Where your junk (posts) belongs on the Sabbath 8/3/08n
by jonestr on Aug 3, 2008 12:42 AM PDT
Email
PrintTime again to fill up the junk drawer with the bile of blazers edge. Hopefully you have all repented for your monday-saturday sins and are ready to start a holier and more sanctified version of the junk drawer.
Now, as is so popular in these posts, let me add a few non sequiturs to get things started off right.
I am finally getting a bike with gears on it. I just ordered the last of the parts and then I will be in gear city. My knees hurt and I am tired of being lumped in with hipster trash just because I ride a fixed gear. I get it all ready. I look like a hipster, but I have looked this way for the past 10 years and I am too lazy to change so I am just going to have to ride it out (pun intended.). I loathe hipsters and their garbage music. I am not interested in your silly bands that are just rehashing new wave bands that I previously loathed. Get the Bad Brains s/t and learn what awesomeness really is.
Also, I just watched forgetting Sarah Marshall on Dheepan's recommendation. It was not half bad. I would give it 3.5 starts on netflix if netlix got with the program and gave me the ability to give half star ratings to movies. I also should not have watched this movie as it was very sentimental and made me miss my gf who is out of town right now. I wish I knew how to keep these tears from flowing and this heart from hurting, but I dont.
When is the next Sherman Alexie post going to happen. His stories make me run through a gamut of emotions which scares and entertains me. We are really lucky that he has taken time to acknowledges us at all.
I should probably stop now as stream of conscious writing is for dirty bongo playing beats.
106 comments
|
3 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
can any body be the FIRST
to guess what fraze Dave typed into the anagram thingy-madgigg to come up with this?
"If I was in anyway unclear(,) I am implying that Dave is a serial murder(er)."
---jonestr on Aug 3, 2008 12:25 AM PDT
I am flattered that
I made your signature, and embarrassed by the grammar and spelling mistakes that you pointed out.
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
The last straw! ptwnblzr correcting someones spelling and grammar :) I like it.
The Midnight Rambler
yeah I thought he was the dude with the lousy education
the lousy american education. I read somewhere that he is a tribute to a failed education system.
but I read somewhere else that we’re not sposed to be talking about spelling mistakes on this site. something about taking a brake from calling attention to spelling mistakes and stupid stuff like that.
by Love on Aug 3, 2008 7:43 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
C'mon
ptwnblzr is a good dude. After the big brush up about grammar and what not I was reminded of a sweet Wild Billy Childish poem that I found befitting of the situation
I am the uncorrected
Because I cant spell and refuse to show off with cheap tricks and still allow myself to paint like a monkey I’m not elevated.
Fear me
Because I have no certificates refuse to be educated and my writing style is free true and easy yet I have written novels that discuss the senses of the educated I am not elevated
Fear me
I am gloriously uncorrected and will be coming for you next
I had to transcribe this from a cd so it is probably not the best. Sorry.
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
I agree ptwnblzr is a good dude.
I thought it was obvious that my comment was a joke as I´m one of the worst with spelling and grammar.
The Midnight Rambler
Sometimes I love Ptwn's spelling errors.
I think “fraze” is the way “phrase” should be spelled.
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
The answer is...
more or less in his main post for the weekend.
"I love this game!" -Moonbeam, from 'Rollerball' right before he was knocked into a permanent coma
The internet is corrupting me
Up until 15 seconds ago, I always thought your name started with some variation of pwn with the t making it future tense somehow and the overall implication being that Blazers were gonna do some “ptwn”ing.
Whattaya mean, that's what he was TRYING to spell...
"He shoots....................... he scores!!!"
join me in the Team USA thread
they are playing Russia right now.
http://www.blazersedge.com/2008/7/31/583878/team-usa-update-and-discus
Boomshakalaka
Mr. inHawaii is so charitable. It's wonderful.
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
I am getting on a bus
to hawaii right now to kick your teeth in FF (you know what it means.)
(Hopefully it is obvious, but I am just kidding (possibly said in the Ferasito voice of Fred Armissen.)
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
actually it is
Fatty (Mc)Fatterson as I thought that it would hurt your feelings more.
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
That's the funny thing about me
My real mom is a tramp and my step mom is a b-word. So if you call me an SOB, I’ll give you a high five. I knew you were kidding but if I make someone mad enough to call me names, I just laugh because it means I made someone mad by being silly. I love that. I might get upset if you said hateful stuff about my wife. I doubt that as well since no one here knows my wife. That’s the beauty of the internet.
- Tom
My son used to get in trouble all the time in grade school
for calling the other boys homo sapiens and homo erectus. He thought it was very funny. Luckily for him he was bigger than his classmates even though he was always the youngest.
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
My dumb cousin would say
GD, river damn. Because in his mind clarifying that somehow made it OK.
- Tom
"...since no one here knows my wife"? It can´t be more wrong.
We know her well, at least the most important thing, she married you. That makes her a very important woman in my book.
The Midnight Rambler
Oh yeah, and everyone should know about her pleasure pillows.
That and farting should be in the top 10 things I mention at Blazers Edge.
- Tom
I believe you posted pictures of Khara's pleasure pillows awhile back.
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
Ann you are messing with my head
at first I assumed you were single.
Then a sweetie turned up. Then he was your husband.
Now there’s a son!
(I’m not even vaguely insinuating your story is changing, just that with each new tidbit, I have to rearrange my mental image)
Haha! It's this stupid internet thing. In person I would never dream of
revealing personal details about myself because I’m pretty much a recluse except when I can’t be. I’ve been married to my sweetie for over 20 years. I’m not trying to be enigmatic, I just sort of accidentally give up stuff when there is context (in my mind) to the comments I read. This is the first and only blog I’ve ever been a part of. It’s amusing how quickly I started feeling like part of an extended family. Here’s how I see you. You’re a young professional woman who’s quietly confident in your abilities and you’re satisfied with your life and your relationships with others. Here’s what I think I know about you. You’re very intelligent. You’ve revealed that you’re an animal lover and volunteer your time to make their lives better. I think you’re a teacher? Your father is a physician?
You don’t make many comments but I always read them when I see them because I enjoy your perspective.
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
ooh ooh do me
come on pleaaase!
Homer: "Oh no!! A Bear is eating my father!." (On seeing Selma kissing Grampa)
haha you called me young!
Sophia makes me feel old, so I’m going to take that young and run with it!
Personal information on line is a funny thing.
Since I’m in Portland and attend mucho Blazers games, I imagine that I’ll meet some people from here eventually, but I’m still reluctant to post much identifying information. TIH clearly doesn’t share my reluctance.
I am gonna be in section 332
I will look for you…..uh…do you bring your cat to games?
Homer: "Oh no!! A Bear is eating my father!." (On seeing Selma kissing Grampa)
You too?
Gonna be the BEst section!
I’m bringing my grandson. I will not allow him to bring his cat.
"We, as Blazer fans, are perhaps the luckiest fans in the league."-Idog1976, July 19.
sweet!!
I am allergic to cats….sad but true
Homer: "Oh no!! A Bear is eating my father!." (On seeing Selma kissing Grampa)
I am going to start calling you an
SOB as I love a good high five. I have started a high five’n trend at work that seems to have infinite momentum.
I wouldnt say hateful things about your wife as that is DB thing to do. Even though I am DB I still wont do it.
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
Since it's the weekend and no one reads this
Who at Blazer’s Edge do you really hate? I heard annthefan hates Dheepan.
- Tom
Yeah, I hate Dheepan because he's way too young to be so dang smart. It's just wrong.
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
In a typical Orwellian style Dave has opened the ...
... they are keeping an eye on us...
... I think I´ve just received an email from them… don´t forget me…call International Amnesty or something…ARRRRGGGGG
The Midnight Rambler
I think we have all committed the original sin
of posting on o-live before posting on BE.
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
Kid's Cereals
The other day at work I saw a lady eating something that looks like Golden Grahams. That gave me a craving for Golden Grahams and I had to go to three stores before I could find some.
What’s your favorite kid’s cereal?
- Tom
Cap'n Crunch!
Without Crunchberries. They’re good too, but I’m a Crunch purist.
Asked his specialty in the kitchen, Oden paused and said, "Hamburger Helper and tuna fish."
Exactly right....just say no to crunchberries
weirdly….I do like Lucky Charms with the marshmellow-esque little nuggets
Homer: "Oh no!! A Bear is eating my father!." (On seeing Selma kissing Grampa)
L@kers sign guard Dwayne Mitchell
Report. Apparently played for the Iowa Energy in the D-League last year, then for strong German club Bamberg. I’ve never heard of him. Might be the next Coby Karl: Theoretically a nice player who never plays behind Kobe and Vujacic.
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
Sherman and LA Fake
For BEdge wanting an Alexie -
http://www.laweekly.com/news/news/fake-memoirist-channels-sherman-alexie/18520/
Cave Canem!
by Caveowl on Aug 3, 2008 9:06 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Thank you for posting this.
They consider themselves forward thinking in Portland from what friends tell me. Apparently they have this global warming issue handled. They’ve found ways to end your life as a profit making venture. And they’re hip to counter culture icons.
by NBA Observer on Jun 27, 2008
wow!
what a great find…
it’s a small world…
we know we’re in for it if his blog comments start getting plagiarized too
"You'd rather say 'whoa' than 'giddyup.'" ~ Dean Demopoulos
Did you read SAlexie
trip to Eugene link, too, at the bottom of the fake story. It brought TiH to mind … and the ad for kayak-ing the LA river seemed to appropriate.
Cave Canem!
the sabbath is actually saturday
the 7th day of the week. sunday is the start of the week
in other news, i just woke up and i have to go to work in fifteen minutes :(
Goodbye blue Monday
whatever dude
tell it to the 7th day adventists
also dont Jehovah’s Witnesses church it up on friday?
I like to go on tuesdays as it is less crowded
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
I suppose in
Oregon it isnt as they have the lowest church attendance in the union, but here in new Mexico everyone is catholic so it is a perfect time for a bike ride.
The Super Bowl is also an awesome bike riding day
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
Same reason
I dont like the coast on weekends,too many kooks
by southern oregon on Aug 3, 2008 10:12 PM PDT up reply actions
Yeah!
That’s what I thought; I was just about to ask this question to some of the theologians in the room.
Jerryd Bayless has two emotions: Kill and Win.
"I think it’s going to be very beautiful game next year."
-Nicolas Batum
by rockingharder on Aug 3, 2008 4:36 PM PDT up reply actions
I just got here, and someone already beat me to it.
Saturday is the Sabbath. It has been for thousands of years of Jewish practice. Sunday became the day of worship in the early Christian church because of Jesus’ claims to be “Lord of the Sabbath” (Like Lord of the Dance, but way better; however, not in the least bit like Lord of the Flies). However, when Jesus didn’t return as William Miller had predicted in 1844, some decided that it was because the Sabbath was being incorrectly held (well, basically), and began worshipping on Saturdays, and the seventh-day adventist denomination was born.
What has confused people is the Third Commandment (Or in the American Protestant tradition, Fourth). Since it’s in the Ten Commandments, churches tend to figure that they are keeping it, and often confuse the Sabbath with Sunday.
This is really just the tip of the iceberg on this subject, but I could go on forever about it and bore people to tears. I may already have.
One of Two Official Blazer's Edge Poets Laureate for the 2008-2009 Season
"In vino veritas." - Latin proverb
"Ich sitze hier und trinke mein gutes Wittenbergisch Bier und das Reich Gottes kommt von ganz alleine" - Martin Luther
"μηκέτι ὑδροπότει, ἀλλὰ οἴνῳ ὀλίγῳ χρῶ διὰ τὸν στόμαχον καὶ τὰς πυκνάς σου ἀσθενείας." - 1 Timothy 5:23
Grammar Police Alert:
I should have capitalized Seventh-Day Adventist. There’s probably more.
I figure that if I police myself this strictly, then I have some clout when other people butcher the American language.
One of Two Official Blazer's Edge Poets Laureate for the 2008-2009 Season
"In vino veritas." - Latin proverb
"Ich sitze hier und trinke mein gutes Wittenbergisch Bier und das Reich Gottes kommt von ganz alleine" - Martin Luther
"μηκέτι ὑδροπότει, ἀλλὰ οἴνῳ ὀλίγῳ χρῶ διὰ τὸν στόμαχον καὶ τὰς πυκνάς σου ἀσθενείας." - 1 Timothy 5:23
wiping eyes
"If I was in anyway unclear(,) I am implying that Dave is a serial murder(er)."
---jonestr on Aug 3, 2008 12:25 AM PDT
Excellent
Bored to tears in less than ten sentences.
Elizabeth had a partner and he had a rap from the cops, Him and Lenny Suckerpunch were just out Tooling around
by Lizzy Lowblow on Aug 3, 2008 5:15 PM PDT up reply actions
jk
I actually like your seamingly unbiased review of religious interpritation. 2 thumbs up
"If I was in anyway unclear(,) I am implying that Dave is a serial murder(er)."
---jonestr on Aug 3, 2008 12:25 AM PDT
Seemingly unbiased, I assure you.
Only seemingly.
One of Two Official Blazer's Edge Poets Laureate for the 2008-2009 Season
"In vino veritas." - Latin proverb
"Ich sitze hier und trinke mein gutes Wittenbergisch Bier und das Reich Gottes kommt von ganz alleine" - Martin Luther
"μηκέτι ὑδροπότει, ἀλλὰ οἴνῳ ὀλίγῳ χρῶ διὰ τὸν στόμαχον καὶ τὰς πυκνάς σου ἀσθενείας." - 1 Timothy 5:23
American language?
at best shouldnt it be the ‘Merican language.
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
Nice!
Thanks for the brief history lesson.
Jerryd Bayless has two emotions: Kill and Win.
"I think it’s going to be very beautiful game next year."
-Nicolas Batum
by rockingharder on Aug 3, 2008 6:03 PM PDT up reply actions
Here comes the bored to tears part, just because im bored and missery loves company.
The ancient jews kept a lunar calendar, where the year started on the new moon closest to the spring equinox. This means that for a strict translation to our gregorian calender the sabbath would fall on a different day of our week each year. The spring equinox usually falls on or is one day from March 21 (if i remember right). The closest new moon was friday march 7. Plus seven days means the sabbath actually falls on thursday this year, assuming i’ve counted right.
Not like it actually matters tho.
Is this to avoid run ins
with the wolfman or some other such creature that is powered by the moon. If so it seems sensible.
Life is exhausting when you are this stupid.
In case anyone is interested ESPN2 is airing a repeat of the USA vs Russia game
at 1600hrs Pacific.
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
What is that in Oregon?
Homer: "Oh no!! A Bear is eating my father!." (On seeing Selma kissing Grampa)
ok
this is histerikal
the latest on our favorite blazer
"If I was in anyway unclear(,) I am implying that Dave is a serial murder(er)."
---jonestr on Aug 3, 2008 12:25 AM PDT
oops my bad ill go look right now
i did too
"If I was in anyway unclear(,) I am implying that Dave is a serial murder(er)."
---jonestr on Aug 3, 2008 12:25 AM PDT
However the picture shows Durant looking at her posterior
while Oden looks at the ESPY! Best Male Athlete coming up?
NBA exodus continues
Carlos Arroyo signs with Maccabi Tel Aviv in Israel. My Hebrew is nonexistent, but the dude is already on their frontpage.
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
little known fact
that may interest no one…
i tried out for the maccabi tel aviv youth basketball team in, like, 1992 or so. maccabi haifa too.
didn’t end up staying long enough in israel to play the season.
"You'd rather say 'whoa' than 'giddyup.'" ~ Dean Demopoulos
Wow really?
That is kinda pretty cool.
Homer: "Oh no!! A Bear is eating my father!." (On seeing Selma kissing Grampa)
What? When you were nine? Why did I think you're 25?
"Besides, AnntheFan will be here any minute to #25 you." T Darkstar
the youth team....
maccabi = “sports club/association”
the clubs are basically sports academies over there and they have youth teams for just about every school grade. being such a small country they focus on internal development A LOT. think hours of layup lines every afternoon…
at the time they taught the pro team’s offensive/defensive schemes at all levels, with the idea that you would progress all the way through the program and make the main club.
they do this also for soccer and probably other sports.
it’s weird because we don’t have a really good comparison for the structure here in the states.
the two big maccabis at the time were haifa and tel aviv. not sure if that’s still the case today.
sorry should have been more clear about that.
but yep im 24, almost 25.
"You'd rather say 'whoa' than 'giddyup.'" ~ Dean Demopoulos
Yeah, big European soccer and basketball clubs definitely employ this model
Ajax Amsterdam is famous for it. So is Real Madrid. The kids even live “on campus”.
The main difference in Europe is that there is no real formal competition between universities and high schools, at least not anywhere near how it is done in the US / Canada. There are some national and international student competitions, but nothing on television apart from maybe the Oxford – Cambridge boat race. So most future pro athletes start out in amateur clubs, then move on to better training groups or pro clubs if they get “scouted” at camps.
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
New stat measure to rate/rank players: The Model Estimated Value (MEV)
We already now that Points/rebounds/assists per game isn’t the most accurate description of a player’s real value (albeit it’s so easy to understand and thus so popular). So statisticians and other nerds have come up with PER, +/-, Wins produced, On/off value, etc. Now along comes another figure that aims to make players on different positions comparable by just one number: The Model Estimated Value (MEV).
Here is a blog post about it that explains what it is and also provides tables near the bottom ranking the best players of all time and of the last season by PPG, Value Added and MEV per game.
On a first look it seems not a bad measurement and the “inventor” definitely put a lot of thought in it. Although I’m appalled again that Vince Carter is ranked so high, but well, he stuffs his stats. LeBron and especially Chris Paul are very very high up among the best players of all time. Maybe somebody wants to work this into a fanpost at some time. Right now I would say it looks nice and we still have some work to do, as our best MEV player (Roy, just outside top 30) ranks behind three L@kers (Kobe, Gasol, Odom). LMA is just behind Granger and Gay, so not in a bad position.
P.S.: And Joel’s agent should keep the “Value Added” table at hand once his next contract is due for negotiations. “Hey, I’m worth more than this Gasol guy.”
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
New Unis. Is "ugly" too harsh? At least they are not better imho
Notice how the Wolves are going to stress they are in Minnesota, while the Kings now stress they are the Kings.
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
OKC name, logo and jersey still isn't revealed, but Uni Watch had a nice contest.
Here are the finalists. Some others are also really good, but I must say I like this Cyclones design. Probably light years ahead of what the real jerseys will look like. 
They also got a lot of input from disgruntled Seattle fans. This one is hilarious, especially the “alternate”.
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
Orlando Magic new jerseys supposed to have pinstripes again (very broad)
Launching a big “Orlando Magic 20 FANtastic seasons” campaign (“est 1989”).
So, that’s all I currently have in the “what’s new in team outfits” section. And no, I don’t work in the fashion or sports apparel industry. Other news?
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
Minnies Male Model
Is there anyone on the Team, better lookin’ than K-Love in his underwear Trailer Trash Tee 
Elizabeth had a partner and he had a rap from the cops, Him and Lenny Suckerpunch were just out Tooling around
by Lizzy Lowblow on Aug 3, 2008 8:42 PM PDT up reply actions
The Kings one looks fine
The Minny one looks like a printing error. Font too small, too hokie, and I still don’t like the core color of the T-Wolves. It’s a depressing blue and studies have shown most teen suicides had looked at a Minny jersey within 3 days of their death.
If I was a Kings fan who worried about the Vegas owners moving the team to Not-Sacramento, I would definitely not like the change in jersey to ignore the city. That team has always been mega-supported by Sacramento, so I dunno what logic the Maloofs could come up with to move the team, but it’s a worry nonetheless.
Mortimer
If that isn't a classic "Bayless Face" I don't know what is. Although maybe a little more dreamy...
Odenied: Coach, I promise I wasn't running hard ...
Agreed
He can look much meaner than this and in the one I posted the other day. Just because he isn’t smiling doesn’t make it a Bayless Face IMHO. Here it looks like his mind is blank.
"We, as Blazer fans, are perhaps the luckiest fans in the league."-Idog1976, July 19.
I kinda thought he was a cool guy thinkin'
“That photographer’s assistant is really hot!”
Homer: "Oh no!! A Bear is eating my father!." (On seeing Selma kissing Grampa)
He's dreaming of future Bayless faces
This is introspective Jerryd, not ready to murder you and your family Jerryd.
Maybe he’s thinking back to summer league… “Hmm, I wish I drove and shot more and passed less.” I can’t say he would be wrong!
Mortimer
Poor Rick Adelman
Gets back in the coaching saddle and is handed Artest who comes out swinging at Yao.
"We, as Blazer fans, are perhaps the luckiest fans in the league."-Idog1976, July 19.
this is a few days old
Yao made the first comment, Artest responded, now they’ve talked and its fine. I’m not saying there won’t be issues during the season, but Adelman had a great relationship with Artest in Sacramento (Artest has called Rick his favorite coach) and I expect Rick to get a lot out of him this season.
Boomshakalaka
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Recommended FanPosts
Recent FanPosts
FanShots
Quick hits of video, photos, quotes, chats, links and lists that you find around the web.
Recommended FanShots
Recent FanShots
In Association With
Ball Don't Lie - NBA - Yahoo! Sport
- Days of NBA Lives: Wherein Roy Hibbert tap-dances to Maine
- Grizzlies Valentine’s Day cards are the key to love
- Kevin Love would like the NBA to take the MLB’s approach on All-Star games
- Kobe Bryant fires a few hilarious salvos at Jeremy Lin
- Brandon Jennings states the obvious regarding his 2014 free agency, everyone goes nuts
Certain photos copyright © 2012 by Associated Press or Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Associated Press and Getty Images is strictly prohibited.
