The Official Blazersedge Shamelessly Chauvinist Blazers Thread
I was walking around today trying to think of a good topic for discussion. I had just passed the refrigerator on the way to the drinking glass cupboard when it hit me like a thunderbolt out of the blue: a question so simple and obvious that it makes me ashamed I have never asked it in three-plus years of blogging. I swear I felt so dumb, dumb, DUMB I nearly fell on the floor. "Really, Dave? REALLY? You mean you've NEVER asked that? But it's so OBVIOUS!" Yeah, I know.
I shall remedy this now. The question is this:
Explain to us why the Portland Trail Blazers are clearly, hands down, the best team in the history of the universe.
Note that this can mean, but does not necessarily mean, the current incarnation of the Blazers. It could be just in general too. The point is that everybody with an ounce of sense or discernment knows the Blazers are the best team ever. We've just never talked about why. So here's your chance. Fire away.
--Dave (blazersub@yahoo.com)
P.S. Don't miss Ben's fantastic interview with new OSU head coach Craig Robinson below.
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3 reasons
1) They are from the city of Portland
B) Basketball is the most entertaining sport on the planet
III) Sabonis
And we have the greatest future of any team in the NBA. But how do I know the future? I just do.
by Sabonis4Ever on
May 14, 2008 11:59 PM PDT
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that's pretty close
to my set of reasons as well
by DominicanAvenger on
May 15, 2008 1:36 AM PDT
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Because it is my will.
And in this 4 months of my Blazermania nobody did something to change it and everybody to reinforce it.
Of those powders these muds went out.
by amlmart1 on
May 15, 2008 1:20 AM PDT
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The Blazers are the best team ever because...
1) Kobe Bryant, Karl Malone, Shaq, Bruce Bowen, Bill Laimbeer, Vlade Divac, Tom Chambers, Lamar Odom, and Jeff Hornacek with his face wiping freethrow routine have never played on this team.
2) They offered trading cards of players in specially marked Franz Breads.
3) The Blazers represent everything that is good and wholesome about our universe. That is exactly why tyrant referees like Jake O’Donnell, Violet Palmer, and Steve Javie are jealous of the good and rightous qualities that the Blazers stand for, and feel the need to impose their retched, filthy, stinking, adulterous wills against the Blazers when it comes to making the right calls in pivotal moments of games. For those of you who forget or don’t know who Jake O’Donnell was, I’m pretty sure he was Tim Donaghy’s mentor…he is the referee who singlehandedly screwed Portland out of a road win against the Bulls in Game 6 of the ‘92 Finals….and called an offensive foul against Kevin Duckworth every single time Bill Laimbeer flopped to the ground as if he was just shot during the ‘90 Finals.
On a side note, Bill Laimbeer might singlehandedly be the biggest sinister culprit behind the rediculous ploy of flopping to draw a charge, and the modern game of basketball has been tainted because of it.
4) Mercy Mercy Jerome Kersey
5) Clyde “The Glide” Drexler
6) Rick Adelman’s sideburns in the 1971 season
7) Winning less than 40 games and making it to the playoffs, keeping the long playoff streak in tact (just barely)
8) Terry Porter reminding me of Bald Bull from Punch Out, every time he’d shoot free throws and would puff his cheecks out before shooting.
9) The “Perfect Quarter” against San Antonio, where the Blazers led by 31 points at the end of the 1st quarter.
10) Mike Schuler falling on his butt at the press conference where he was first introduced as the Blazer’s head coach, a prophetic foreshadowing of his eventual head coaching career.
11) The Uncle Cliffy
12) Our Memorial Coliseum is better than Phoenix’s
13) We got the best two players in the 2006 draft.
14) He’s not my vydas, he’s not your vydas, he’s Arvydas
15) We have the best owner in pro sports.
16) We hae the best GM in pro sports.
17) Mike Rice cursed at Steve Javie, and got ejected from the game. (I heard the audio!)
18) Jack Ramsey’s plaid pants.
19) Travis Outlaw and about 8 more years of highlight dunks.
20) The incredible future in store for this team.
And finally the biggest reason the Blazers are the best team in the history of the universe is….......They are not the Los Angeles Lakers.
Yes, I typed that word out in all its’ ugliness, so that you can see the light of the Blazers in contrast to the dirty, dark, wretched, wicked, evil, cancerous, abomination that plays basketball in the wasteland armpit of the United States we’ve come to know as, “Californication”
Can I buy you a fish sandwich?
by silkybrown on
May 15, 2008 2:09 AM PDT
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Yea! Yeeeeaaa!!! You win. Nobody can top your post.
"We comin along." Travis Outlaw
by annthefan on
May 15, 2008 2:26 AM PDT
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Wow
I was going to chime in with my newbie post but you covered just about everything that is good and true about the Blazers… exept the eventual “McBob-Bobbleheads” try saying that 3 times fast lol
by DephlatorMouse on
May 15, 2008 5:11 AM PDT
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Absolutely Spectacular!
This ranks solidly in my top 3 posts of 2008!
Silky Rules!
LMA's reign as "LaMonster of the Low Post" has just begun!
by LaMarvelous on
May 15, 2008 12:16 PM PDT
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Thank you
I’m just posting from the heart.
Can I buy you a fish sandwich?
by silkybrown on
May 15, 2008 1:24 PM PDT
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Awesome
Your post was da bomb. You forgot to mention that the Blazers are the most huggible team in the NBA. Besides Chris Paul, can you think of anyone not on the Blazers, that you would want to hug?
"Reality is for people who can't handle Blazers Edge." - MiledAnimal
by tominhawaii on
May 15, 2008 1:06 PM PDT
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yah
i was the 5th rec
"Could we make a deal right now to make us a 50-win team? No question," Pritchard said. "Will that get us a championship? That’s what we always have to evaluate."
As the great Vonnegut said, more or less... "You are what you pretend to be, so you must be very careful what you pretend to be."
by timbo on Apr 29, 2008 7:33 AM PDT
by ptwnblzr on
May 15, 2008 9:53 PM PDT
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1970 Baby!!
We both came into existence the same year.
That, and they are not the L*#$^s (thanks silkybrown).
"I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany."
by dcblazer on
May 15, 2008 4:54 AM PDT
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shnikies!!!
How could I forget
1) busta-bucket-see em dunk blazer duty super soak it slam it geez it go on queez it go get it got it goood. I don’t really remmember what they said but Nothing tops a full team of Blazers rappin.
2) Rip City Rap City we’re the rappers of the NBA!
3) We hate LA… we hate em! We Hate LA
D.Q. Blazers
by DephlatorMouse on
May 15, 2008 5:16 AM PDT
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Chauvinist Reply
If one grasps the concept of an ever expanding universe, the possibility of endless numbers of alternate universes then one must at least entertain the obscure idea that The Blazers might NOT be hands down, universally accepted, as the best team in the history of the universe. Don’t Panic.
It’s all within the individual. The Blazers are MY best team in the universe, in my universe. Oh, I could make a list. It would be similar to many, different than some but why bother? I grew up watching The Blazers that’s probably really the main reason. However, if I could reach for a semi-intangible, I’ve always liked The Blazers because of our success and our failure. We earned our success, through great trades, great scouting, and great talent obtainment. With the exception of recently “Oden” The Blazers have been a team that has built it’s success, not been handed a “Gasol” on a silver platter. We’ve also bravely and stoicly endured our down cycles. Pulling ourselves up and out of the mire, one Brandon and Lamarcus at a time.
We’re not The L*kers, we’re not The Celtics, or NY. We’re that pesky team out in the NW, that everyone else tends to forget about, or laugh about when we are down, but somehow, sooner or later we are playing in the finals and nobody is laughing. I have to admit, I’ve enjoyed in a way even the down times. What team has had more drama surrounding it? The past few years it got pretty dark but that in of itself is a reason I love this team. In my universe The Blazers are the perfect franchise balance of Success and Struggle. I’ve enjoyed watching the cycle.
"Mother Nature started this fight, I think it's about time we ended it!"
by Krang on
May 15, 2008 6:18 AM PDT
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Why The Best Team Ever? Easy
Because in the summer of 1977, the best “TEAM” ever to band together and win a chamionship was created right here.
The proof was in the parade the next day.
Oh yes, and here we are 31 years later its embers still warmly glowing in us all.
The rest of the universe may not get it, but we know better!
The Oden Era, Day 330
by Heymoe on
May 15, 2008 7:15 AM PDT
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Hands down
The fans. No other team in the NBA has as passionate of a fan base as portland. I suppose that could be contributed to the fact that we only have one professional sports team, but i think if we had multiple teams the passion would be just as strong. You could say portland has a full passion bucket. I love passion.
"The next day in practice, if you sweat, it's going to come out of your pores, regardless. If you ask any coach around the league how many times they have smelled liquor on a player . . . As long as that player is showing up on time, doing the drills and running, that's part of it. But there have been times, yeah. Yeah, you probably smelled liquor on me. But it's not like I'm at practice drunk. I'm totally focused."
-Darius Miles
by Steve Guttenberg on
May 15, 2008 10:07 AM PDT
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Isn't the best team the one that has won the most championships?
I really don’t want to go there.
Maybe 15 years from now they’ll be the best team in the universe.
Let’s just say they’re the best team for me.
by MiledAnimal on
May 15, 2008 10:20 AM PDT
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My son gets to grow up with the best team ever
He is almost 4. Im pretty young myself, and I was lik 6-10 in the Drexler era. Yeah my dad took me to the games and i enjoyed the loud noise and bright lights, and i would clap when my dad would clap. But i wasnt old enough to develope a real passion. That happened when I first saw Sabonis play…HE IS SUCH A G! lol So anyway, we are going 2 TONS of games in 2008-2009 and hopefully I can instill some passion in him so by the time he is 6 he can fully appreciate the championship!!!!!! The blazers are the best b/c we have the best fans.
Hatred is the coward's revenge for being intimidates-Hisea Ballou
by BlazerFan1 on
May 15, 2008 10:23 AM PDT
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In June,1977, I was 14 years old
I could probably stop there and you all would get it (that is what is cool about Blazer fans) but I will continue. I was 14 and growing up in Grants Pass. My dad had discovered the Blazers and the Big Red-Head. I started watching with him and was amazed by that great run they went on (my most vivid memory is Luke’s big ol fist coming from off screen and clobbering Dawkins). I was hooked. However I never think of 77 team as my team. It was my Dad’s team and I was happy to root for them. However ….then 78 happened and the rest was history. I was hooked though and continued to watch. They made the playoffs every year (mostly) but got bumped in the 1st round. Then they grabbed this kid in the draft named Drexler with this awesome nickname (don’t tell me nicknames are lame) and mad leaping ability. Then started filling spots around him (I was in favor of Bowie…why not…I though he was next coming of Walton). The Bowie goes down (and down and down) but the Blazers kept on building that team …Kersey, Porter, and even Duck. Finally in what I figured was a throwaway move…they trade Bowie for Buck Williams. The 89/90 season took me by suprise and those 3 years cemented my love of the team. The Drexler/Porter team was my Blazer team. Mostly because of the dissapointments and then the success and ieven though they ultimately didn’t win the big one….I loved that team and always will.
I have been taking my kids to the games the past few years and I believe that when the Blazers finally get another ring ….the Roy/LMA/Oden team will be my kid’s Blazers (just ask my 8 year old daughter who favorite player is and she will say Roy and Joel “The Thrilla” Przybilla and she says it just that way). I envy them.
The Blazers may not be the best team in the Universe but they so intertwined into my family’s life and heritage that I wouldn’t trade them for anything
"Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors... and miss" Robert A. Heinlein
by 92wastheyear on
May 15, 2008 11:55 AM PDT
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Why? Why?! ....WHY?!?!
If someone has to ask WHY the Blazers are the best anything ever in the history of the universe, then they’ll NEVER get it.
The truth is as blindingly obvious as staring at the sun.
Mortimer
by Mortimer on
May 15, 2008 12:02 PM PDT
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I was born at Portland's Good Sam Hospital, July 1960...
I went to my first Blazer game back when LaRue Martin was a Blazer. I was 16 almost 17 and a student at Beaverton High School when the Blazers won the the Championship. I have followed this team through all of its ups and downs. I have loved this team even when the “JailBlazer” era tested my fanship right to its core. And now as the Blazers enter a new era of Supreme Optimism and I have found new ways to express what it means to me to be a Blazer fan here at BlazersEdge, I must say with all of the heartfelt enthusiasm that I can muster – “IT’S A GREAT DAY TO BE A BLAZER FAN!!!”
LMA's reign as "LaMonster of the Low Post" has just begun!
by LaMarvelous on
May 15, 2008 12:42 PM PDT
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Our logo is the best!
What is that thing anyway?? Also, the team owner is just as big of a fan as any of us.
2-4 the who
by 24thewho on
May 15, 2008 12:54 PM PDT
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It's a ying-yang
A ying-yang of trails being blazed.
Can I buy you a fish sandwich?
by silkybrown on
May 15, 2008 1:23 PM PDT
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Isn't it 5 on 5?
Doesn’t it represent basketball at its purest form, of 5 on 5? 5 white pinwheel thingies playing 5 red pinwheel thingies.
It’s awesome, whatever it is. We can’t ever change—and I’d even support going back to the ‘straight’ pinwheels that don’t angle in. I like the originals.
Mortimer
by Mortimer on
May 15, 2008 2:16 PM PDT
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This is a hard one
It’s like asking why I love my dog or my cat. I just do, because they make me feel good, I care about them, and I want them to be happy and succeed. I don’t know what they can succeed at, since I don’t have kids, you’ll have to work with me on that one. I could have said my wife, except I married her for citizenship.
I can’t think of any other way to put it. They’re family and you love your family no matter what. Even when we had a roster full of knuckleheads, I still loved them. I tried to approach this in a way, where I could convince a fan of another team, to like the Blazers. and I can’t come up with anything. No one is going to convince me to start liking their team.
"Reality is for people who can't handle Blazers Edge." - MiledAnimal
by tominhawaii on
May 15, 2008 1:25 PM PDT
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The Best
1. From Portland, a one pro-sport town in a one pro-sport state. Undivided devotion from the local fanbase.
2. The colors: red, black, silver, white. No embarrassing teals or yellows or purples. Team always looks badass at home or on the road.
3. Kevin Pritchard. Danny Ainge? Puh-leeze.
4. Underrated greats: Bill Walton, Clyde Drexler, Arvydas Sabonis, Rasheed Wallace, Brandon Roy. Guys who come in at 6 or 7 on the ten best lists.
5.< http://youtube.com/watch?v=CE5cLNbt7TI”>Bulls Vs. Blazers, now for the Sega Genesis.
by Jumbo on
May 15, 2008 4:03 PM PDT
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Good Call on the Colors
"Reality is for people who can't handle Blazers Edge." - MiledAnimal
by tominhawaii on
May 15, 2008 4:09 PM PDT
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that is so true
powder blue? Why?!
by Section323 on
May 15, 2008 7:18 PM PDT
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Boy Bands
I have no idea why I know this much about boy bands. I just know that the guys of ‘N Sync, knew they should not buy baby blue clothes, because that was JT’s color.
"Reality is for people who can't handle Blazers Edge." - MiledAnimal
by tominhawaii on
May 15, 2008 9:32 PM PDT
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question
who is Jt?
"Could we make a deal right now to make us a 50-win team? No question," Pritchard said. "Will that get us a championship? That’s what we always have to evaluate."
As the great Vonnegut said, more or less... "You are what you pretend to be, so you must be very careful what you pretend to be."
by timbo on Apr 29, 2008 7:33 AM PDT
by ptwnblzr on
May 15, 2008 10:05 PM PDT
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Answer
Im pretty sure his name was JC. And yes I am ashamed that I know that.
by clydeshairline on
May 15, 2008 10:16 PM PDT
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You Kids
All you had to do was Google. JT is Justin Timberlake. How could you not know that?
"Reality is for people who can't handle Blazers Edge." - MiledAnimal
by tominhawaii on
May 15, 2008 10:22 PM PDT
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JC
There was someone named JC in Nsync though, right? Its weird, I have this odd hope that I’m wrong because then I will have the ability to say I’m ignorant of Nsync. But theres my other side that always wants to be atleast partially right.
by clydeshairline on
May 15, 2008 10:25 PM PDT
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lol
I have been blessed with being just far enough out of the loop to not make the imidiate conection, but now will have to suffer the shame of that knowledge….
"Could we make a deal right now to make us a 50-win team? No question," Pritchard said. "Will that get us a championship? That’s what we always have to evaluate."
As the great Vonnegut said, more or less... "You are what you pretend to be, so you must be very careful what you pretend to be."
by timbo on Apr 29, 2008 7:33 AM PDT
by ptwnblzr on
May 15, 2008 10:26 PM PDT
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I loooooove your name clyde!
"We comin along." Travis Outlaw
by annthefan on
May 15, 2008 10:25 PM PDT
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It's Cool
I know you’re a closet boy band fan. You were talking about my boy, JC Chasez. He is the lead singer of my favorites song (For you Alfredo) by those kids.
"Reality is for people who can't handle Blazers Edge." - MiledAnimal
by tominhawaii on
May 15, 2008 10:27 PM PDT
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middle school
I was in 5th or 6th grade when that Boy band thing really took off. My knowledge of that period of music is almost frightening.
by clydeshairline on
May 15, 2008 10:32 PM PDT
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You are the coolest.
I have a baby, a kid and a teenager inside myself. And the teenager like this one a lot.
Of those powders these muds went out.
by amlmart1 on
May 16, 2008 2:54 AM PDT
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Nice
Boy bands sing the sweetest harmonies. The secret is the eunuch.
Oh where oh were could my Jscot be
The cops took him away from me
He's gone to prison so I've got to be good
So I can see my Jscot when I'll leave this blog
by tominhawaii on
May 16, 2008 10:36 PM PDT
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I don't know
I heard Nick Lache was packing.
"I never worried if there would be an earthquake or something in Oregon, but now I can do." amlmart1
by Sabonis4Ever on
May 16, 2008 11:39 PM PDT
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Best Sports Logo Ever
Seriously, is there any design out there as authentic than the pinwheel? It’s awesome.
by BlazerD on
May 15, 2008 9:41 PM PDT
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I like Minnisota
You know whear they show some trees, and then a wolf, yah thats good. get it? trees=timber and the wolf stand for wolves couse there is more then one tree, right.
We should use the same template and have a ford blaser, no.. even better 5 ford blazers, representing our 5 starters, driving down a long windy trail, with a trophy at the end. We could be the oficial NBA team of the Ford Motor Company...
"Could we make a deal right now to make us a 50-win team? No question," Pritchard said. "Will that get us a championship? That’s what we always have to evaluate."
As the great Vonnegut said, more or less... "You are what you pretend to be, so you must be very careful what you pretend to be."
by timbo on Apr 29, 2008 7:33 AM PDT
by ptwnblzr on
May 15, 2008 10:13 PM PDT
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blazers, representing our five starters,
driving down a windy “trail”, with a thophy at the end. We could be the official NBA team of the Ford Motor Company.
"Could we make a deal right now to make us a 50-win team? No question," Pritchard said. "Will that get us a championship? That’s what we always have to evaluate."
As the great Vonnegut said, more or less... "You are what you pretend to be, so you must be very careful what you pretend to be."
by timbo on Apr 29, 2008 7:33 AM PDT
by ptwnblzr on
May 15, 2008 10:16 PM PDT
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Sorry
I really lost steam when I posted and realised that I don’t know how. I still don’t know why it cut me off and highlighted some in blue. any ways I finished, couse half a lame joke is even worse. Like the girl that forgot the lyrics to the anthem, I will push through my embarressment and finnish the joke.
btw, if anyone can tell me how not to ever do that again, I would be oblidged.
"Could we make a deal right now to make us a 50-win team? No question," Pritchard said. "Will that get us a championship? That’s what we always have to evaluate."
As the great Vonnegut said, more or less... "You are what you pretend to be, so you must be very careful what you pretend to be."
by timbo on Apr 29, 2008 7:33 AM PDT
by ptwnblzr on
May 15, 2008 10:20 PM PDT
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I've found that just about anything can happen here. I've lost stuff when I post
several times.
"We comin along." Travis Outlaw
by annthefan on
May 15, 2008 10:30 PM PDT
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The Greatest
Since this is a chauvinist thread I thought that I would give a chauvinist answer. The Blazers are the greatest team because they are the only team that has both made me cry, as well as sit inside thinking about them on the nicest night in Portland in 8 months
by clydeshairline on
May 15, 2008 10:38 PM PDT
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