Hell Freezes Over
by Dave on Jan 25, 2009 11:07 PM PST
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PrintToday we have a special treat on Blazersedge. We're going to have a new, occasional guest columnist and this is his first submission. His fine work is familiar to many of you, as you have seen him in such prestigious publications as...
Aw heck, it's Fatty, OK?
No, I didn't lose a bet. No, Fatty doesn't have pictures of me and Ben in Brandon Roy's locker with our braces stuck together. I actually did this on purpose.
Half of you are saying, "YESSSSS!"
Half of you are saying, "Dear God...why?!?"
For the latter half, let me explain. I have not always been the biggest fan of Fatty's work, nor his style, nor have I agreed with many of his conclusions. As a matter of fact, I can only get through about 1/3 of a Fatty post without getting a splitting headache from those margins and that grammar. However over the last few months I've seen people try to employ a blunt, in-your-face commenting style. It's come across pretty flat in most cases. Those who claim Fatty is kind of a troll may be correct, but if that's so he's a troll who has managed to be distinct and have a style. It's a funky style, but at least it's style. And pretty honest at that. If we're going to be blunt or abrasive, we at least need more style when doing it. So here's Fatty, leading the way. Some have said this blog has the best writers, the best coverage, the best community that you can find online. Now we'd like people to say we have the best (or at least most distinctive and interesting) trolls too.
The column will be occasional, I'm thinking. A dose of Fatty-ness every so often to wake us up. If you can't stand it, I guarantee these will be the easiest posts ever to quickly identify and skip.
So anyway, without further ado... You never thought you'd see it and believe me, neither did I... But here he is... On the main page of Blazersedge.com... Ladies and Gentlemen I give you... Fatty.
let me 1.st say hello to all my blazersedge
comrades all around the world 1.st thing i
would like to talk about is this team's identity
or style of play.my ? to all of you is do you really
know the style of play of this team on a consistant
basis.in my humble opinion i would like nate to
make this very young group into a defensive type
detroit*spurs style of play.1 of the problem's this
team has is you really don't know what blazers
team is going to show up on a nightly basis.
if nate decided this off*season to go a pure
defensive style and play to a 88-83 w's this team
would be scary.to back up my theory is the fact
that our team is very long and young,if you can
sell roy*aldridge*oden on playing a strictly defensive
style i promise you these kids will all buy into it.
2)-nate i know a lot of you guys are upset with his
style of play and coaching skills but a lot of as
usual dropped the ball on 1 most important fact
there is no pressure on nate to win a title for at
least 3 years.all of this foolish talk of a dynasty
in pdx is very unrealistic,sorry to burst a lot of
you people's bubble.in the nba it takes time to
become a serious title contender on a yearly
basis.bird*magic*duncan are the exceptions to
the rule.even m.j. took 7 years to win his 1.st
of 6 and should've been 8 straight title rings.
b.roy*l.aldridge are going to be a leathal combo
but the blazers are missing that 3.rd wheel,a guy
like a k.durant would be perfect for this group.
when the draft was going to happen two years
ago i said durant would fit perfect with those 2
guys,but i understood why oden was the choice.
as time goes on g.oden should come into his own
as a defesive dominant force,as for his offense
i said if ask nate privately oden=14-16.pts and
10.5-12.5 rebs a game and 3.5 blks he would
breakdance down pioneer.sq.this is a message
to all the fans who really believed g.oden was
going to put up shaq #ers=28-11.5-2 a night.
stop dreaming g.oden is going to be a lot closer
to those #ers i predict for him than those unrelistic
shaq #ers many of you believe he would put up.
do i believe g.oden is a bust no,matter of fact
when i was chatting with m.rice 2 weeks ago
i said coach imagine him in 2 years from this
day-1/15/11 how he'll be and this franchise will
be at.he looked at me and said "scary very scary"
i could'nt agree with him more.folks the fans
especially the one's who jumped aboard during
the oden regime this message is for you be
patient,it's going to take at least 3-4 years to get
the pieces in place for a very long title run.
with p.allen-l.miller-b.koldhe and especially
k.pricthard making the moves and a fiancial
bankroll in place,this team has a legitimate
title windo between 2011-2017 to win at least
2 titles maybe 3.and as far as the crowds at the
rose garden aka"god's palace"it sometimes
gives me goosebumps.i love pdx it's the best
little city america keeps sleeping on,like i told
m.williams*m.rice kep it that way portlander's.
the last thing you really need out there is rift*raft
invading that beautiful city on the pacific coast.
keep up the great work blazers fans because we
have'nt even scracthed the damn surface yet
on how great this franchise is going to be.
so to wrap up my 1.st article imho nate should
go to a strictly defensive type team because of
the youth and length of the kids on the roster.
2)-roy*aldridge need 1 more guy to make this
team complete.3)-g.oden is not going to be a
shaq type of player more a b.russell type of
player.4)-this franchise is in great shape fiancially
and player management department.5)-the fans
have been sensational in pdx*the state of oregon
but most importantly at the rose garden keep up
the great work blazermaniacs.6)-and how can
i forget the most loyal blazersfans on the planet
the readers and contributors on blazersedge
without you i would'nt know any of you great
people and a special thank-you to dave for
asking me to write this article.and to you ben
for giving me a fair shot to talk to you about
the team while on was on my 1 year ban.
thank-you blazersedge and keep up the great
blogging and most importantly "go blazers".
Oy. My head hurts already.
--Dave (blazersub@yahoo.com)
400 comments
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10 recs |
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Comments
First
On this post of true epicness (I hope)
2)-roy*aldridge need 1 more guy to make this
team complete.3)-g.oden is not going to be a
shaq type of player more a b.russell type of
player
I really hope Oden isn’t a Shaq, that he’s a Bill Russell. Russell’s Celtics won a billion titles, and I personally consider him the greatest center of all time. If Oden = Russell, there will be victory parades in Portland for many years.
I saw that too
Why exactly would a Five time MVP, 12 time All Star, Hall of Fame center with ELEVEN rings not make this team complete?
Then again, maybe Fatty was talking about Bryan Russell.
by Bedhead on Jan 26, 2009 11:25 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Dear Lord in Heaven.
What hath you wrought?
Rudyculize: The act of Rudy making others look slow, dim and generally oafish.
http://www.myspace.com/y5k
by the way, fatty ...
Sorry about ditching out on Rosa Mexicana a few months ago. I had house guests show up all of a sudden and I could not get away.
Look me up if you are in Hong Kong.
Rudyculize: The act of Rudy making others look slow, dim and generally oafish.
http://www.myspace.com/y5k
I got about a quarter of the way through
This is what Lucas would do. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0aPkIE2qK0
by 123_G.O._RipCity on Jan 25, 2009 11:27 PM PST up reply actions
i got about 1/2 way ...
Rudyculize: The act of Rudy making others look slow, dim and generally oafish.
http://www.myspace.com/y5k
I ignored it completely because it's a waste of everyone's time.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:35 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
just sayin'
for someone who ignored it completely, you’ve got an awful lot of response posts.
by abdelnaby on Jan 25, 2009 11:40 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
That's a critic for you.
Rudyculize: The act of Rudy making others look slow, dim and generally oafish.
http://www.myspace.com/y5k
Well, his post IS a waste of everyone's time
UNTIL Dave starts sayiing he’s going to FEATURE him.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:03 AM PST up reply actions
I skip over the podcast posts
and I’ve found myself going to fewer gameday threads
and I hardly ever go to junk drawers
None of those things waste my time, but they will all occur more often than fatty’s feature posts. They don’t waste my time because I know what I come here for and what I’d rather skip.
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
Hmmm
Good point.
I suppose for me it’s more the principal of trying to keep Bedge free of this sort of nonsense not about actual content.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:09 AM PST up reply actions
wow
super unrek
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:00 AM PST up reply actions
you didn't read it, but you know it's not about content ...
impressive divination
Commas, Paragraphs, and Less Numerals Please
I have to admit that I stopped reading after the first quarter of Fatty’s column. I like your content and insight, but it’d be so much easier to read if you had organized your post with some paragraphs.
I read the whole thing...
but like Dave, I ended with a headache. I found Fatty’s points to be valid and reasonably laid out. Maybe an editor/proofreader to make it more readable, at least on main page posts would be in order.
Can people actually read that?
I lasted only a few lines. Punctuation & paragraph breaks were invented to make reading easier. Nothing against Fatty. But Dave: if you wish to “publish” someone, the least you can do is serve as their editor. I’m just saying…
"We don't back down to nobody." --Joel Przybilla
You couldn't "edit" this
With a 15 gallon drim of “white-out”
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:39 PM PST up reply actions
You'd need one drop of that white-out to convert "drim" into "drum"
"We don't back down to nobody." --Joel Przybilla
Way to go after typos
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:34 AM PST up reply actions
He's drunk or high and hopefully embarrassed in the morning.
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
What am I doing????
I don’t understand… I’m just expressing my opinion… right?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:35 AM PST up reply actions
I mean, really... I've posted 30 things in 30 minutes and you're nit-picking drim and drum???!?!?!
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:34 AM PST up reply actions
Case in point.
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
what did Joyce do?
hit the editor over the head with a bottle of absinthe?
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 2:40 AM PST up reply actions
does the bottle that contains absinthe have the same properties as the drink inside?
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
I hope so
and I’m going to start beating myself as soon as I get home.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 12:57 PM PST up reply actions
I wouldn't read a book by fatty
anymore than I would read a Joyce novel. Maybe it’s just mean by Joyce gives me a vibe of “Look at me, look how complicated and difficult my prose is to read. Aren’t I smart being able to pack every sentence with allusions, puns and other highbrow word-smithery? You peons can’t possibly grasp the full meaning of my novel.” Or maybe that’s just Joyce enthusiasts. Either way, there comes a point when those techniques (stream of consciousness, allusions, dense, in a good way, writing) detract from the story more than they add to it. Joyce is ridiculously far past that point.
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
James Joyce in my opinion
is more about the way he writes, rather than the story that he writes about. The mechanics of writing and the things that he does were ground-breaking, and in some senses remain unmatched to this day. That being said, he’s not an easy read, and is probably to be avoided unless you’re really into that kind of thing. In school I used to say that I was really glad that Joyce wrote what he did, but I wasn’t that glad that I had to read it.
Joyce's stories ("Dubliners") are actually quite normal and good....
………………………………. It’s just that filthy, filthy Ulysses book that’s unreadable at any speed.
"Now with a non-provocative footer!"
yes, it was kinda easy
for people that “CAN’T” read this, its one of two problems. either your an arregant ellitest, or your suffering from a saveer lack of criticle thinking skills, which would really leave you unfit for procreation. i suspect that hear on this board, the inability to read fatty is better explained by a candie coated lifestyle expirence.
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:06 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Count me in
You have properly diagnosed me. I am both an “arregant ellitest” and am suffering from a “seveer” lack of “criticle” thinking skills. You are correct in assuming that my “candie” coated lifestyle “expirence” has lead to my reactions “hear”.
Those red lines under the words mean something.
yes, if your using firefox
you dont really think that EVERYONE uses firefox, do you?
yeah, theres a couple of them, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_web_browsers
hears a relativly safe place to dounload them, http://www.download.com/windows/browsers/1921-2137_4-0.html
check it out, mozilla AND firefox??? WFT!?!?! youll have to do your own research on this one, but its kind of interesting, http://browsehappy.com/browsers/
youve helped to prove my point, at least in my eyes you have. im sure you’ll have your sympathysers, so you can take confort in that.
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:45 AM PST up reply actions
i forgot googles new chrome, but im sure you get the point
and to be clear, i think that if instructions were contained in fattys musings that provided water to those without, or a cure to those sure to die otherwise, that youde be able to understand just fine. I would suspect that your main problem is that you feal offended somehow at his lack of care to that which you hold so dear, ie, priviladged lifestyle
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:49 AM PST up reply actions
ahhh... what the heck...
this was posted as a reply to the gatorade… “Like Fat…” commercial.
I heart taxes.
Ha Ha
Yo, ding dong, yo, ding dong.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck was on ice?
by tominhawaii on Jan 26, 2009 12:01 PM PST up reply actions
Its on youtube, and just as funny as ever.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jw00EUh0GT4
I heart taxes.
nao i get it
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:10 PM PST up reply actions
nao i get it
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:11 PM PST up reply actions
i had only heard rumblings
and murmurs about this fatty character, but i’ve only been registered since.. this summer i think?
so what was the story then, a 1 year ban? for what?
as to this particular column, i got bored and eye strain. sorry fatty, we can still be friends though right?
i'm ready to graduate now.
kthx.
just going by what I've heard
Fatty predicted Oden’s knee injury wouldn’t be serious and he would ban himself for a year if it was serious. I’m pretty sure fatty was true to his word and didn’t post for a year after Greg’s surgery.
I wasn’t around for vintage fatty, but I have seen some of his posts since he’s been back. Apparently, there was a minor cult following and also a lot of people who he irritated. A polarizing figure if you will.
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
there was also the G--F debacle
After we drafted Oden, there was an influx of new posters who fatty and others felt were drowning out the old die-hards. fatty took the fight to them and coined a nickname that has since been banned by Dave. That was probably fatty at his most antagonistic.
Fatty didn't coin it
I did (in fun) — Greg Oden Only Fans (GOOFs). But fatty adopted it, and it kind of ceased to be fun before long, so Dave banned it.
When I rule the world, everyone will know how to use Excel.
ah, that's right
it feels like such a long time ago. The halcyon days of the Edge, when GOOFs rambled through the verdant plains.
I found BE in the summer of 2006 . . .
from a link on O-live. The Blazers were ready to
take a big step by adding BRoy & Smooth, especially
coming off the worst record in the league. When I dreamed
about how to round the team into championship form,
I argued for adding a franchise center to our budding young
trio (Roy, LMA & Marty). Having seen GO in HS & college,my
dream pick was made. Of course, when the Blazers upset the
world at the 2007 lottery, I was pumped. Multiple GO posts later,
BD labeled me a G _ _ F ! The only problem with the label was
30 + years as a Blazermaniac made me a BOF ! (Blazers only Fan)
I loved GO for what he could do for this team, but acknowledged
he was RAW & unpolished. Soon our spelling & punctuation challenged
NYC dweller was accusing everyone of jumping on the Blazer bandwagon
just because we scored the # 1 pick. The arrogance of a kid posting from
his mom’s basement about the status of long time Blazer fans was too
much to handle. I don’t know a single poster or commentor on this site
personally, but give fans the benefit of telling their story. Listening to
Schonz on the radio in 1975-76 was enough to hook me for life, regardless
of a few bad apples smoking, spitting or thugging. Blazermania for life !
P.S. – Don’t do it Dave. You will regret this decision !
It's GO time !
I don't give a monkeys fart about fatty
Even if you have something important to say, SAY IT RIGHT!!!
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:29 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
"monkeys" needed an apostrophe
You clearly intended to reference a single monkey fart, not multiple monkey farts or farts by multiple monkeys, so your comment should read as follows:
“I don’t give a monkey’s fart about fatty (Dave, for the love of God why did you do this to us?)”
by LaoTzu on Jan 26, 2009 1:34 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Wow...
I know I was talking about more grammar… but damn…
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:42 AM PST up reply actions
You are right, but you are being obnoxious about it.
Just let it go. The OP had a good disclaimer, and there have been plenty of comments about the grammar. Ten minutes, and I haven’t read a comment about the content yet.
I heart taxes.
goose...gander...wutnot
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:33 AM PST up reply actions
monkeys need bananas and water
they don’t need apostrophes
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 2:01 AM PST up reply actions
rek
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:33 AM PST up reply actions
well I was checking out the archives to see the post from when greg went down ...
and it seemed like he pissed off lots of people
Not "a lot" EVERYONE.
Controversey is great, but I don’t disagree with fatty’s opinions, just his presentation.
Please don’t endorse this sort of Netspeak Dave… Please??/
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:31 PM PST up reply actions
just stop
if you don’t read it, don’t read it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
I didn't
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:56 PM PST up reply actions
My only point
Is that there’s a right way to write and there’s a left way to right…
wait….
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:56 PM PST up reply actions
This really is an early April fool...
Right?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
I like this addition, Dave.
Even though it’ll take me three weeks to figure out what Fatty said.
by parkinglotj on Jan 25, 2009 11:32 PM PST reply actions 2 recs
agreed.
nice variation.
good commentary.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
Wait.... WTF?
My blog “SUX” but I have “GOOD COMMENTARY”?
Okeee Dokeee
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:59 PM PST up reply actions
hahahaha
thanks, for explaining to him how to read the internet.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
like a rare bird.
Makes an odd noise, but nice to see one every so often.
Rudyculize: The act of Rudy making others look slow, dim and generally oafish.
http://www.myspace.com/y5k
by Y5k on Jan 26, 2009 12:00 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
yep.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
Flag what?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:34 PM PST up reply actions
Ah, good call
I flagged it too. I thought you were taling about me. And, while I’m mad enough at this concept to get flagged, I’m man enough to leave if this is the way it rolls. This sort of post is Anti-Edge.
YOU HEAR THAT DAVE???? ANTI-EDGE!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:37 PM PST up reply actions
Im taking my ball and going HOME!!!
humpfht.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAhahahahaahahahaha….
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:53 AM PST up reply actions
LOL
You guys are funny.
And obviously don’t understand true art when you see it. Fatty’s posts are like tightly wrapped Christmas presents. You know, those annoying ones that are a box, inside another box, inside another box.
They can be a pain to open, but if you take the time to get to the bottom (aka interpret his Fatty-language), it’s actually well-worth the time.
I’m not quite sure why it’s main page, and not fanpost, but heck, I love it either way. +1 for Dave and Fatty.
"What's that, some kind of hamburger?"
--Bo Outlaw on being asked how he felt about recording his first triple double.
by prezofdeath on Jan 25, 2009 11:40 PM PST up reply actions
and by +1 I mean I actually rec'd the post
not just one of those pseudo +1s I see floating around here sometimes… ;-)
"What's that, some kind of hamburger?"
--Bo Outlaw on being asked how he felt about recording his first triple double.
by prezofdeath on Jan 25, 2009 11:42 PM PST up reply actions
I think you mean matryoshka dolls
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matryoshka_doll
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
heh, I wrapped a present like that just the other day
for a white elephant gift exchange. There was a dollar limit for the gift itself, so I put a little extra money into boxing and wrapping paper.
Not even close on the analogy.
More like a Snickers bar that’s been dropped on the ground & kicked around a few times, is gritty with sand & bits of twig, has what looks suspisously like dog crap on it and has been stepped on at least once.
In other words, you know there is probably something worthwhile there, but you really don’t want to bother with the hassle of cleaning it up.
hakkaa päälle !
ouch
althow i disagree, that was at least the most creative and entertaining anti-fatty poast ive read yet
GO FATTY!!!!1111
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 11:56 AM PST up reply actions
I'm not anti - fatty
I just can’t take posts of his that are more than 6 – 8 lines long.
Truth is I tend to agree with his opinions about 70% or so of the time. Plus he’s a big Buck Williams fan, which means he could be a serial child rapist and I’d still invite him over to watch a game.
hakkaa päälle !
by timg56 on Jan 26, 2009 12:11 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
I technically got through the whole thing
Some counter points:
I don’t think we need a 3rd wheel of Durant’s caliber after Roy and Aldridge. Our combination of sharpshooting 3s and Greg Oden is plenty. I know fatty has a slightly lower opinion of Greg than most of us, but 15-16 pts a game is still plenty for a 3rd option, especially when we’ve got such a powerful bench.
I don’t know if we could change this team into a Spurs caliber defensive team. We’ve got some of the tools, but I don’t know if we can put it all together. I would love to see this team become a top 10 defense, but I just don’t know. I don’t know if this is something that can be predicted. Right now I have to assume the defense will be in the bottom half until there is evidence to argue otherwise. Not that I don’t think it’s possible. Batum and Oden are great pillars with which to begin. Bayless has the tools to lock down the PG spot. Aldridge has the length to defend the 4 spot. Roy is well….Roy, I think if he wants to he could become a solid defender. I think we can, I hope we can, but there’s a lot of work to be done.
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
by Magnum on Jan 25, 2009 11:38 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
just like old times
I barely made it through, and my eyes started glazing over about six lines in, so I’m in no position to make any kind of response. A classic fatty work! It’s good to hear from him again. Now I’m going to take some aspirin.
Talk to Dr. Kevorkian if you read the entire thing...
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:40 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Don't know what defines "vet" exactly, but I will chime in and say
that I think Fatty is a welcome addition to the group of Bedgers that frequent the site. NO ONE can match his unique style, so whether you agree with him or think he’s a complete doofus, it’s fun just to read his posts (or try to…eventually your eyes start bleeding and you have to stop)…..if not for the analysis, then simply for the chuckle you’ll get wading through his post (usually severely lacking in capital letters or proper punctuation).
As far as this post goes, I think it’s a fair response to the “Would You Rather Have KD over GO” debate that’s been going on in the sidebar. He acknowledges both sides of the argument, and states his case (even if it is hard to decipher…lol).
Nothing wrong with that, even though I don’t agree completely. I personally think Greg Oden is a freakin’ beast…..and he’s going to be for a long time. Oden > KD without question for me.
Still, that doesn’t stop me from appreciating Fatty’s opinion. If the world was made entirely of me-clones, dang! What a sucky world that would be!
"What's that, some kind of hamburger?"
--Bo Outlaw on being asked how he felt about recording his first triple double.
by prezofdeath on Jan 25, 2009 11:57 PM PST up reply actions
Just not a good article...
Not only extremely hard to read but not very well thought out.
A Kevin Durant on this team instantly makes Roy and Aldridge worse statistically. Also, saying that we need a defensive minded team and then suggesting we get a Kevin Durant style player is an oxymoron. Bruce Bowen I would understand, but another SG? No dice.
Interesting, I didn't think about it that way
but it could be 2 separate ideas, it’s hard to tell if that’s what he meant.
1. Get a 3rd major offensive threat
or
2. Make this team play top 10 D
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
Honestly...
I’m not trying to critique the “style” of the post, but if there were some commas or periods or something showing the delineation of the points, then I could tell if he were making some kind of either/or argument. As it was all the ideas just ran together.
I wasn't clear....
I meant your point about the oxymoron was interesting. If you got that, sorry for repeating myself.
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
but wouldnt a third offencive threat,
by definition open up the flore more for Roy and Aldridge??? i just dont see either of them getting as many double teams with durrant on the floor
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:00 PM PST up reply actions
OK
I’ve talked a lot of $#!% on this thread, and I just have to say this:
fatty has said nothing here that has not ALREADY been said 50 times (at least) he just said it with no punctuation. Repeating cliches we all spout but with no thought to a coherent sentence.
What I am asking you is: Should that be rewarded? Is that “different” enough “new” enough? Really? Is it, in this case, the singer not the song?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:52 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
Get over yourself.
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
by annthefan on Jan 25, 2009 11:59 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
May I ask you a serious question
You mentioned your own blog. My first thought as to why you’re offended by fatty on the main page is that he’s getting attention for his opinion but you are not. Could this be the case?
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
I guess
I do want some attention, but I’ve always had a thing against “netspeak” yeah, a futile endeavour, but I toil on in the hopes that one day I will prevail againd the ungrammatical ones…
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:05 AM PST up reply actions
You might be able to teach proper english
for use in formal writing to plenty of people, but it is impossible to stop how language changes through time. Netspeak is here to stay, the best you can hope for is the same people who use netspeak have the ability to communicate their thoughts clearly when the situation is more formal. Other than that, just skip over the people who don’t take the time or don’t care enough to form easily readable sentences.
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
I don't disagree with you
But do you consider what “Fatty” just wrote to be “readable”? I mean, people are saying they are confused and asking for summaries… I’m not against language changing (in fact that is the sign of a vibrant culture) but I merely ask that the rules are recognized, if not nesciscarily followed.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:14 AM PST up reply actions
Do you have spellcheck capabilities?
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
How?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:04 AM PST up reply actions
Not using paragraphs isn’t style—it’s just hard too read and follow. Further, he calls Oden a bust (I think?) and then says he agrees with Mike Rice about Oden and the team being extremely scary. I can’t even tell what point he’s trying to make.
Imagine what impression this gives to first time readers when they see this at the top of the page.
by wepto on Jan 25, 2009 11:53 PM PST reply actions 2 recs
Exactly
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 25, 2009 11:54 PM PST up reply actions
GO
Fatty did not call Greg a bust. He asked the question of whether he thought GO was a bust and responded ‘no’. Fatty said Greg would not put up Shaq-type numbers (as many expected) and alluded he would be very impressive.
Fatty did say he would have chosen Durant. And Fatty has been consistent about that since the draft Durant/Oden buildup 2 years ago. I disagreed with him at the time, but Fatty has shown the conviction to stand by his opinion.
this might in fact be a rair example of criticle thinking defishencies, lol
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:04 PM PST up reply actions
I'm too new here to know about Fattys legacy.
but that “column” was too sloppy to even get half way through. im dizzy.
"I saw him in the face"
by RoodiePhirnandizz on Jan 25, 2009 11:59 PM PST reply actions
okay one question ...
why is a guy who calls himself “Fatty” worth talking about at midnight on a sunday?
by BR7formvp on Jan 26, 2009 12:01 AM PST reply actions 5 recs
lol rec
"What's that, some kind of hamburger?"
--Bo Outlaw on being asked how he felt about recording his first triple double.
by prezofdeath on Jan 26, 2009 12:01 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
by rec
do you mean a fake rec that doesn’t actually +1?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
by Portland89 on Jan 26, 2009 12:05 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
oh
nvm, it didn’t show until i +1-ed also.
damn thread not updating.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
hahahhahah
rec
"What's that, some kind of hamburger?"
--Bo Outlaw on being asked how he felt about recording his first triple double.
by prezofdeath on Jan 26, 2009 12:28 AM PST up reply actions
THIS REALLY SUCKS
These young guys are too up and down to play lock down on anybody. I trust this crew in the clutch, but let’s get out on teams we can. We will not be a lock down defensive team for another year or to, and yes Nate is instilling that.
Yeah, right, let’s get Durant. Is he strong enough to play the three on a contender?
Yes, Oden will be a player. Can he be a 20+/10+ guy. Let’s see, every time he can stay in the game he gives us 13/10, now. So, yes, he might be that dominant. Not every night, maybe, but maybe so.
Your financial analysis seemed missing.
And use spell check and grammar check.
This is an incredibly lazy “attempt” overall. It is like Fatty is laying down some weak hype for a lame hip hop jam up in someone’s back yard. The Blazers are not weak and we don’t need none of that.
Special dis for Dave: -100.
You can stop this already.
"celtsfan700: Celtics are the most clutch team in basketball. BAR NONE. Nobody takes over fourth quarters like this team. They find ways to win every night, whether things are going good or bad ... it's the mark of a champion, folks."
by LaoTzu on Jan 26, 2009 12:05 AM PST reply actions 2 recs
Someone summarize the main points please
I tried to read it but failed after 10 lines.
BINGO, BANGO, BONGO
Ok
First: This post is incredibly difficult to read and an affront to human sensiblility.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:07 AM PST up reply actions
See my post just above.
Or burn your computer. That is what I felt like doing.
"celtsfan700: Celtics are the most clutch team in basketball. BAR NONE. Nobody takes over fourth quarters like this team. They find ways to win every night, whether things are going good or bad ... it's the mark of a champion, folks."
The fact
That someone needs a summary should be all the reason Dave needs to shut this down before it ecalates.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:11 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Dude, seriously, discuss the basketball points.
There is no reason to throw a temper tantrum on Blazers Edge for all to see. Make your point once.
Travis Outlaw is an alien, but in a good way.
Awesome Graphic was provided by CIC, because he felt like he should be hazed.
by Clevelander among roses on Jan 26, 2009 12:12 AM PST up reply actions 4 recs
rec
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck was on ice?
by tominhawaii on Jan 26, 2009 11:02 AM PST up reply actions
Summary of the points:
1) The Blazers should focus on becoming a top defensive team. We have the length to do it, now we need to instill the drive.
2) The Blazers need another player to step up and be the third leg of the tripod behind Roy and Aldridge. The reason for this need is unclear, but I think it’s an implicit criticism of Oden, or at least an acknowledgement that he isn’t going to be as good offensively as people think.
3) Portland is awesome, but we’re not going to be a dynasty. He sees us as competing for as many as 3 titles in a 7 year window, but that doesn’t meet his definition of dynasty.
4) Love for Blazer fans.
Travis Outlaw is an alien, but in a good way.
Awesome Graphic was provided by CIC, because he felt like he should be hazed.
by Clevelander among roses on Jan 26, 2009 12:16 AM PST up reply actions 4 recs
A summary
1. We could be a good defensive team. Nate could teach this team to do that and the young guys would listen.
2. Nate is a good coach, don’t be so down on him. He’s got plenty of time to lead this squad to a trophy.
3. Right now we need a 3rd offensive threat to go with Aldridge and Roy. Durant or someone similar would work. He preferred to draft Durant 2 years ago, but he knows why we went with Oden.
4. This team is not going to be a dynastic team on the same time line that most of us think. We could win several championships, but it’s going to be a while before that happens. However, it’s going to be sweet to root for this team and win that championship.
5. Oden will be good, but he won’t be Shaq level dominant. Fatty doesn’t think Oden will be a bust.
6. We have great fans, great management, and the people of BE are some of the best fans. Fatty thanks everyone of us for making the site great.
7. Fatty thanks Dave and Ben for being great bloggers and giving him a post on the main area.
I think i got everything
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
by Magnum on Jan 26, 2009 12:19 AM PST up reply actions 5 recs
Translation forth coming
hi.to.BEbloggers.da blazers suc w/o D cuz I was chattin up to m.rice an with some D dis is scary. be very scared. the blazers need to wheel and deal but mainly just wheel.
potential is. off the charts. teamwise an fanwise love peace to all.and thanks
Hope that clears it up.
Come on, give the guy a break.
Do I like that style – No. Did I read the whole thing – Yes, it wasn’t hard.
Let me forecast the future: in less than a week some blogger is going to post essentially the same points. We’re all going to Rec it to the moon ‘cause we like him, and are truly amazed at his veritable plethora of basketball knowledge.
If indeed Fatty banned himself to stay true to his own word, he has what 99.99% of what the world doesn’t have. I wish I met more people in this world who were true to themselves, and true to their word.
GO
THE TEACHER ......come into my classroom "THE PAINT" for some tutelage.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"The rancor reflected in that remark I won't dignify with comment. But I'll address your general attitude of hopeless negativism." – Everett "O Brother, where art Thou?"
by Blazer1342 on Jan 26, 2009 3:46 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Rec
If indeed Fatty banned himself to stay true to his own word, he has what 99.99% of what the world doesn’t have. I wish I met more people in this world who were true to themselves, and true to their word.
Rec’d for this comment.
I don’t agree with some of fatty’s comments, I don’t always like the way he expresses himself, but fatty obviously knows basketball (even if he is a little opinionated). Mostly, though, I respect him as a person.
When fatty self-banned, some people tried to talk him out of it. I knew he wasn’t going to go back on it — he’d given his word. That’s worth something.
When I rule the world, everyone will know how to use Excel.
xcelent
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:18 PM PST up reply actions
jscot, maid tu rec
Thanks for the feedback. After I posted I thought some might think I was mocking Fatty’s style, this was not the case. I was hoping to draw a laugh from those who didn’t like his style and then follow with a little face slap.
i.e. you’ll read this style for a laugh, but you won’t read it for a basketball point.
shame on me, cuz ther wuz a little bit of a mock intended for those who complaind of his style
GO
THE TEACHER ......come into my classroom "THE PAINT" for some tutelage.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"The rancor reflected in that remark I won't dignify with comment. But I'll address your general attitude of hopeless negativism." – Everett "O Brother, where art Thou?"
sumarize poetry - there is no point to that
It’s like reading screenplays – possible, not what’s is meant for.
halidablazer is right
It is escalating!
"celtsfan700: Celtics are the most clutch team in basketball. BAR NONE. Nobody takes over fourth quarters like this team. They find ways to win every night, whether things are going good or bad ... it's the mark of a champion, folks."
there are no valid basketball points in that article to discuss ...
by BR7formvp on Jan 26, 2009 12:14 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
I'm 24!!! I swear to God, I'm 24!!1
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:15 AM PST up reply actions
Don't go to prison.
"celtsfan700: Celtics are the most clutch team in basketball. BAR NONE. Nobody takes over fourth quarters like this team. They find ways to win every night, whether things are going good or bad ... it's the mark of a champion, folks."
serious?
he talks about Defensive vs. Offensive efficiency,
Nate’s coaching style begin affected by Dynasty talk,
Bringing in another prolific scorer.
all pretty good stuff if you ask me.
at lead valid to discuss, not flip out about his writing style.
jeeze.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
he says that we need to play more D ...
but Durant = More Offense.
by BR7formvp on Jan 26, 2009 12:16 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
his opinion is that with this current roster
we need to focus soley, or more vehenamently on D as the guys are all young and athletic enough to make the investment pay out. He is NOT advocating trading durrant for oden and then focusing on D. he is also not saying that if we had drafted durrant that he would still be looking at what he feals the coach needs to focus on the same way, although he might. Its also presumptuous to declare that durrant would develop xzaktly the same as he did for the sonik-thunder under an entirely different set of circumstances, that he would have faced hear in portland. some people belive in nuture over nature or vice versa, but neither is mutually exclusive. its allways gonna be somewhare in between.
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:24 PM PST up reply actions
we just need Batum to get a little more NBA experience and he could
become our lock down defender at the 3
Well,
Then that’s an argument for standing pat at the trade deadline. I agree witht htat line of thinking, and thwen see how it pans out in FA this summer
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:18 AM PST up reply actions
exactly what i said earlier.
his offense is growing too, but his D will be way superior to Durant’s next year.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj8DgWnbVng&feature=bz303
MVP *** MVP *** MVP
I've never scored more than 38 ..... not even in Little League.
I must say, Dave
If you were going for entertainment value, you succeeded. Halidablazer is in full meltdown.
And I only post on here once every couple of months.
Dave just hit one of my sore spots.
Like you couldn’t tell.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:27 AM PST up reply actions
were all going to die!!!
<img src=“”http://s480.photobucket.com/albums/rr162/Expletive-Deleted/?action=view¤t=487e3087-0001e-03114-400cb8e1.jpg" target="_blank">
"/>
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:42 PM PST up reply actions
Dave, I would really prefer an article by that 13-year-old girl mentioned above
Or just about anything.
"celtsfan700: Celtics are the most clutch team in basketball. BAR NONE. Nobody takes over fourth quarters like this team. They find ways to win every night, whether things are going good or bad ... it's the mark of a champion, folks."
by LaoTzu on Jan 26, 2009 12:30 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
SEE?!?
The people love me and my hissy 13 year old girl panties!
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:31 AM PST up reply actions
Yes, I AM laughing at myself.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:31 AM PST up reply actions
sigh...
Including me…
Aparently I’m either drunk or high… or both…
Ah well…
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:37 AM PST up reply actions
I'm working on the first one, but wish I was the other.
Hell, this thread would be much more awesome that way.
The other is always more difficult.
Unless you’re a “glue guy”
Yeah?
Yeah?
Anyone?
Anyone?
…
Well, fine then
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:44 AM PST up reply actions
Ben and/or Dave is going to have a hell of a time tommorow morning taking care
of the Trolls and Flamers
this is stupid
there is absolutely no reason that this guy’s opinions should be on the front page of this blog. end of story. it makes your blog look significantly less professional, and it’s a disappointment to me as a fan of this blog.
by ultimatefish on Jan 26, 2009 12:40 AM PST reply actions 3 recs
hmmm
Really, that was all I was trying to say…. I suppose I should have stopped at my first post, but here I am…
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:41 AM PST up reply actions
Less professional?
Ah man, that’s why I come to Blazer’s Edge, for the professionalism. Then when I’m interested in the opinion of biased “media-types” I head over to ESPN.
I think it’s great to see Fatty on the front page, and I think the point is that Fatty argues against opposing points, not the people who hold those points. Even with the G—F fiasco, I thought his intent was to focus people on the whole team instead of thinking of Greg as the savior. If we didn’t have all sorts of fan perspective on this site, it would be a lot less enjoyable for me to read.
Not exactly
I know that the situations happened around the same time, I was just referring to the discussion abdelnaby and jscot mentioned a few posts above.
is his fiance still alive?
or did she go TU (god forbid)?
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 12:58 PM PST up reply actions
fan perspective is great...
…and we have it here in the form of comment boards and fanposts.
the distinction with the fatty post is that we are giving a single fan the prominence to use the front page as a forum for his ideas. deciding on who this is seems relatively arbitrary, but that’s not my biggest issue here. the problem is that we’ve given this kind of prominence to a fan with no ability to form coherent thoughts. i find this latter characteristic problematic and, frankly, obnoxious.
here’s an idea… if we’re going to have fatty’s thoughts on the front page of this website, can we at least have someone edit his post so that it’s legible? or is his style too inaccessible for that to happen?
fish
by ultimatefish on Jan 26, 2009 3:22 PM PST up reply actions
Did anyone see the photo that went with the post…
To me, there was a story in that photo that embodies one of the reasons why I like this place!!
A fan got to live a little dream. If that was me in the photo, am I going to keep that picture? Oh yeah.
GO
THE TEACHER ......come into my classroom "THE PAINT" for some tutelage.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"The rancor reflected in that remark I won't dignify with comment. But I'll address your general attitude of hopeless negativism." – Everett "O Brother, where art Thou?"
by Blazer1342 on Jan 26, 2009 4:11 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
It's a blog
There are no standards for blogs.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck was on ice?
by tominhawaii on Jan 26, 2009 11:04 AM PST up reply actions
lol
this is Daves blog, and he runs his world as HE sees fit, unless his wife tells him otherwise
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:46 PM PST up reply actions
This is fun.
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
Like a barrel of drunken monkeys with power tools.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:42 AM PST up reply actions
you win the internets
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:48 PM PST up reply actions
While Fatty's Rant appears to be an article somehow related to the Blazers
Consider how, sound for sound, what this scribbling would mean in ancient Sumerian. It is in fact a death rite for K*be’s big toes. If this analysis is right, I may be able to support the effort, and the clamor hear to bring it to fruition. But I am seeking corroboration.
Either that or complex laundry instructions in Cantonese.
Without inflection marks, we may never know.
Ummm....
HUH?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:43 AM PST up reply actions
Am I coming off more crazy than I think?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:44 AM PST up reply actions
What ever you do
don’t recite fatty’s post on the winter solstice in 2012. END. OF. THE. WORLD.
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
by Magnum on Jan 26, 2009 12:45 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
oooohhhh
that made me laf soooo loud
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:49 PM PST up reply actions
Trolling? Moi?
Because it’s funny.
Because I did not start it, Dave did.
Because it is not meant to be hurtful. Trolling? No, every comment I made is an attempt to educate and improve.
Because, darn it, I’m good. And people like me.
(Plus it is generally well-articulated.)
Who?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:50 AM PST up reply actions
Fatty = The Michael Jordan of the blogosphere
Every young Bedgers wants to be like The Fat One…
“Sometimes I dream, that he is me… I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be FAT, I want to be FAT”
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 12:46 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
I thought you loved me BaBs!!!
WHHHAAAAAHHH!!! BOOO HOOOOO!!!!!
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:48 AM PST up reply actions
I do love you, you're the Magic Johnson of BlazersEdge
[keep taking those drugs… and stay away from my sister]
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 12:50 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Rec
Holy hell. I’m laughing so hard/.. I van’t tyupe/./
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:51 AM PST up reply actions
I love Mikes candidness and sincerity in that commercial.
it’s overwhelming and brings me to tears. im crying right now. softly, but im crying.
"I saw him in the face"
by RoodiePhirnandizz on Jan 26, 2009 12:49 AM PST up reply actions
I'm not surprised
you’re one of our more emotional members… and I like that about you.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 12:50 AM PST up reply actions
haha thanks babs
"I saw him in the face"
by RoodiePhirnandizz on Jan 26, 2009 12:52 AM PST up reply actions
Is there a "weeping" willow in your pants
or is it more of a Giant Sequoia?
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 12:52 AM PST up reply actions
Is your gf not allowed to let her phone ring at work
or why is it always on vibrate?
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:05 AM PST up reply actions
I am sorrowful in my leiderhosen.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 12:51 AM PST up reply actions
hey, you lost WWII
and we say you’re not allowed to wear that any more… get some Levis
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 12:52 AM PST up reply actions
like Ehlo
you want to be skee-lo… like Ehlo…
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:59 AM PST up reply actions
Who wouldn't want to be a Washington State University graduate and ...
get paid to do color commentary for Gonzaga Bulldogs basketball games?
John Stockon?
I’m guessing… or Josh Swogger.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 2:21 AM PST up reply actions
No, Stockton went to Gonzaga.
Jerryd Bayless has two emotions: Kill and Win.
"I want to put points on your face."
-Rudy to Pau Gasol
NorrisHopper30: "someone injure pubert jones"
by rockingharder on Jan 26, 2009 7:29 PM PST up reply actions
good on you, dave
its now a multilingual BE
by Bandwagon Fan since 1972 on Jan 26, 2009 1:00 AM PST reply actions
One of those languages being "Sounds stupid but isn't"
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:01 AM PST up reply actions
he did say that
he said it hurts the first time, but then it starts to feel good after that.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:13 AM PST up reply actions
should we REC her 'til she's green?
[and what exactly does that mean?]
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:23 AM PST up reply actions
rec me if you think someone's gonna be banned by tommorow afternoon
by BR7formvp on Jan 26, 2009 1:11 AM PST reply actions 5 recs
Oooh ooh!
Can it be me>>>!!!????!?!?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:11 AM PST up reply actions
must have allready happened,
cuz other then lao and hail, i dont see anything that bad, and even their not truly bad, just angry and …
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:56 PM PST up reply actions
That's like a bad accident
you can’t help but look…
"Rudy’s flashy passes had the place whispering to each other like we were in junior high" ~BlazermaniacAndy
by courtsideerrandboy on Jan 26, 2009 1:12 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
To all:
Am I coming off crazy here? Or am I just an example of a typical anti-fatty person taken to a bit of an edge?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
Nah. You're okay. Just passionate about your opinion.
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
Thanks.
People were saying I was drinking and posting. Almostg true. I’m trying to get there.
Man, Fatty has his defenders, don’t he?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:22 AM PST up reply actions
lololol
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:59 PM PST up reply actions
your not coming off as crazy,
but you are coming off a little abrasive and self important and ignorent. maybee with a touch of entitlement that you really have no buiseness to whats so ever, but i wouldnt spit on you becouse of it.
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:58 PM PST up reply actions
I worked at this gas station
and every week there was a vicious accident on the corner. People beating lights turning left, no turn lanes. Boom. Boom. Boom.
After awhile, if you were busy, you didn’t even look up.
a person dies every 16 seconds
You can’t just stop what you’re doing every 16 second and acknowledge them… you’ve got to keep going in life and let the chips and other people fall where they may.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:18 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Unless it's you
Then you kinda gotta take an accounting…
Like Enron, but different…
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:19 AM PST up reply actions
Yeah, like Enron
If you got to live out three more years in mansions around beautiful objects d’art acquired by stealing from grandmothers who could chose dying or turning off the AC and never seeing the inside of your earthly hell.
Losing?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:26 AM PST up reply actions
Funny
how just a little bit of Fatty brings out the extra-special trolling. He’s like a flame to moths.
I suggest anyone who has serious questions about the post consider it like anchovies on a pizza. Not everyone likes them…some hate them. But they don’t get ordered that often.
The name-calling is still a no-no for those responding in this thread. I’ve been nice and just deleted stuff so far but I’m about at my limit here. Play nicer.
—Dave
by Dave on Jan 26, 2009 1:33 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
Did I get deleted? Haha! I feel like I've arrived! Sorry Dave. I'll try to be good.
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
Everything under
a deleted comment goes with it. So you may have had comments deleted indirectly because you responded to a comment that got deleted.
—Dave
I, uh, mostly blame my liberal use of asterisks for those comments being deleted earlier today.
That’s a good thing, though, since regardless of the implied vulgarity everything had spun out of control like a car manned by a drunk driver that’s careening into a ditch. It was a heated exchange.
your fault
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:45 AM PST up reply actions
Dave,
How often are you planning on doing a fatty column? And what exactly are your motivations for doing this?
Thank the seven Gods
Really, I was about to send you a huge, huffy e-mail.
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:40 AM PST up reply actions
Get a life, man
It’s in honor of the Clippers game. Can’t anyone see that?
When I rule the world, everyone will know how to use Excel.
Did you really just try and inslult me?
Really?
Really?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:43 AM PST up reply actions
hmmm
What, then, do I not posess the right to criticize? I know I will not criticize poor spelling (I type too fast for that) but, really, what?!?!?!?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:48 AM PST up reply actions
Because you are being too edgy to call anyone else out for the same
I am not saying that’s bad, I am just saying it doesn’t work.
No, he really didn't much
And your nifty Bilbo Baggings quote is about all that’s saving you right now. Step back from the precipice. Have some cocoa and think happy thoughts.
—Dave
I think he's that popular new ...
… dwarf porn star.
I hear even Jenna Jamison is considering waiving her ban on doing it with guys not her husband to do a pic with him.
hakkaa päälle !
link?
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
Insult?
Of course not. I could have called you an Englishman or something really dastardly like that.
When I rule the world, everyone will know how to use Excel.
INCLUSIVENESS
One of the best things about Blazers Edge is the inclusive nature the site thrives on. Blazer fans of all stripes, as long as they can be respectful.
Fatty crossed the line SOMETIMES, but can be yanked back on course and will be the Good Fatty that says smart stuff in a sometimes-hard-to-read package. He’ll dip into Gollum territory at times (I think Dave termed it that way long ago, as well), but is redeemable.
Fatty is the perfect embodiment of someone who would be tossed aside at other websites, treated with scorn and ridicule, turning into a contributing member of a site with enough olive branches and stern reprimands from when fatty tested the electric fence too much.
Fatty still gets a rise out of people with his style (he certainly didn’t SAY anything people would greatly disagree with in this post), but once they’re accustomed to it, it becomes part of the overall ambience of the site. Also, fatty since fatty has become known the world over BECAUSE of his style, so if one dislikes he gets lots of attention, just get some style and that attention will be yours as well.
If you don’t want “that sort of attention” anyways, well then… why do you care?
Fatty is Fatty, he stays true to his word and to his own opinion. He doesn’t flip flop without good reason. He does think out his opinions and why he is saying them. His gruff exterior can’t hide the heart of a saint!
Mortimer
eh
you’re the boss. My only objection is that we live in a PC world where finding humor in the way people present their information is poor form. It detracts from the value of the message (if there was any to begin with). So my thought is that if fatty got his column because of the way he writes rather than what he writes, it isn’t really appropriate to put him on a big stage for entertainment value.
by premthegrem on Jan 26, 2009 1:45 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Crap
Why can’t I just write like you?
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:46 AM PST up reply actions
because I attempted to compress my objections into one point,
rather than spread them out in 50 short comments?
by premthegrem on Jan 26, 2009 1:48 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
I'm pretty sure Fatty knows
that his writing style gets him attention.
Seriously…he’s got a gift. I have never, ever met anyone who can make my head hurt just using typed characters. By the time I’m six lines into a Fatty “paragraph” I’m practically having a seizure. I don’t know how he does that. It’s like you try to follow and then all of a sudden…such pressure on the head. And yet he’s not messing around or typing fluff. He’s just saying stuff.
—Dave
check maid tu rek's IP address
i’m pretty sure him and fatty come from the same planet
- Rookie fe[a]st 2009 -
i am flattered
lol
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
I mean
This was precisely what I was trying to say from the start!
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:49 AM PST up reply actions
Agreed premthegrem
You summarized my thoughts precisely. I just think pandering to the lowest common denominator hurts Blazer’s Edge as a community. We should be elevating our mental game just as the Blazers need to bump up their defense as the play-offs approach.
I love anchovies...
Its really a shame that more west coast places don’t have them.
Try ordering anchovies from Pizza Hut some time… bummer.
I heart taxes.
Then you should check out a Korean grocery store.
Sometimes you can find these dried anchovies that have been kim’chee’d . Both salty and spicy. I like the dried squid done the same way even better.
hakkaa päälle !
i just got hear, so i hope i get to stay
ill be good
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
[not to mention the mind altering substances]
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:43 AM PST up reply actions
Wow
2 1/2 hours late at night Portland time, 196 comments not even counting the ones Dave deleted. Impressive.
Dave, is that YOU in the picture next to fatty?
When I rule the world, everyone will know how to use Excel.
What a relief
I was afraid my theory was wrong for a moment there.
http://www.blazersedge.com/2007/8/25/122240/713
Actually, now that fatty is on the front page, I know it is true. Why else would Dave possibly consider posting fatty’s stuff there?
When I rule the world, everyone will know how to use Excel.
So, what are you saying...
Jerryd Bayless has two emotions: Kill and Win.
"I want to put points on your face."
-Rudy to Pau Gasol
NorrisHopper30: "someone injure pubert jones"
by rockingharder on Jan 26, 2009 7:46 PM PST up reply actions
I spent almost 15 years working from 6pm to 6am and I still haven't gotten the hang
of a diurnal schedule. Basically I have no schedule now.
"Aneurysm".
When Outlaw wins a game on a last-second shot, it’s called an "annthefaneurysm". QualityPie
Actually Fatty surprises me.
He looks quite dapper in those grey pants and black shirt. Who’d feature Ric Bucher would be sporting a Blazer jersey?
Spanish Main: The point of departure for enormous wealth in the form of gold, silver, gems, spices, hardwoods, hides, alley-oops, assists and three pointers.
Good god
A fatty column AND 212 comments? Too much to read man, too much to read.
by neutroticblazerfan on Jan 26, 2009 1:44 AM PST reply actions
Sez the neurotic blazer fan...
I know less than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
by haildablazer on Jan 26, 2009 1:47 AM PST up reply actions
We had a gutter taking away our sins. Tom took it in charge until the Junk Drawer was born.
Not surprisingly we need to replace that function. Fatty is a very good selection. But nothing can replace how Tom and his followers worked in daily basis.
Sergio + Rudy = 16
Sergio + Bayless = 16
Batum 8+8=16
Fatty just appears shorter
due to the proportion we expect a person to have… he figure warps the camera lense and our senses.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:52 AM PST up reply actions
Sorry but you don't measure up to your name ;)
Sergio + Rudy = 16
Sergio + Bayless = 16
Batum 8+8=16
I know, not in Internet terms
But you would be amazed how many site editors have reacted pissed just when seeing “troll” in a nickname to make posts on their sites :)
you're the most Norsk-like
but best? eh… you rely on facts and evidence too much… the best trolls rely on pure mojo (football, Booby Miles)…
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 1:54 AM PST up reply actions
That "column" was a NIGHTMARE
Your sadistic side is really coming through tonight Dave…sheesh, rough trade. I think our collective IQ just went down 70 points and damn it, that’s about all I had to begin with…thanks for that.
Dang... somehow the serious comments about ATF and cancer
got swept up in the trolling part of this….
entertainment value? YES
and what ARE we here for fellow fans?
a little relief from reality?#
fatty gives us that.
#(if nba basketball is your reality and you aren’t making money at it, well….)
by Bandwagon Fan since 1972 on Jan 26, 2009 1:57 AM PST reply actions
I think one thing is clear
Fatty is art.
His writing is some kind of not entirely pleasant (and not at all classical) art, but art nonetheless. I mean, look at all this. From one post.
—Dave
by Dave on Jan 26, 2009 1:58 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Eye of the Beholder
I guess that just proves that one person’s art is is another’s, well, never mind.
I have nothing against his opinions or him, but I wish he’d communicate more clearly so I don’t have to pop 2 Tylenols and some Dramamine to get through his article.
As someone with an education in journalism, it not only gives me a headache, but I get a little nauseous trying to make it through his points. Clear communication of ideas shouldn’t involve such discomfort!
I’ve been reading and occasionally posting here for a long time, and remember the fervor over Fatty (never quite understood it). BE is your baby, Dave..so do what you will..but I’m going to choose to skip this and read more thoughtful and easily understood analysis found elsewhere on BE.
by SloppyJoe on Jan 26, 2009 8:18 AM PST up reply actions 2 recs
"Book-its" are like "tell-me-what-they-wons". You never have enough! :)
Sergio + Rudy = 16
Sergio + Bayless = 16
Batum 8+8=16
Does anyone else remember "Book It" from elementary school?
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 2:16 AM PST up reply actions
The Euros are just getting to work
and figuring out that they don’t want to actually work.
They showed up in the last 30-45 minutes.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 2:11 AM PST up reply actions
Dave, I gotta say that
often you are just amazing! This is almost Obama-like in reaching out to unite the diverse landscape that is Blazers Edge.
And welcome back, Fatty! I agree with much of what you said. (At least I think I do :).
Fatty I love your style man, but I hope you never make a collabo with Maid Tu Rek's free spirit of spelling
Future generations would need a Rosetta stone to decipher and understand that.
By the way, Fatty’s creative way of writing works surprisingly well with speed reading. Just let it flow, i.e. without trying to read out all words aloud in your own voice in your mind. Not really necessary since this post has a very clear structure, but it worked well.
I believe we have the english section of the fatty rosseta stone
a few of us translated as best we could. Now we just need a french version
"It’s a good ol’ fashioned Rip City beat down!"
fatty
we shood teem up
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
I love everyone's reaction to fatty's "style"....
Having sifted through my fair share of fatty posts, I got through this one just fine. Reading fatty-grammar just takes a little adjusting, the content is there though if you have the patience. I think this is a great idea by the way, fatty always polarizes the BEdge and makes for some interesting conversation. For those who struggled, here are some useful tips on reading a fatty post:
1) ? = question. Don’t expect to see the question mark to be used as any sort of form of punctuation.
2) * = and. This one is my favorite. I have no idea where fatty thought that one up. Maybe the 7 key is just a little too far away while holding down shift?
3) Ignore all organizational attempts by nunything he posts is generally a mess of thoughts thrown together like stir fry. Be prepared for any new sentence to be totally unrelated to the preceding one. Rinse and Repeat until you have fought through the whole thing….
Good Luck and thanks for the post fatty!…
RUDY > MJ
Today we have a special threat on Blazersedge ;)
Sergio + Rudy = 16
Sergio + Bayless = 16
Batum 8+8=16
Ask Dave. I only quoted Dave´s first phrase.
Well, I remind you that “h” doesn´t sound in Spanish, so that the “h” plus doesn´t change anything. And it fits well with tha context.
Sergio + Rudy = 16
Sergio + Bayless = 16
Batum 8+8=16
The bald guy in the background
standing behind Ric “The Slick Tricky Dick” Bucher and Travis Outlaw’s cousin.
by Bust a Bucket on Jan 26, 2009 5:28 AM PST up reply actions
thanks!
it is nice to see him back. It is remarkable that he kept up the self-imposed suspension.
This is also a helpful reminder that this is a Blog and maybe I should not take my participation here too seriously. Nobody is paying me to read or write this stuff; I am here because I love the topic. If I talked about the Blazers in my daily life as much as I think about the Blazers, I would soon find myself in four-point restraints.
"its tough to play with one eye, unless you're a pirate." Delonte West
"una canasta a Pau en la cara" Rudy
I have respect for Fatty.
I think Jscot made the same point earlier, that he gave his word on something and followed through on it. It’s sad that a quality like that is so rare. I think he took all his grammar and punctuation skill points and put them into integrity. That said, I don’t always agree with Fatty’s points. It’s about 50/50 with me. But whether I agree with him or not, his points are almost always worth discussing.
Yes, I think the Blazers as an all-defensive team would make Portland a juggernaut. Make it so.
No, I don’t think we need to find another third option. Oden will be fine in a couple of years.
But sadly, people get so wrapped up in the presentation, that they miss the diamonds in the rough. This is one of those cases. Yes, Fatty is hard to read. Yes, his grammar makes me shudder. But I’ve found that he has generally been worth sorting through in order to hear what he has to say.
Current Titles:
Official Blazer's Edge Poet Co-Laureate for the 2008-2009 Season
Official Blazer's Edge Ambassador to the Milwaukee Bucks
Unofficial Blazer's Edge Grammar Magister
Unofficial Blazer's Edge Grumpy Ol' Curmudgeon
Chaplain of the Jarrett Jack Jump-Pass Memorial Fanclub
by T Darkstar on Jan 26, 2009 6:30 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
Hear! Hear!
My sentiments exactly. I feel the same about his content and style.
I’ll add that unlike that blowhard on Fox, O’Reilly, who claimed he’d leave the air if we didn’t find WMD’s in Iraq but still plagues America with his views, the constant poster fatty stayed off the site during one of the more exciting periods to date.
Spanish Main: The point of departure for enormous wealth in the form of gold, silver, gems, spices, hardwoods, hides, alley-oops, assists and three pointers.
I prefer the short quick fatty
rather than the long version
but thats just me
rock on
"..[Travis Outlaw] could jump, grab a rafter, eat a sandwich, and then dunk.."
tmundal 12/30/07
Fatty - Nice job - Feel free to express yourself.
Disregard all the grammar stuff here. It ain’t like anyone is immune from poor grammar. English expression shouldn’t be limited to a pre-conformed set of rules known by nobody and practiced by none.
Irie mon!
Fatty
Welcome back.
Dave, thank you for featuring Fatty, a man of conviction and contrasting style. I like it.
Off to the optometrist…. :)
You fooled me, Dave.
My page loaded with just enough screen to see Ric Bucher’s mug at the bottom but not enough to see the significantly shorter fatty. When you mentioned the “new, occasional guest columnist” in your opening paragraph I thought, whoa, this place has really gone big time.
Not that I’m a huge Ric Bucher fan or anything, but wow, what a let down.
Haha!
I seriously laughed out loud at work when I checked in on the ol’ BE this morning. I could only get through a couple of lines of Fatty’s post, but it made my day seeing that on the front page. Thanks, Dave!
I like it ..... A LOT
nice work Fatty. Its straight from the cuff and honest. What else could you want? For those who find fault in the grammar, I certainly do not. Fatty’s particular style is unmistakably pure E-bonics of an unrepentant variety, I mean who mispells riff-riff as rift-raft,…. awsome. He always keeps it clean enough by not tossing in any LOL’s, <3’s, or :)’s….
How many posters have come in and tried to make a name for themselves imitating Fatty’s style? Its a shame too because I seriously doubt Fatty PURPOSEFULLY misspells anything, a trait that is really annoying.
Keep up the good work Fattay.
"When it comes to compliments, women are ravenous, bloodsucking monsters, always wanting more, more, more! And if you give it to 'em, you'll get plenty back in return." -- Homer
I'll disagree on the not purposefully misspelling ...
… the guy comes across as far to intelligent to spell poorly.
But then I don’t recall seeing spelling as an issue with fatty’s posts. Puncuation, but not spelling.
hakkaa päälle !
dictionary spelling is NOT an accurate integence boramator
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
I don't know whether to laugh or scream at this.
I am tempeted to as what a boramator is. Possible definitions:
A device designed to measure a person or topic’s ability to bore people – as in timg once again has pegged the boramator.
A machine used for tunneling and/or digging holes – as in the contractor has been experiencing problems with the boramator breaking down , leading to project delays and cost overruns.
hakkaa päälle !
help me out with "integence"
imitation is said to be the sincerest form of flattery…. it bothers me tho for some reason…. oh well.
"When it comes to compliments, women are ravenous, bloodsucking monsters, always wanting more, more, more! And if you give it to 'em, you'll get plenty back in return." -- Homer
yeah, its bad
whats worse is that it took me a while before i cought on to just how bad
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
hmmm
youve got me wondering now. im not really even sure that boramator is a real word, but i cant get over the idea that it is. Did i just mispel it, or did i just try and make up a word?
i generally and generusly assume your intelligence, as youve displayed more then just a commen insight into this whole trip called life, but on the off chance that your not certain of my intent, i meant it as a “meter to measure”.
i find screaming acceptible
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
I respect you
But eventually content will be limited by form. Without respect for the form, the language, the tools with which hear you are choosing to communicate, how can communication happen?
Especially in the blog-o-sphere?
Respect the tools you use.
If you don’t like these, find other tools, please.
I recognized the word you intended.
You were not far off on the spelling – just two letters transposed.
Barometer – a device for measuring or indicating barometric pressure.
What was funny was the word you created with the transposition.
hakkaa päälle !
FATTY!! Glad you're back!
I like your style. I thought you’d be a lot older. I thought you said something about living out East hanging around a smoky bar….
Didn’t realize I was an old poster.
Anyway, thanks for the post.
he has some good points
About MJ taking time to develop, but he didn’t mention how the 77 blazers didn’t take time to gel, granted it was a different era.
Also interesting was the whole “Nate should be a defensive schemer” and “We need a third guy to go with roy and oden.”
It seems like Nate is already scheming like Pop, and that KP already has been looking for that third piece. Nate is known for being a solid defensive coach (testified by Lebron recently) and KP is known for having a trick up his sleeve to aquire players that you either wouldn’t expect him to be able to get (bayless), or players you wouldn’t expect to be amazing (Batuuuum).
The questioning of Rudy’s mortality and Aldridge’s overall game are two tropes that have been circulating a lot around here, so it’s easy to see why some of fatty’s points are moot (that we need a solid third peice). But it’s cool that he was either trying to address things that he has read on bedge from afar, or if he has been contemplating the same concepts independently form this site.
Either way some fascinating stream of consciousness from someone who obviously cares about the blazers a lot.
- Rookie fe[a]st 2009 -
Trolling? Abrasive???
……………………………. More like Blazer Happy Talk from The Portly One.
"Now with a non-provocative footer!"
For the record
I didn’t technically name call, and neither did pusster1, but pusster attacked fatty’s person. I don’t know fatty but felt like defending him.
- Rookie fe[a]st 2009 -
clearly he types this on a phone
Dave, this isn’t a troll. . . this is fatty.
<3
Sophia
Though patience be a tired mare, yet she will plod. - William Shakespeare
"He should have his face
shaved into the back of his head.. Then there would be no escape" OutlawisRejector on what Bayless' next haircut ought to be...
Should be a "Recommended" Fan Post
Rather than a column.
It was fun to read, but he’s not a writer even in the same ballpark with Ben or Dave. They really write quality stuff. The writers on Bedge are what makes it unique and great. Fatty is welcome here, but shouldn’t be a official column.
Hey Dave,
thanx for inviting me into your home, but that couch should really go over there
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 1:30 PM PST up reply actions 2 recs
To sum up:
Fatty is a nice guy. Most of us adore him.
Fatty has a keen basketball mind. His insights are valuable.
Fatty does not know how or does not care to write in a readable style. This makes his writing very difficult to read.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Dave, no!
Long-time lurker here. I gotta throw in my two cents here.
The internet is a teeming morass of nigh-unreadable crap. Blazer’s Edge is better than that — yours and Ben’s writing style is streamlined, funny, and easy to read. Deliberateness in language and grammar is a big key to this, insignificant as it may seem. Because you know HOW to write, it makes your work effortless to READ.
I’m fervently begging you: Please, please, please, please, PLEASE don’t let message board-style antics seep into the fabric of this site. Make this a one-time experiment.
by trevorthegreat on Jan 26, 2009 10:30 AM PST reply actions 2 recs
His virtual manhood is MINE!
That didn’t hold up his end of our bet…
"Now, you take a bobcat or a Jayhawk. You know they'll run if you give 'em the chance. But when one don't run, why, you shoot him and shoot him quick. Raef's my dog, Pa. I've gotta do what's right..." Old Yeller (1957)
by RoyGoesTheDynamite on Jan 26, 2009 10:50 AM PST reply actions
unreadable
No comment because I could not discern it. Good luck Fatty. – Elgin
I get what I deserve. I deserve what I get. I have it so I deserve it. I deserve
it for I have it. I get what I deserve. What I deserve - what I deserve what
I get. I have it so I deserve. - Gentle Giant
Regarding what Fatty wrote and not how he wrote it
I think the Blazers will be a great defensive team. Nate is a great defensive coach. The problem now is that the Blazers are a team full of offensive oriented players and the Blazer have been winning by playing a little bit of defense and a lot of offense. It doesn’t matter how many times Nate tells the team they need to play better defense to win, if they can win with just offense that’s all they’re going to do. What needs to happen is the team needs to go through a stretch where they see what Nate is telling them is the truth.
I think that is why making the playoff is so important. Only after the Spurs, the Lakers or another team hands the Blazers their butts, will they go, “Oh, so that’s why Nate has been harping on defense for so long.”
In every career I’ve had, and I’ve had a few, someone says, “Just wait until {insert anything here}, and then you’ll see what this job is all about.” I always coasted until I the poo hit the fan, then I buckled down. The Blazers will do that, and it will probably be too late this year. They’ll have an entire summer to think about what they did wrong and come back hungrier next year.
Heck, the Celtics did it last year. Luckily they were veteran enough to turn it up a notch each playoff series, but the Blazers won’t have that experience or knowledge to do that. They’ll most likely let a series slip away.
Besides, winning the NBA finals is like getting a doctorate degree and the Blazers are still in high school. They might be taking some college level classes, but they don’t have the knowledge and experience that is gained by being there.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck was on ice?
I see we share at least one characteristic.
Well two, as we both married Koreans.
I’ve always performed better under the learn / work by torture method. A good smack to the back of my head tends to help me focus. I think that were I to start grade school anytime in the past 10 – 15 years I would have been diagnosed with ADD, bipolarism and perhaps half a dozen other disorders. Fortunately for me, I did not. A smack is much cheaper and in the long run much more effective than drugs for keeping one focused.
hakkaa päälle !
Actually, smack is really expensive...
smack is much cheaper and in the long run much more effective than drugs for keeping one focused.
"Now with a non-provocative footer!"
That explains a lot.
I’m referring to the sort of smack you experience, verses the sort you probably should have experienced.
hakkaa päälle !
I can definitely see what people don't like
its basically like a school classroom with Dave as the teacher. Everyone was participating in the class discussion, except one kid, and everyone felt like they all knew what the subject material was, and then Teacher Dave makes an announcement that the day’s lesson plan was going to be taught by the kid who never participated. And everyone was kind of shocked, because this kid never said anything, and they all felt like they were equals. And then the kid sat down in the teachers desk with all of the pomp and circumstance, and then proceeded to go over the lessons of two weeks ago… And then sat down in shocked silence, as the teacher applauded him and said: wasn’t that great? He brings something totally different to our classroom. And the shocked classroom sat around and stared at each other and thought to themselves, wait who is this teacher person anyways?
Its not that its his writing style or anything like that. People just aren’t happy that he is being given the role of teacher, when he could have just piped up when this was part of the discussion. I like fatty, I like what he brings in the comments, and I like his abrasive style. But, what are you supposed to say to this lesson plan? We should commit to defense… ok. We need a third offensive scoring threat, and Kevin Durant would be that guy… umm…what about that commitment to defense that you were talking about? Love to everybody on Blazersedge…. ummm.. thanks? And presumably you are too busy to grace us with your presence?
All I am saying is that I can see how people would not appreciate this in its form. Yes these are issues that are interesting to discuss, and yes I am glad to see fatty back on this site. But there needs to be some substance to these posts, to warrant their inclusion on the front page. I am not saying analysis like jscot does, giving out barn-burning frustration like jksnake, difficulty of reading his posts like maid tu rek, or even humor similar to tominhawaii. Just something more than ‘this is what i have been thinking about’, then I think people will be happier about his guest post writing status.
From the back of Travis Outlaw's Franz card: Travis leads the team in monstrous thunder dunks, wins awards for post game interviews, and often gets extra points for degree of difficulty.
by TheOdenator on Jan 26, 2009 11:42 AM PST reply actions 6 recs
i feal so special
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
Great analogy - and teacher need to practice - we should let him
Moving from the classroom back chat to the teacher ‘s desk takes some pratice.
It’s a different voice and takes finding. You can’t just be a counter puncher as teacher.
There may be a great substitute teacher in fatty – I don’t know yet but I’m curious to find out.
Ben was being shellacked for some ofhad derisive comment as a Front Pager. He had to
learn that teacher doesn’t do that, that’s classroon chatter.
Give fatty time. Let’s see.
lol...
respect to fatty
respect to dave for throwin down some respect to fatty…
and shame on those that disaprove…..becuase I read fatty….
n he didn’t do anything to deserve the hate he gets other than disregard silly grammer rules, and disagree to agree…
god bless his integrity and may we all one day become as decent of people…
+1
The Faith don't panic, the faith freaks out burns out farms and torchs small villages in the name of The Faith.
Agreed
Nuthin but…
<img src=“”http://s480.photobucket.com/albums/rr162/Expletive-Deleted/?action=view¤t=1229279990507.jpg" target="_blank">
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for fatty
Man, we should forfeit before roy’s hammy explodes, knocking him into LMA’s ear who loses his balance and hits Greg’s knee… - HurraKane212
http://www.nba.com/news/miles_10_080919.html
by maid tu rek on Jan 26, 2009 12:37 PM PST up reply actions
I for one...
Am glad to see Fatty back on the Edge. Yes, it’s like mainlining a telex machine to read some of his posts, but he almost always had good insights (even if we didn’t always see eye-to-eye), and say what you will, he has honor.
Welcome back, Fatty. I’ve missed you!
Punk rock
Fatty is an essential ingredient in BE’s buffet of goodness. But I fear he’s letting the main page pressure by ramping up the coherence factor. A recap of points at the end? Fatty, please. Just let it all hang out. Figuring out what exactly it is your talking about is half the fun!
Oh and haters, act like you know or just move on. You sound like that guy in front of the Jackson Pollack who says “my kid could paint that”. Don’t be that guy.
Egads!
What’s the record for comments for a non-Gameday Thread?
There were only 346 when we won the draft lottery! Say what you will, Fatty certainly stirs things up.
That said, it is a little disheartening to see so much off topic content here. There’s so much content here already that I can’t keep up. I appreciate the sense of community here now, but trying to read this post reminded me of a time when almost all the discussion here was about the Blazers (except Fatty’s posts which inevitably degenerated into trolling and name calling). There are 400 comments here, how many have anything to do with our beloved Blazers.
I love Blazersedge, but I love the Blazers more. I miss the days when basketball discussion and analysis was all that happened here.
Sigh. I feel old.
More Blazing, Less Trailing
by Bretski on Jan 26, 2009 4:43 PM PST reply actions 2 recs
I like egg salad
Couldn't we just play the Timberwolves again instead? That's like being beheaded with a Nerf bat. -Dave with the Laker game preview
by JWise on Jan 26, 2009 5:49 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
Fatty
I would be happy to transcribe your contributions. If you e-mail me your posts, I can edit them to be more accessible.
"Only dunk and go to the defense." Rudy Fernandez
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Now with a non-provocative footer!"
Dear God...why?!?
Jerryd Bayless has two emotions: Kill and Win.
"I want to put points on your face."
-Rudy to Pau Gasol
NorrisHopper30: "someone injure pubert jones"
I unfortunately read this
And wasted 30 mins of time trying to read it. What I feel is what was rehashed by Dave in Summer of 08. Except the Durant part. That was a pretty ironic twist.
Also, and I know this won’t be popular to say, but if Fatty’s writing is a style, then ebonics should become a language.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
I am the stone that builder refused..I am the visual...The inspiration..That made lady sing the blues....I'm the spark that makes your idea bright.....The same spark that lights the dark....So that you can know your left from your right...I am the ballot in your box....The bullet in your gun...The inner glow that lets you know...To call your brother son....The story that just begun...The promise of what's to come...And I'm 'a remain a soldier till the war is won....
Argh
I meant ebonics should become an official language of the US.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
I am the stone that builder refused..I am the visual...The inspiration..That made lady sing the blues....I'm the spark that makes your idea bright.....The same spark that lights the dark....So that you can know your left from your right...I am the ballot in your box....The bullet in your gun...The inner glow that lets you know...To call your brother son....The story that just begun...The promise of what's to come...And I'm 'a remain a soldier till the war is won....
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