At the end of his article, entitled "61 Things I Learned During The Sonics Trial," Mr. Alexie writes...
60. I just bought a 10-game package for the Portland Trail Blazers. My two best basketball buddies and I are planning our road trips. We kind of feel like the bastard widower who married the hot twentysomething a few months after his wife died. But it's ball, man. It's pro hoops.
61. And hey, I live just a few minutes from Brandon Roy's childhood home and high school, and I taught the man in college, so I think I can justify rooting for him and his Blazers. And Portland is coached by Mr. Sonic, Nate McMillan, and owned by Paul Allen, and—ah, hell, I'm a hoops junkie, man, and I need my fix.
Let me be the first to publicly welcome Mr. Alexie aboard. It's not every day that a National Book Award winner hops on our bandwagon. If he writes about the Blazers even 1% as much as he wrote about the Sonics, we will be truly blessed.
But, here's the problem... he's been a Sonics fan so he's got some catching up to do.
My questions to you are: What must Mr. Alexie know to fully appreciate this team? What inside information, anecdote, or experience is critical to his understanding of the current Blazers? What should Mr. Alexie do between now and the beginning of the season to ensure he gets the most out of his Blazers fandom?
Help me build the "List of Blazers Stuff That New Fan Mr. Sherman Alexie Must Absorb Immediately."
I'll kick it off...
-- Mr. Alexie must know that Travis Outlaw's name should not be needlessly bandied about in trade rumors. There are repercussions.
-- It is critical that Mr. Alexie hone a fully-functional Bayless Face in preparation for the nights we host the Lakers. It must be ready at a moment's notice.
-- Mr. Alexie should sign up for a BlazersEdge commenting account to ensure he gets the most out of his adopted Blazers fandom. (What else did you expect me to say?)
Send in your suggestions .... starting.... now! I will do my best to pass this along to Mr. Alexie himself, so keep that in mind.
-- Ben (email@example.com)