

Andre Miller is .01 case on “Deal or No Deal”.

Andre Miller is a Pauley Shore Film Festival.

Andre Miller is the 20 minute Oil and Lube center upselling you an entire transmission service.

Andre Miller is what Sarah Palin could see from her house.

Andre Miller is December 26th and you’ve lost all your receipts.

Andre Miller makes Brandon Roy a better player….if we are talking about UNO.

Andre Miller is Burgess Merediths’ glasses at the end of The Twilight Zone.

Andre Miller taught all the Oompa Loompa’s their dance moves.

Andre Miller is a typo on Ander Millers computer.

Andre Miller is a great slice of Pizza in a cosmpolitan city.

Welcome to Portland Andre.

"Mother Nature started this fight, I think it's about time we ended it!"

by Krang on Oct 15, 2009 10:09 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I heard Andre...

…is a scientologist. He actually trained L. Ron and recruited Tom Cruise personally!

The Vanilla Gorilla strikes again...

by JohnZ on Oct 15, 2009 11:14 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

andre miller planted a bomb at the center of the earth

that is set to go off on December 21, 2012

bayless leaves over my dead body
andre miller>hedo, blake
real.baller
R.A.M.B.O (do it nate, if you are smart)
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it (last years starting line-up) go. Let it go."

by thomasikehara on Oct 15, 2009 11:18 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

and everyone in the know

goes around saying “dat sniznitz was da BOMB!”

"Fernandez, to my eyes, is the Blazer who walks that walk most comfortably. A lot of Portland's fans (egged on, dare I say, by their local broadcasters) lament things like how Ron Artest or Yao Ming get to hit Brandon Roy's arms.

But I suspect Fernandez sees all that and thinks: We get to hit arms! Cool!"

http://myespn.go.com/blogs/truehoop/0-39-135/On-Playoff-Experience.html

"I told Pau the Lakers never win here in Portland; I think it's great." -- Rudy Fernandez

by ratbastird on Oct 16, 2009 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller says Trix are for adults

and he started the urban legend about pop rocks…….

by fairwayfreddy80 on Oct 15, 2009 11:44 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

sweet

i can finally get some.

"Fernandez, to my eyes, is the Blazer who walks that walk most comfortably. A lot of Portland's fans (egged on, dare I say, by their local broadcasters) lament things like how Ron Artest or Yao Ming get to hit Brandon Roy's arms.

But I suspect Fernandez sees all that and thinks: We get to hit arms! Cool!"

http://myespn.go.com/blogs/truehoop/0-39-135/On-Playoff-Experience.html

"I told Pau the Lakers never win here in Portland; I think it's great." -- Rudy Fernandez

by ratbastird on Oct 16, 2009 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Missed those T.S. jokes

thanks for the nostalgia

Give 'em the chump.
You mean play basketball?

by kpfor3 on Oct 16, 2009 5:45 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

andre miller

is a L@ker fan

bayless leaves over my dead body
andre miller>hedo, blake
real.baller
R.A.M.B.O (do it nate, if you are smart)
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it (last years starting line-up) go. Let it go."

by thomasikehara on Oct 15, 2009 2:03 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Andre Miller

spends to much time with Dan Dickau…

Last year I worked hard but I came down with a Staph infection, so I had to sit out for 3 weeks. This year I didn't catch no Staph infection so I was able to work out full. -Big bass Trav

by MikeRiceIsForLovers on Oct 15, 2009 2:31 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

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