FanPost

Shawn Kemp making comeback in Italy

The Reign Man changes his personal forecast from overcast to overseas.

http://nbcsports.msnbc.com/id/26257039/

Kobe:  Hello?

Shawn:  Kobe, this is Shawn Kemp.

Kobe:  Who?

Shawn:  Kemp.  Ever hear of the Reign Man?

Kobe:  Kemp... oh yeah, you played with the Sonics and Blazers, right?

Shawn:  Right! Listen--

Kobe:  Hey, I'm glad you called, man. I'm here in Beijing, and there's this cute German swimmer I'm trying to get to know, if you know what I mean, and you could teach me some phrases to impress her with my, you know, international flair and all.

Shawn:  Uh, Kobe, I don't know any German.

Kobe:  You're kidding! You're from Germany, aren't you? You played for Seattle and Portland, right?

Shawn:  I think you're thinking of Detlef Schrempf...

Kobe:  Oh, maybe you're right. Sorry! What did you say your name is?

Shawn:  Kemp. Shawn Kemp.

Kobe:  Right, right... what can I do for you, Shawn?

Shawn:  Well Kobe, I just signed with a club in Italy, and I know you grew up there, so I thought you could help me get the lay of the land.

Kobe:  Sure, no problem. What do you need to know?

Shawn:  First, how do I get to the local Weight Watchers?

Kobe:  Wow, uh, I don't know, man, I never had to deal with that outfit.

Shawn:  Okay, that's cool. How about Alcoholics Anonymous?

Kobe:  No, can't help you with that one either, sorry, man.

Shawn:  Sex Addicts Anonymous?

Kobe:  How would I know about them?

Shawn:  Drug rehab clinic?

Kobe:  Nope.

Shawn:  Planned Parenthood?

Kobe:  Huh? We're talking about Italy, man!

Shawn:  Discount Diapers?

Kobe:  Vanessa handles that kinda stuff. Look Shawn, I think we exist in different worlds, if you know what I mean. I don't think I can help you.

Shawn:  Yeah, I guess not. Well, thanks anyway Kobe, and good luck bringing home the gold.

Kobe:  Thanks man, call me anytime. Oh, hey, maybe you can tell me something.

Shawn:  Sure, what's that?

Kobe:  What's Detlef's number?