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Around SBN: In Crunch Time, Spurs Don't Change Their Game

I Blame The Coaches

I blame all the coaches for the losing, not just Nate.  They players have enough to worry about, so I put the current losses squarely on the shoulders of the coaching staff.  I imagine they are overworked by Nate, so maybe he should take 68.35% of the blame.  

Here is what I am thinking, they already have a Strength and Conditioning Coach, Bobby Medina, and a Shooting Coach, John Townsend.  I think all that the Blazers need are a few more coaches.  I mean if two musicians can coach workouts and shooting, why can't the Blazers look outside the box and hire a few more coaches?

Dave pointed out in an open thread that they Blazers need to be more scrappy.  Why not hire Scrappy-Doo as the Scrappy Coach?  He has not done much in years, so I am sure he is available.

You know what else is missing on the roster?  I'll tell you what is missing, it is the killer instinct.  Give me one good reason, why they should not hire O.J. Simpson, as the Killer Instinct Coach?  I am pretty sure Simpson is looking for work, any work.

Dave also noted yesterday, that they are getting out hustled, why not hire the creator of Hustler magazine, Larry Flynt, to teach this team some hustle?  Flynt should be the Blazers Hustle Coach.

I am sure they need additional coached.  Those are just the coaches that came to me off the top of my head.

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Not what I've heard
I am pretty sure Simpson is looking for work, any work.

I believe that what he's still "looking for" is his wife's real killer. That's gotta be a full time job, right there.

Otherwise, solid work tom. A well researched and impeccably argued diary.  

by knickfan on Feb 23, 2008 4:44 PM PST reply actions  

Looking indeed...
Soon, he'll have searched every golf course in the country. Once those are clear, it'll probably be about time for him to check every NFL memorabilia expo.
Trade Freeland!

by rockingharder on Feb 23, 2008 7:44 PM PST up reply actions  

haha
that made me laugh and giggle
Fernandez,Roy,Outlaw,Aldridge,Oden---wait for it! My Video about BROY7

by soulja2boy on Feb 23, 2008 4:47 PM PST reply actions  

Once again, Tom, you come through
with the answers. I think the Blazers should hire you as the Killer Instinct Witticism Coach. We'd be in contention then.

by annthefan on Feb 23, 2008 4:48 PM PST reply actions  

Block out problem
We must hire Bill Belichick.
I like Brandon Roy, whatever planet he comes from. (Bill Walton?)

by amlmart1 on Feb 23, 2008 4:59 PM PST reply actions  

I think
Bill would make a better video guy if ya know what I mean...
Rudy > MJ

by myemic23 on Feb 23, 2008 5:02 PM PST up reply actions  

I´ve heard
there aren´t secrets for him.
I like Brandon Roy, whatever planet he comes from. (Bill Walton?)

by amlmart1 on Feb 23, 2008 5:08 PM PST up reply actions  

I hear that the Blazers are too soft...
I think that they should stop using Skin So Soft lotion. And they should use that toilet paper that Fred Meyer uses in their bathrooms instead of Charmin, boy that will toughen them up, don't you think?
18 Points, 9 Rebounds, 4 Assists, 3 Steals, 2 Blocks and 0 TOs - LMA's Stats Rookie/Sophmore Game

by LaMarvelous on Feb 23, 2008 5:57 PM PST reply actions  

Good point
I hate to say, "When I was in the navy."  When I was in the navy, I went home from bootcamp to a house full of that TP with lotion in it.  Without the details, I'll just say that tough TP can be better than soft TP.

They called TP in the navy, "John Wayne" because it was tough as hell, and it didn't take crap from anybody.  I guess now they would call it "Dave Blazer" or some ultimate fighter's name.  

"Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand." - Luke from Cool Hand Luke (1967)

by tominhawaii on Feb 23, 2008 10:13 PM PST up reply actions  

With your post
I´m torn between protocol and enjoyment.
I like Brandon Roy, whatever planet he comes from. (Bill Walton?)

by amlmart1 on Feb 24, 2008 2:17 AM PST up reply actions  

Oh Tom....
and your polynesian shenanigans.  Kudos all around gang.

by WarEaglePDX on Feb 23, 2008 6:20 PM PST reply actions  

unhappy with Tom in Hawaii
I know you know what I mean here Tom, so dont go jackanapes on me for venting, unlike the pacifist homers who allow your shenanagins to persist with nary a   wafer   of critisism. You know who Im talking about, the peeps who will clap at anything, you know who I mean.. republicans, right?

So, Foremostly,  you approbating the likes of O.J Simpson into your "thoughts" really bothers me. Its almost AS IF you have forgotten that guy got away with murdering 2 people. Ive read alot of your posts and generally can ha-ha yea funny-funny  your thinking. Not this time. If you think OJ's murder misjustice chaos still elicites some jocularity, I'd be surprised you dont find humor in Ruben's baby-sitter bandit action as well. Why didnt you fire off about RUBENS actions also and suggest THAT karma is responsible for the PTB's recent poor play? Didnt you think of setting the bar as low as you could Tom? Get the air-circulation flowing in that two-story elevator as soon as humanly possible please.

Not ONLY that, you rag on the coaches, all of them. You discredit many simply for having positions within the organization. How are Bobby Medina and John Townsend to blame for each and every PLAYERS failure to come and and win games?

Is every sentence in your post sarcastic? its hard to discern between your seriousness and your jarrett jack like vision of capturing the spotlight for yourself.

Why are you posting inflammatory remarks anyways? I really feel set off by this "I blame the coaches" banter.

talk to the b

by bow4meow on Feb 23, 2008 10:35 PM PST reply actions  

Unfair
...the pacifist homers who allow your shenanagins to persist with nary a   wafer   of critisism.

I don't see why Von Wafer needs to be dragged into this. Dude hasn't even been on the team for two days and he's already being summoned upon to smoke tom out of his little grass shack.

Uh oh... inadvertent subliminal message there... think I feel a case of the munchies coming on...

by knickfan on Feb 23, 2008 11:16 PM PST up reply actions  

Here is how I see it
I hope it puts your mind at ease some, but this is my breakdown of Tom's posting (full disclosure: I am a fan).

As far as the blaming the coaches banter, It is all in a jocular tone; however, it is not without its point.  A lot of times when things go wrong, there is usually a diary or two (and a couple threads elsewhere) where people criticize the coaches, and while there are definitely good comments/questions/wondering there is, in my view, an excess of criticism at times, and and too much of a reactionary tone, i.e., going from a reasonable discussion of strategy into a sort of expectation for there to always be a right answer to every problem, and not reaching that answer is Nate's fault, to the point of occasionally questioning whether Nate should be replaced.  Tom's diary is a satire of the more excessive criticisms that have come up.
I don't know if you caught it, but he questions Medina and Townsend on the basis of their being musicians, which is clearly joke, playing off of their last names.  It is not so much sarcasm as silliness, playing off of the foibles of the Blazersedge community (and really, any fan community).

 We clap not because we are easily amused, but because, as I see it, we can have some good natured ribbing concerning ourselves and our team (doesn't hurt that Tom does a good job of it).  As far as any political influences, I would say Tom reminds me of the Daily Show (Republican party, not so much), especially with the wordplay, references, and deadpan extension of existing attitudes or logic into absurdist fare.  You're welcome.

As far as tone, if you read Tom enough, you get a pretty clear sense of when he is serious and when he is not.  His tone tends to be pretty definite, at least as far as I have noticed.

As far as spotlight, I just think it is more Tom's personality to be this jocular about things, and is something he enjoys doing.  I find it a good reminder that this site is great because of how conversational it is, and I feel confident in saying that this is not an act but just an online extension of how talking with Tom would be.  The best part of all of this is that if you are really bothered by him, you don't have to read him.

As far as OJ, I'll say this: the man has been joked about since the trial started.  The case and the man have been milked for years worth of late night jokes (and still are).  That is not to say you can't be upset about it, but rather, it is standard fare for a lot of comedians, and Tom is not doing anything out of the ordinary, so such criticisms would need to more broadly aimed at pop-culture in general for its attitude toward OJ, and not squarely at Tom.

Hope this cleared some things up, or at least gives a different perspective than any you have perceived to be had 'round these parts.

I will never waste a beer. There are too many sober kids in India. -Rod Benson

by supremepuntiff on Feb 23, 2008 11:44 PM PST up reply actions  

well said
I owe Tom an apology having misread the tone of the message--Sorry, Tom. For some reason I thought you were being serious.

having been looking for explanations for the recent poor play, that particular topic really pushed me over the edge.

Keep in mind, this is coming from a fan who finds his lost truck keys last night at the bottom of a bag of bbq pork rinds.

Keep up the good work Tom and thanks to you Soup for the e-judo, I needed it.

Go PTB

by bow4meow on Feb 24, 2008 8:57 AM PST up reply actions  

Awe man
I was going to go off and ask you if you thought you were Roland the Gunslinger and you were trying to challenge me with without your falcon.  Oh well.  

The links to the two Blazer coaches are musicians webpages.  Not the real coaches.  That gave me an opportunity to say they are just musicians.  

As for O.J. I was going to use the patented Kobe excuse that he was never convicted.   It works every time.

As for me personally, I find humor in everything.  The only two things I have not been able to joke about is 9-11 and John Denver's untimely death.  Although, it is not from a lack of trying.

Stay gold, bow4meow. Stay gold.

"Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand." - Luke from Cool Hand Luke (1967)

by tominhawaii on Feb 24, 2008 12:02 PM PST up reply actions  

It is perhaps not so much humor
but Denver's biggest hit was "I'm leaving on a jet plane."  Perhaps it was like an Amy Winehouse song, a cry for help, except for country boys with disposable income, and we all missed it.

Too soon?

I will never waste a beer. There are too many sober kids in India. -Rod Benson

by supremepuntiff on Feb 24, 2008 12:44 PM PST up reply actions  

actually...
Leaving on a Jet Plane was never a hit for Mr. Denver.

by ken @ Blazer's Edge on Feb 24, 2008 12:53 PM PST up reply actions  

You know this, really?
Actually, I was given an iPod as a gift by a friend who is a HUGE John Denver fan.  He preloaded the thing and I don't have the directions to change the songs. I must have- I kid you not- 50 John Denver songs on there.  I am now very familiar with the JD repertoire.  I should not have admitted this in public.

by Section323 on Feb 24, 2008 1:00 PM PST up reply actions  

really.
He wrote it and it was the biggest hit of Peter, Paul and Mary's repertoire, but although John Denver recorded it many times, it was never a hit for him.  Not a substantial one in any case.

His biggest hit was probably Annie's Song.

by ken @ Blazer's Edge on Feb 24, 2008 1:09 PM PST up reply actions  

Dang
For some reason, even pre-crash, I just always associated that song with him and was under the impression that it was his most popular (or at least up there with Country Roads).
I will never waste a beer. There are too many sober kids in India. -Rod Benson

by supremepuntiff on Feb 24, 2008 1:20 PM PST up reply actions  

You err, Your Mercy
Tom is well Known to be a man much more inclined toward the joke and good sentiment than toward inflamamatory remarks. If he would be so inflammatory I had burned when he was kidding to me by replying my first posts with smoke and chocolate cliches. I could have burned because we euros keep inside ... Are you euro too?.  

"We should treat all the trivial things of life seriously and all the serious things of life with sincere and studied triviality". Oscar Wilde.

I like Brandon Roy, whatever planet he comes from. (Bill Walton?)

by amlmart1 on Feb 24, 2008 2:44 AM PST up reply actions  

Hmm
I seriously read this about 5 times trying to tell if YOU were serious or not, and then when my head wanted to explode from not being able to tell, I didn't respond. Till now.

by Section323 on Feb 24, 2008 11:53 AM PST up reply actions  

R U 4 Serious
Scrappy-Doo is a cartoon character.  
"Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand." - Luke from Cool Hand Luke (1967)

by tominhawaii on Feb 24, 2008 12:03 PM PST up reply actions  

NOO!!!
I must defend my honor.
I was not confused by YOUR post Tom, but bow4meow's reply (follow the thread, Tom, follow the thread!) Because people often feign outrage here, when they are kidding. I thought it HAD to be that, but then it didn't seem to be.  Thus, exploding head.

by Section323 on Feb 24, 2008 12:10 PM PST up reply actions  

Oh my bad
Sorry cousin.  I've got a dyslexic heart.  
"Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand." - Luke from Cool Hand Luke (1967)

by tominhawaii on Feb 24, 2008 12:41 PM PST up reply actions  

Man,
Tom loves his  Wikipedia.
The scoreboard actually caught fire here once

by Sabonis4Ever on Feb 24, 2008 12:45 AM PST reply actions  

Yeah
It's true.  I like how it tries to stay unbiased.  

Say you wanted to learn about Cher.

You could read this: http://www.cher.com/

Or you could read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cher

The choice for me is simple.

"Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand." - Luke from Cool Hand Luke (1967)

by tominhawaii on Feb 24, 2008 12:06 PM PST up reply actions  

Um..
"Say you wanted to learn about Cher"
I dont think that has ever happened to any person on this planet. Other planets maybe, ours no.

by Sabonis4Ever on Feb 24, 2008 12:17 PM PST up reply actions  

Cher
Isn't she the one that useta run around with some guy who was a Republican Congressman from a western state?

Oh wait, I'm thinking of Vicki Iseman.

My bad; sorry.

by knickfan on Feb 24, 2008 12:25 PM PST up reply actions  

Nice one
Cher died a long time ago.  Now, she is continually replaced by drag queens to keep her looking young and masculine.  
"Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand." - Luke from Cool Hand Luke (1967)

by tominhawaii on Feb 24, 2008 12:45 PM PST up reply actions  

Well
I can feel something inside me say, I reaal don't hink your str- oh, no wait, that's just another rib trying to get free.
I will never waste a beer. There are too many sober kids in India. -Rod Benson

by supremepuntiff on Feb 24, 2008 1:21 PM PST up reply actions  

Way unfair, Tom,...
Let's all get serious here and finally put the blame squarely where it belongs - on the shoulders of Dave, England Dan and all the other posters who insist on being realists.

Think about it.  Ann Landers once said that people would live up to or down to our expectations of them.  If we'd all just come to the realization that the Blazers are destined to win every single game they play by double digits, then by garsh that's what they'll do!  They'll simply have no choice.

So... let's hear no more talk about youth, rookie walls, inexperience, etc..  NO MORE REALITY!  This team is the greatest team ever assembled and it's about time we recognize that fact.

After they win the NBA title, they are all going to don spiked shoes and gloves, form a baseball team, join the Major League and win the pennant.  On weekends they will individually win all the major golf and tennis tournaments.  The Stanley Cup is a foregone conclusion.  I'm particularly looking forward to the America's cup.

There is nothing this team can't do if we, as fanatics... er, I mean fans, would just realize it.

If you don't believe me, just ask Bill Simmons.

by ken @ Blazer's Edge on Feb 24, 2008 2:13 AM PST reply actions  

Oh, by the way, tom
I'm a little surprised that you let Dean Demopoulos off so easily in your diary.

For the mnemonically challenged among you, I'll remind you that it was Demopoulos who was the acting head coach when the Blazers' 13-game winning streak came to an end in Utah. That loss so rattled the young Blazer squad that it made them realize that they were not, in fact, invincible.

In a sense, the blame for all of the Blazers' subsequent difficulties can be traced directly back to Demopoulos' craptacular coaching on that fateful night by the shores of the Great Salt Lake.  He never should have been allowed back on to the team plane. He should have remained in Utah, married a couple of Provo gals, quit basketball altogether, and then opened up a roadside tire repair stand along US Highway 189.  

by knickfan on Feb 24, 2008 1:53 PM PST reply actions  

Jeez, I had forgotten'
and never really put it together.

Now I'm starting to Boil!

This will no longer be a forgotten Fact (if it's true) in my annuals of PTB history.

This will no longer be forgotten, or Forgivn"!

"The Team with Caricature!" - Elizabeth "The Lizzard" Lowblow

by Lizzy Lowblow on Feb 24, 2008 2:02 PM PST reply actions  

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