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Who is KP? Let's pseudo figure it out and challenge him to a battle of the wits

So, by now everyone knows that KP reads BE, even posting once in a while.  But, for some strange reason (I think it has to do with elves) he won't tell us who he is. 

While it would be fun one day if KP outed himself, we can't really encourage it right now because his posts would be a matter of record.  We KNOW Canzano would be trolling through old posts.  If KP's who I think, he's said some very, very funny things.  But it's not the sort of professionalism he'd need to publicly maintiain.  On the other hand, if KP just posts informative NBATV boring types posts he's pretty safe.

Now, this all changes if KP delivers the mother of all treats, and NBA Title, he won't need to hide behind a moniker.  At that point, he'll be so popular nothing (and I mean nothing) could bring him down. 

THIS IS MY CHALLENGE TO KP.  IF/WHEN THE BLAZERS WIN A CHAMPIONSHIP, PLEASE REVEAL YOURSELF TO US  You're already the best GM in the league.  It's not only because you nail nearly all your decisions, but because you interact so well with fans.  This would be your Blazers Edge coup de grace ( meaning awesomeness not mercy).  It'd be sort of like shaving your head or getting a faux hawk (which would just be sooooo cool, but maybe a bit much to ask).

Well, KP, if you see this, let us know.  I get my Blazer news mainly from Dave and Ben here, O-live (Quick or Freeman, but I think quick qould be a funnier person to relay such a message), Barret's Blog, and of course from Senor Holdhallllllllll.  I'm sure if you told someone else, we'd all the word though. 

In the meantime, let's get some suggestions about who KP might be.  I've long thought it was Mortimer, but this guys zaruga sounded pretty KPish lately.  If I can get some suggestions, I'll throw a poll up and we can all vote. 

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Ho-Bob

You should link up some of the more KP-esque comments from these two. Let us take a look at what you are seeing. I mean Morty, for instance, claims to live in LA and has this creepy lookin’ dog. We all know that KP would actually light himself on fire before living down there and it is a well known fact that he is deathly allergic to dogs. It-is-a-well-known-fact!

"I figured out how to get the canoe down the mountain, but I will need a snow blower and all your butter"-Michael Kelso

by 92wastheyear on Oct 11, 2008 2:44 PM PDT   0 recs

becuase mortimer is kp.

The faith (and I'm a guy) perverts. :)

by faith on Oct 11, 2008 3:07 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Do you think KP actually has the time to post as frequently

as Mortimer? Not to mention the length of many of Mort’s posts on here as well as on other team’s pages?

The Zaruga character you can tell has been a fan for a long time and lived through the trader Bob era. His familiarity with that situation goes beyond someone who has just discussed it with others or read up on the situation. That DQ’s him as KP. Zaruga probably works for the team or knows someone who works for the team but I don’t believe him to be KP either.

I'm a little confused by your tactics

by oderiferous emanations 74 on Oct 11, 2008 3:40 PM PDT   0 recs

think about it. anytime the jumbotron show's a picture of kp, he's alway's on his phone....

KP is bedging during the games!!!! who’s often on the game threads? Mortimer!! Mr Morty is kp!
he won’t deny it.

The faith (and I'm a guy) perverts. :)

by faith on Oct 11, 2008 4:58 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I doubt ...

it’s anyone who’s posted a diary or fanpost …. It would have to be someone who simply commented here or there—I’m guessing either on a draft post or a post about Blazer management. Or maybe he set up an Oden/Durant poll 2 drafts ago … Any suspicious characters polling fan opinion around the 2007 draft?

"These are dreams that we have." --Rudolfo Fernandez

by bfan on Oct 11, 2008 4:11 PM PDT   0 recs

YOU DID, SIR!

Ok, well no Oden/Durant fanposts, but you DID do a “Well Greg Oden will be ok and let’s not cry” after he got hurt. Somewhat suspicious…..

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

by prezofdeath on Oct 11, 2008 11:33 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Link

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

by prezofdeath on Oct 11, 2008 11:34 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I would rather not know

It would detract from the goodness that is Blazers Edge.

by Sabonis4Ever on Oct 11, 2008 4:25 PM PDT   0 recs

He's certainly not Mortimer.

Look at all those posts Mortimer makes on the game day threads during the games. You think that’s how KP would be spending his time while the Blazers are playing?!

by TwoDeep on Oct 11, 2008 4:54 PM PDT   0 recs

IT'S MORTIMER!!!

The faith (and I'm a guy) perverts. :)

by faith on Oct 11, 2008 5:00 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I told you!!

The Creepy dog proves it ain’t Mort

"I figured out how to get the canoe down the mountain, but I will need a snow blower and all your butter"-Michael Kelso

by 92wastheyear on Oct 11, 2008 5:07 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Sometimes I think Mortimer is Dave

Because Mortimer always seems to be the guy talking Blazers fasn off the ledges they are always contemplating jumping off of after injuries and losses. After a while, I just figured Mortimer is just Mortimer. I think he really is a white guy engaged to an African American woman in California with a dog and he used to live with some Asian women. When he complained about the LA car flags, is when I was convinced he’s really in California. And he has said enough about his life and brought it up again that makes me think he is just Mortimer, because he would need some sort of flow chart to keep up with all the stories he shares. I do often wonder why he’s only posted two diaries.

I always wonder about Dave. He used to comment all the time. Having to read every comment would take up a lot of time and would probably make him want to comment a lot. I think he has to have another name just where he can be one of the guys and a happy go lucky fan instead of the level headed Dave of Blazer’s Edge.

This is a slippery slope. I think I found Channing Frye on here and he hasn’t been back since I asked him if he was Frye. I’d rather have Dave posting as Jscot and KP posting as SergioFTW with anonymity than for them to be outed and not post at all.

Blazers Edge has an alarmist vision and a poet's heart.

by tominhawaii on Oct 12, 2008 6:33 AM PDT   1 recs

somethings wrong with you tom.

that was the most ……normal….thing I’ve ever read that you wrote.

The faith (and I'm a guy) perverts. :)

by faith on Oct 12, 2008 6:54 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I'm getting my game face on

Blazers Edge has an alarmist vision and a poet's heart.

by tominhawaii on Oct 12, 2008 7:32 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I am always amazed at the frequency of your avatar changes

It’s like a peacock revealing its plumage one feather at a time.

by DonkeyShins on Oct 12, 2008 9:24 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I try to time it with a new signature and a new snarky comment on my profile page

I’m actually quite partial to the new avatar but the signature might have to go soon. I had a Josh Howard avatar when I almost got kicked off the Jazz blog and the U of O blog didn’t like it either. I haven’t been to those blogs since.

Blazers Edge has an alarmist vision and a poet's heart.

by tominhawaii on Oct 12, 2008 9:59 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Hey Tom

Do you have a link to when you almost got de-Jazzed…..I would love to read it

"I figured out how to get the canoe down the mountain, but I will need a snow blower and all your butter"-Michael Kelso

by 92wastheyear on Oct 12, 2008 10:08 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

They deleted it and gave me a warning

I posted a link to a gag gift where you can make a chocolate replica of a penis. I said the Blazers were going to give those out instead of IRoys so that Oden can be rookie of the year. After they deleted my comment and did a thing that I had to acknowledge the warning I wrote two snarky posts, and requested they e-mail me and explain. I haven’t been back since Basketball John e-mailed me. They’re good people over there, so I just let it go.

In the U of O one, I said that if the Duck won the Boise State game, that the U of O guy should guest blog and talk about having sex with their cats and I linked this. Some guy named butthol didn’t like it and asked about banning.

Blazers Edge has an alarmist vision and a poet's heart.

by tominhawaii on Oct 12, 2008 10:23 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

LMAO!

Ah Tommy….you have to ramp up to stuff like that with people who don’t know you. Especially religious people ….they don’t understand that you are harmless (sorta)

"I figured out how to get the canoe down the mountain, but I will need a snow blower and all your butter"-Michael Kelso

by 92wastheyear on Oct 12, 2008 10:36 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Butthol? That in itself should get him banned.

Odenied: If you're given lemmings—make lemming-ade (Bow4Meow)

by Norsktroll on Oct 12, 2008 11:28 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Ouch

butthol also posts here on BE. See here: http://www.sbnation.com/users/butthol/activity/37

by royroty on Oct 12, 2008 8:39 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

What got me

Is that they cuss like sailors over there. I don’t really think I said anything ban worthy over at Addicted to Quack, it was just one of those “of all people to talk about banning” kind of things. it’s a swell blog too.

Blazers Edge has an alarmist vision and a poet's heart.

by tominhawaii on Oct 13, 2008 4:15 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Who did you think was Frye?

"People? You man Sheeple."

by Mike-Fu on Oct 12, 2008 9:29 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

http://www.sbnation.com/users/Keepportlandweird

Blazers Edge has an alarmist vision and a poet's heart.

by tominhawaii on Oct 12, 2008 10:00 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Why'd you scare him off?

The faith (and I'm a guy) perverts. :)

by faith on Oct 12, 2008 10:05 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

lol.

yeah, had he admitted to being channlin’, he’d probably have some answerin to do. Given the mood of his post.

guy should be an announcer once he retires though, he’s pretty chuckly.

The faith (and I'm a guy) perverts. :)

by faith on Oct 12, 2008 1:07 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I'd rather have Dave posting as jscot, too

Then I could post as Dave and get my stuff on the front page without having to pimp for recs.

The most amazing thing about my amazing ego is I have amazingly little about which to be egotistical.
The pick and roll this year will emphasize "roll" followed by "dunk", followed by the wailings and lamentations of your women.

by jscot on Oct 12, 2008 2:11 PM PDT to parent up   1 recs

Q-U-A-L-I-T-Y-P-I-E

SHHH

Nature bats last.

by fisheyes on Oct 12, 2008 1:04 PM PDT   0 recs

sorry,

my sarcasim/indirect to direct sensor isn’t working, hasn’t for the past 29 years, so forgive my stupidity, but are you sugesting qualitypie is kp? or are you telling quality pie not to tell us who is kp…

I’m slow…..in that department. pretty quick in others..but not the thought processing one.

The faith (and I'm a guy) perverts. :)

by faith on Oct 12, 2008 1:09 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

QP = KP

Could be.

"You're really making me feel good about myself, little man," says Oden as he starts dancing after scoring a goal. "You better come harder than that."

by BlueBooYay on Oct 12, 2008 1:24 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Nope

He got a fact wrong once that KP would have never done. And it obviously wasn’t a put-on. Don’t remember what it was.

I think its fisheyes. He wanted Durant, and KP wanted Durant, but Nate and Paul Allen made him take Greg.

The most amazing thing about my amazing ego is I have amazingly little about which to be egotistical.
The pick and roll this year will emphasize "roll" followed by "dunk", followed by the wailings and lamentations of your women.

by jscot on Oct 12, 2008 2:12 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Spencerbutte

Is if not a legitimate suspect at least a person of interest.

by southern oregon on Oct 12, 2008 2:22 PM PDT   0 recs

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