Zach Explained

by Dave on Feb 9, 2007 1:40 AM PST in News

Likely overwhelmed by the last three day's conversation about Zach--in the Prophet's diary, in the chat with Kevin Pritchard, in our own "Who's Controversial?" post--the following realization struck me in the midst of making dinner:

Sometimes when you make french fries at home you can't eat a whole bag so you put the remainder back in the freezer. But no matter how tight you seal that thing it always gets freezer burn. Then when you pull the fries out again to cook the rest they're all covered in ice and slightly discolored. And you know they're still good and all...quite edible...but no matter how long you cook them (or in what way you do so) they're just going to be a little off in taste and of soggy consistency.

Well, Zach is a freezer-burned french fry.

Some folks will say, "What's the matter with you? Those fries are still good! Would you rather be eating Brussels Sprouts?" And they're right. But other folks will say, "Yes, but if you really want the highest quality dining experience you can't find it there. You can bake it until it's burnt and smoke comes out but that fry's always gonna be a little off." And they're right too.

And that's where we are.

That was my big epiphany. You can go back to figuring out how to trade Jamaal, Juan, and a second-rounder for KG now.

--Dave (blazersub@yahoo.com)

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Comments

heh heh

I don't think even McHale makes that trade.

As for Zach, I don't disagree but I don't really see the value of rushing to move him and getting nothing useful in return. I don't want Carter, he pounds the ball on the perimeter and jacks up threes. I don't want Gasol either, he has all Zach's faults and more besides. Zach is our best player this year and if we move him, which I am fine with, I want real value in return.

The trade must make the Blazers a better team if its to be done, none of this 'just trade him for 75 cents on the dollar so we can run and gun' stuff.

by JPop on Feb 9, 2007 2:34 AM PST reply actions

In other words...

a slightly soggy french fry is better than a day-old turnip.

--Dave

by Dave on Feb 9, 2007 2:35 AM PST up reply actions

well...

Thinking in terms of long-term health, we seem to have changed our eating habits as a whole. But a few fries (even soggy ones) with an otherwise healthy meal is OK, no? Better than the Whitsitt days that cut off the blood to our heart.
(Sorry to twist your metaphor, Dave. Couldn't help it.)

by JPOregon on Feb 9, 2007 5:47 AM PST reply actions

ugh

sorry, just have to add:
hmmmmmm, french fries

by JPOregon on Feb 9, 2007 5:51 AM PST up reply actions

Put down that fry!

You don't know where it's been...

by ken @ Blazer's Edge on Feb 9, 2007 6:03 AM PST reply actions

Snort!

by jorga on Feb 9, 2007 7:17 AM PST reply actions

Personally,

I don't think Zach has ever been stashed in the freezer. He's still the fresh version. He may have not have been derived from the very highest quality potato available, but he is still better than 90% of those in the garden.

by TwoDeep on Feb 9, 2007 9:10 AM PST reply actions

Zach...

is an oven-baked fry, not deep fried.

by blazerprophet on Feb 9, 2007 9:44 AM PST reply actions

...not so fast

Wasn't Damon the 'baked' fry?

by DonkeyShins on Feb 9, 2007 10:51 AM PST up reply actions

O

BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!

by blazerprophet on Feb 9, 2007 12:22 PM PST up reply actions

Any Thoughts?

Hey I read that Elton Brand may be on the trading block. Maggette has been on the block for awhile. What if we traded Z-BO and Magloire for EB and Maggette?

Does that fill the 3 & 4 for Portland and the 4 & a solid backup 5 for the CLippers.

Was Damon really a bad Blazer, or did he get the short end of the stick?

by rpxxxiv on Feb 9, 2007 10:49 AM PST reply actions

Oh, I'd do this in an instant

to get Brand. But there's no way the Clippers make that trade.

Other than not having quite so much outside range, Brand is pretty much the model for what people are hoping Zach could become, much as Marion is a model for what Darius could (have) become.

by Dave on Feb 9, 2007 10:53 AM PST up reply actions

ok, how bout this...

same trade that rpxxxiv suggested, but add our first round pick along too... how bout that? By the way, espn's trade machine says it's a go... I'm still not sure if the clips would really consider it... also, this trade can still works if you add juan, dan, martell (did i just say that?), travis, or any one other player who's contract is under 3 mil. this year... just food for thought

by Blindsteepler on Feb 9, 2007 11:19 PM PST up reply actions

We'd need to see where that first rounder is first

If it's 1-4, probably not. If we get slapped back to 10-14 I think you'd think about it if the Clippers would.

Having Brand and Magette plus Joel, Lamarcus, Martell, Travis, Roy, Jack, and Sergio wouldn't make us contenders but I bet it would let us make a healthy run at the 7th or 8th spots next year, even as our kids keep getting better.

--Dave

by Dave on Feb 9, 2007 11:52 PM PST up reply actions

dave excellent analogy

zach on a team like the bulls cavs,bucks,knicks,heat,pistons is a perfect fit,on the blazers he's been here since the downspirial of this franchise and hopefully he'll not be here when this team goes foreward,guys i can't wait to see the day how this chatroom will be when this team is 35-15 instead of 20-30 can't wait can you dave....

by fatty on Feb 9, 2007 12:20 PM PST reply actions

Son of a gun...

Dave is right on the money. This is the Smeagol side.

by ken @ Blazer's Edge on Feb 9, 2007 12:31 PM PST up reply actions

I have a PhD

in Fattyology. That is why he's one of my favorites.

Seriously there wouldn't be nearly as much interesting color around here without the Margin Mangler. (Shaq has 92 nicknames, all of them bad...why can't Fatty have a few?) He's...different. And that's good.

--Dave

by Dave on Feb 9, 2007 12:34 PM PST up reply actions

And I'm not just saying that

because he praised my analogy, complimented the site, AND made a very good point all in the same post.

But come to think of it, that IS a pretty good post...

--Dave

by Dave on Feb 9, 2007 12:36 PM PST up reply actions

Oh, I assure you...

I appreciate Fatty and everyone else in this blog. You have everyone from drama queens to old cynics like me and everyone usually has respect for everyone else.

Now if I could just convince Ripcitygal that older is better.

Oh, well.

by ken @ Blazer's Edge on Feb 9, 2007 12:40 PM PST up reply actions