Junk Drawer 12/27 Destination Wedding edition
3:30 and no junk drawer? What, are you spending time with your families? Geez.
How about Philly's crash and burn ending against Denver yesterday. Sigh.
But here's my actual topic: I've been invited to a destination wedding in the Carribean in February. A good (but no longer especially close) friend, a lovely location. But, it will cost me close to $2000 when all is said and done. I theoretically have $2000 to spend, but would frankly rather spend it on something else. Plus I hate to fly. Should I go? And if I don't, what should I tell her?
6 recs |
75 comments
Comments
Oh, the Caribbean in February is pretty nice.
If you have the money, GO!
If you don’t, she’ll understand. After all, she’s asking you to pay $2000 just to watch her get married.
"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car"
by you'vegottomakeyourfreethrows on Dec 27, 2008 3:45 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
nah
the carribeam is overrated
The true meaning of Christmas is the celebration of a never ending love . Not the love we think of in desiring or possessing someone else, but rather the conscious unconditional love which seeks only the perfection of its object and is, at the deepest level, the underlying and uniting force of the Universe.
by Love on Dec 27, 2008 4:31 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
yeah, you're right I guess...
if you hate 80 degree weather, perfect blue water, white sandy beaches, and a totally laid back atmosphere.
"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car"
by you'vegottomakeyourfreethrows on Dec 28, 2008 10:27 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
if she's asking you to spend 2k to watch her get married....
that means her family must be shelling out a bazillion and one dollars for the wedding, meaning a measly extra 2k wouldn’t be that much of an expense for them to cover.
Wait you’re agnostic. That means you worship lawsuits. --TiH
by prezofdeath on Dec 28, 2008 5:38 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
;=)
Wait you’re agnostic. That means you worship lawsuits. --TiH
by prezofdeath on Dec 28, 2008 5:38 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Only go if you want to go.
My entire intermediate family all live here in the Portland metro area. About 3 years ago my younger brother announced he was going to be getting married in Las Vegas and wanted all of us to go. I had the money to go but like yourself I would have rather spent the money on other things. (I don’t like flying either) I figured if he wanted me to attend he’d have his wedding here in Portland. In a way I think it’s wrong to have a wedding far away and expect others to show up… but that’s just me.
As for what to say to your friend. Lie, hehe. Tell her that you’re short on funds but if she was willing to pay your way then you’d be more than glad to attend. Problem solved.
by JoeBlazer on Dec 27, 2008 4:04 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
If you don't go
and your friend and you live not too far from each other, take her and her spouse out for a nice dinner. This should cost less than the $2000 to go to the wedding and accomplish much of the same goals that going would (minus a vacation in the Carribean of course). Plus it can double as a wedding present too.
by tingeyga on Dec 27, 2008 4:06 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
very late JD entry
on a game day too… hmmm… I know whats going on here and it AINT gonna happen.
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
by bow4meow on Dec 27, 2008 4:06 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I think the JD usually gets a fair amount of posting action after the game
Post count may be light till then tho.
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 5:30 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
what to tell her
how about you’re afraid to fly and even if you could all your money went to the save snowzilla fund.
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
by bow4meow on Dec 27, 2008 4:07 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
This topic is close to me this year...
My wife and I got married this year. All our family was going to need to fly into town (from significant distances) to attend. So we considered a destination wedding. For about 10 seconds.
Then we realized what torture it would be for every other person outside our family. All our local friends would be expected to spend gobs of money (that they may or may not have) just to see us get married, even though they see us regularly already. It’s especially asking a lot during a bad economy, with huge airplane ticket prices.
If we’d done a destination wedding, we’d had personally told every guest that we’d take no offense if they missed the wedding. (We stayed local, our friends had a great time, our family was our family, and all was well with the world.)
It turned out that my wife’s family already had dealt with one destination wedding this year. They hated it; it was demanding of their time (loss of vacation hours) and resources. It was also exhausting. Just to see two people say “I do”. They were very cool if people could not make it, and did not hold it against anyone.
Most people who do a destination wedding understand that this is different, expensive for guests, and time-consuming. If you’re no longer close friends, it’s especially important to keep that in mind. Unless they think they’re the center of the world, they will be very understanding when you tell them it’s just not feasible to go. If they don’t understand, or hold it against you, you’ve learned something very important about them.
Someone noted that a dinner would be nice, and would make a nice present. I’d probably consider one further step. A card and a present (doesn’t have to be expensive, just something on their list), and an offer of a nice dinner. No biggie if the dinner doesn’t happen.
Spend the rest of the money on yourself or something important to you. Or hey, save it for a rainy day.
by Timmay! on Dec 27, 2008 4:17 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
Hey, thanks for your thoughts on this one
I don’t begrudge her the destination wedding. She doesn’t really have a home base right now (and was trying to fend of her fiance’s huge family), but . . .
Anyway, boy, people really stayed on topic here, such as it is.
Where’s TIH when you need him!
by Section323 on Dec 27, 2008 5:22 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
as if by magic he appears
like Kazoo
by LetsBlaze on Dec 27, 2008 5:31 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
dont you mean the Great Gazoo
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
by bow4meow on Dec 27, 2008 5:36 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Only go if you want to go
We lived in Hawaii and thought about getting married here. It would have excluded a bunch of people, and the cheap people that would like to go, would have wanted to sleep on our couch. We went back to Oregon to get married. To be honest, one reason we wanted to have it here was to keep my family from attending.
Destination weddings are a gatekeeper. I wouldn’t go unless you want to see the Caribbean and have someone to hang with. The wedding couple will have other plans.
"There is a difference between having two guys banging down low and having two guys who can bang down low." - Blazin'
by tominhawaii on Dec 27, 2008 5:27 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
still waiting for my invitation Tom
by LetsBlaze on Dec 27, 2008 5:29 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Shoots I got married two years ago
Do a search on Blazers Edge for Message in the Bottle to read about it.
"There is a difference between having two guys banging down low and having two guys who can bang down low." - Blazin'
by tominhawaii on Dec 28, 2008 11:59 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Why does the destination have to be a gatekeeper
shouldn’t the invitation itself be that?
by tingeyga on Dec 28, 2008 3:40 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Nice one
"There is a difference between having two guys banging down low and having two guys who can bang down low." - Blazin'
by tominhawaii on Dec 28, 2008 4:07 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Plan B
wait for a year to pass without any contact. At that time, email them and tell them how sorry you are because you thought the date was in 2010. They’ll appreciate this then.
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
by bow4meow on Dec 27, 2008 5:40 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
The prices of tickets to the Islands
Change wildly every day,Im so confused,what should I do?
by southern oregon on Dec 27, 2008 6:10 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
If you wanted to go, you probably wouldn't have asked
I’ve said no to destination weddings before, and the bride and groom were very understanding. Once a few of us got together later for a weekend jaunt closer to home. We had a great time, mostly because we actually got to spend time with the two of them.
by Corvid on Dec 27, 2008 6:49 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
hmmm. late in the day and nineteen comments.
Great game tonight.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 9:40 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
Brandon tweaked his hamstring... they're checking on it currently.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 9:40 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
It would suck to not have Brandon against Boston.
Blech. Get well soon Mr. Roy.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 9:42 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
What a game tonight tho.
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 9:52 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
on 95.5 on the way home,
I heard them say Roy’s hammy was just some cramping and he should be fine. So that’s good news.
by DrivetheLane on Dec 27, 2008 10:10 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
dodged a bullet there
We need him to score early and often if we want to take Boston down.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 10:16 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
It’s called reading, top to bottom left to right. A group a words together is called a sentence. Take Tylenol for any headaches, Midol for any cramps.
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 10:16 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
if you score more points than the other team
you win.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 10:17 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
When Roy goes off
I like to check out opposing forums. The Raptors forum on Real GM had a lot of cursing at Brian Colangelo for not drafting Roy. And a lot of Roy love, actually. Good read!
http://www.realgm.com/boards/viewtopic.php?f=32&t=865749&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=585
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 9:53 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
(the Roy love goes on for pages, actually. Check the link)
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 9:53 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
"wtf roy is using cheat codes or something"
“ROY terrorizing the RAPS!”
“WOW,ROY IS INSANE”
“Now THAT”s taking over a game. Roy is a superstar.."
“Brandon Roy has an unbelievable mid jumpshot. He’s the next Kobe in term of terrific jumpshooting.”
“Does Portland have any scrubs?”
“Man look at Roy’s face.. just emotionless. He’s just doing everything at his own will.”
“roy > raps team”
“lol. there’s nothing you can do with this guy. he is simply amazing.”
“Roy is amazing…My goodness”
“We are lucky the game was as close and entertaining as it was. Kudos to the Blazers fans, second to none. Too bad the Raps crowds can’t encourage like that.”
by Sabonis4Ever on Dec 28, 2008 4:46 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
I also enjoyed when they said Brandon must have entered a cheat code.
by Timmay! on Dec 28, 2008 9:19 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
that was funny
but he was in God mode
My rapper name is Krafty Mo-Beek.
by bow4meow on Dec 28, 2008 3:23 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
I am sure
Section 323 is a honest,decent person and picked a good time to take a shot at the title but I am backing the champs play with this meaningless comment
by southern oregon on Dec 27, 2008 9:59 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I'm with you
southern oregon. but to make my comment a little more meaningful, I’d like to say that I really like the Blazers. The Blazers are cool. The Blazers make me happy. Except when they lose or play bad. Then the Blazers don’t make me happy. But tonight, they made me happy. I like the Blazers.
by DrivetheLane on Dec 27, 2008 10:12 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Are we brothers?
I feel the same way. We must be brothers. Unless in fact you are a girl, in which case being brothers is not very plausible. If that’s the case we may be sisters.
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 10:14 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
That didn't make much sense to me
Perhaps you should clarify.
by Corvid on Dec 27, 2008 10:15 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Sure, no problem
To clarify, I’d like to 2nd that…
I’d like to say that I really like the Blazers. The Blazers are cool. The Blazers make me happy. Except when they lose or play bad. Then the Blazers don’t make me happy. But tonight, they made me happy. I like the Blazers.
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 10:18 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
I think he is both male and female.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 10:18 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Oh right, that clarification.
I guess that’s the conclusion that is necessary.
Either that, or it’s Saturday night and the Blazers won again and I’m drunk.
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 10:19 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Ahhh
Now it is much clearer.
Also, I would like to add that I really like the Blazers. The Blazers are cool. The Blazers make me happy.
by Corvid on Dec 27, 2008 10:20 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Holy crap! How many brothers do I have?
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 10:20 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
At risk of confusing you
I’d have to be your sister.
by Corvid on Dec 27, 2008 10:21 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
To further add to the conversation
I also enjoy watching the Blazers.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 10:15 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Boy, tough crowd
while I wasn’t actively courting the title, I did think I had a decent shot.
I don’t think it will happen during the season, as someone else noted recently.
Plus someone can always sabotage after the fact.
by Section323 on Dec 27, 2008 10:53 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Ha, I knew it!
Do you really want to twin the title that way? Late in the day, on a game day, when many a Bedger is away? It just doesnt seem right and thankfully only served to show how superior to all other Junk Drawers THEE record is and will always be.
"You Sir, are a wiggily worm, sir, and a Wiggily worm, Sir, is the lowest form of whale blubber in the ocean depths." --- Princestone U. student to Fred before the big game.
by bow4meow on Dec 28, 2008 9:01 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
And the record stands once more.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 10:19 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I knew I could count on you Cablinasian
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 10:19 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
High fives all around tonight.
It was a good effort.
honor rasheed wallace
by Cablinasian on Dec 27, 2008 10:29 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Gotta love the post-game-thread JD explosion.
(that’s what she said)
"I never scored more than 38, even in Little League." ~ Roy, 52 pts
by shralpster on Dec 27, 2008 10:21 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
Absolute silliness
But mission accomplished. G’night all!
by Corvid on Dec 27, 2008 10:23 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
LoL
You people are killing me. On behalf of the academy…I would like to thank my family for sticking with all these years
That 70's show:
Kelso: Red! I guess ur wondering why I'm going through your stuff. See, I needed to borrow your saw...because I need to chop down a tree...because there's something stuck in it...an animal...a rabbit...and I would like to return that rabbit to the wild so it can lay its eggs!
Red: Kelso, rabbits don't..............how the hell did a rabbit get up a tree?
Kelso: uhhhhhh Eric threw it up there.
Red: Eric threw a rabbit up a tree?
Kelso: Yeah, he's a sadistic bastard.
by 92wastheyear on Dec 27, 2008 11:10 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I am going to Mexico for a week during spring break for my cousins' wedding
but my dad is paying for it. so….ask your dad i guess.
by Sabonis4Ever on Dec 28, 2008 4:30 AM PST reply actions 0 recs
can this Junk Drawer be put out of its misery please?
Allow some other contender…. nay, pretender to step up.
"You Sir, are a wiggily worm, sir, and a Wiggily worm, Sir, is the lowest form of whale blubber in the ocean depths." --- Princestone U. student to Fred before the big game.
by bow4meow on Dec 28, 2008 9:03 AM PST reply actions 0 recs
One thing about destination weddings
Grandparents and other older family members and friends might be unable to attend on account of the various difficulties encountered in traveling. I am old school (and by some definitions, just plain old), but it seems to me that a wedding is an occasion in which extended families should be represented. Recently I’ve seen a trend toward excluding older folks, even parents, from participation at weddings and events leading up to them. Examples: a bachelor party with only the peer group invited; a wedding shower excluding parents and their close friends. </curmudgeon mode.
by CatMan2 on Dec 28, 2008 11:12 AM PST reply actions 0 recs
Meant to mention this at the game
but totally forgot …
Nope, don’t go and don’t feel badly. I am assuming that there aren’t others going that you are close to and could play with while you are there. This is a trip that should be made with friend(s).
As to what to tell her, “I’m sorry, I won’t be able to attend your wedding. Have a wonderful time.” will do. RSVPs do not require reasons. If she presses you, “It just won’t work for me.” If she presses you further just repeat the last sentence or say “there are a number of personal reasons that I cannot go.” She has no need to know the reasons. If she pushes you for specifics she is extremely rude and you can rejoice that you chose not to go :-)
by jorga on Dec 28, 2008 12:13 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I was just at the Celtics Blog
They have a chat feature on their game days and an open tread.
http://www.celticsblog.com/2008/12/26/702401/on-the-rebound-in-oakland
They’re also not happy about their losing streak. I blame Bill Simmons.
"There is a difference between having two guys banging down low and having two guys who can bang down low." - Blazin'
by tominhawaii on Dec 28, 2008 12:51 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
Celtics play Sacramento tonight
I really want the Celtics to win tonight. If they lost a third straight, they’d be coming into Portland looking to make an example out of our team again.
As to their chat features, the numbers speak for themselves. We have the best blogosphere around.
My rapper name is Krafty Mo-Beek.
by bow4meow on Dec 28, 2008 3:27 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah but a triple OT would be nice
by southern oregon on Dec 28, 2008 4:29 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
ok that would be nice
either way Boston gets tomorrow night off so they’ll have fresh enough legs.
(OT) Sorry about the rock delay, I went to the Post Office Christmas eve and they closed at 1pm about an hour before I got there. Their sign said “special holiday hours” yea real special of em to shut it down early. So mailing them tomorrow.
My rapper name is Krafty Mo-Beek.
by bow4meow on Dec 28, 2008 4:42 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
If you don't go
Simply say, it costs to much.
M, period. Fresh, comma.
by manzell on Dec 28, 2008 2:22 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
0-16
"There is a difference between having two guys banging down low and having two guys who can bang down low." - Blazin'
by tominhawaii on Dec 28, 2008 2:51 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I heart/hate you
Roy To The World
by Outlaw is Rejector on Dec 28, 2008 6:57 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Go
chances like that don’t come around very often
There is probably no more terrible instance of enlightenment than the one in which you discover your father is a man — with human flesh.
Paul Muad'Dib - Dune (Frank Herbert)
My Translation: My Dad is a dude just like me, and my sons are dudes like me also. I love that.
Season Tix: Section 315, with my sons
by johnv59 on Dec 28, 2008 2:57 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
Where is the new junk drawer?
Want to talk about my Eagles stomping the Cryboys.
by Sabonis4Ever on Dec 28, 2008 3:30 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
its only 4:43 pm PST
give it another couple hours… someone wants it badly enough
My rapper name is Krafty Mo-Beek.
by bow4meow on Dec 28, 2008 4:43 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
And you will be there to pounce upon them
like Bonzie on a mouse
That 70's show:
Kelso: Red! I guess ur wondering why I'm going through your stuff. See, I needed to borrow your saw...because I need to chop down a tree...because there's something stuck in it...an animal...a rabbit...and I would like to return that rabbit to the wild so it can lay its eggs!
Red: Kelso, rabbits don't..............how the hell did a rabbit get up a tree?
Kelso: uhhhhhh Eric threw it up there.
Red: Eric threw a rabbit up a tree?
Kelso: Yeah, he's a sadistic bastard.
by 92wastheyear on Dec 28, 2008 4:53 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
wow
2,000$ bucks….
If you can justify it I say go ahead, but thats so much money to drop on someone elses wedding when they would likely understand if you couldn’t make it. But It’s a special event, so I dunno how much weight you should really put in all of our opinions on the subject.
Thanks again 323 for hooking me up, and hanging out with me for that game, was a great event even if we couldn’t pull off the win :-/ … I hope you got home alright, my way sucked, I had to wait at the Max stop for 5 trains to go by before being able to board one, and it was still super crammed, then I had to flag a taxi, and the guy wasn’t willing to drive me unless the fair was at least 10 bucks… So we drove around my apartments a few times lol! Thanks again though, made my christmas!
Roy To The World
by Outlaw is Rejector on Dec 28, 2008 7:00 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
sounds kind of like my trip
I got the Yellow Max just fine to Killingsworth, but the bus never came so I walked the last two+ miles. Got home close to midnight.
Maybe we should’ve just stayed home. (mostly kidding!)
by Section323 on Dec 28, 2008 9:00 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

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